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It’s my fault

I’m a small town girl living on her own for the first time in a really big city going to college. I’ve been dating my boyfriend (who lives 5 hours away) for almost 5 years and one night I went out with some friends and ended up getting really wasted to where I blacked out for most of that night. Fast forward 7 weeks later I notice signs of pregnancy but didn’t get an ultrasound until 9 weeks in the pregnancy. At the time, I thought it was my boyfriend (it would be impossible to be anyone else’s as I’ve been exclusive with him) but the timeline she gave me didn’t match with the times by boyfriend came out to see me. In fact, she was about 2 weeks off and I assumed it must’ve been a mistake. It wasn’t until I spoke to another friend about this and she mentioned to me that 9… Continue reading »

A Lifetime of pain

I have had many experiences with attempted rape before I experienced an actual date rape. It first started as a young child where a family friend would wake me to perform oral sex on him. There was an incident at my school where a cousin of a good friend on two occasions molested me in a lonesome classroom, then one day he tried to rape me, before I knew what was happening to me I was on a bench with my skirt pushed up while he is over me unbuckling his belt, but stopped when he heard footsteps coming down the hallway. My ex, the first guy to take my virginity would use sex as a punishment by applying pain and force. An old friend of mine had a crush on me and so did I, but then one day things got a little out of hand and the next minute I was running for… Continue reading »

Short Story

Skipping the details, my first High School boyfriend got tired of going slow, and forced himself on me during a date. I told most of my friends that it happened. Forewarned, on dates, two of my close friends were wary of him, and avoided the same fate. At least, breaking Silence saved a few more Shared Stories. — Survivor, age 19

Junior Prom

Asked out to Junior Prom is supposed to be Great, am I wrong? This guy was not my choice, and I mainly went to, basically Go. I was in a new dress, hair, and lots of make-up. We had a dismal time there. He said a lot of creepy things. I mostly hung out with the girls. Pretty much we were in the same room. His only advantage as a man was he had a car, and it was a long ride from my house there, and a longer one to go home after! He stopped in the lot of some closed stores. He demanded to make out for his trouble! He thought that was his right, because traditionally you were supposed to lose your virginity at the Junior Prom! I pointed out that was the Prom, it’s not a Requirement, and I am not a…..Interested. He leaned over to kiss me, and I kissed… Continue reading »

Was it rape?

My boyfriend and I are both 17. One night i threw a party at my house. There was obviously drinking and lots of people. My boyfriend never drinks so he’s never gotten drunk before. We were both drunk and fooling around in my room alone. I was fine doing whatever as long as my underwear stayed on. When we’re sober he’s really nice and constantly asks me if I’m comfortable and stuff but this time he was pressuring me to take them off. Giving in the the pressure I took them off. As a joke my friend brought a condom so he started looking for it in my room then put it on. Since i was very drunk i don’t remember 100% what i said but I’m pretty sure i said that i didn’t want to have sex and said no lots. He kept on saying something like come on you’ll never know if you… Continue reading »

Sharing #MeToo’s

We have been discussing the #MeToo campaign, and we each found a disturbing trend to have experienced something. We resolved to Share or stories: I was dating every weekend once I went to college, after a high school of being the last call for every dance. I was careful about sexual assault, but no one tried. My friends discussed that I would just have the next date take it. I was too moral, or too scared to, take your favorite. I met an outgoing guy at a party, and then saw him again about a week later, and he asked me out. Of course, there was no reason not to go! We never made it to the movie, as he pulled me out of the car, and raped me in the parking lot! He was strong, and covered my mouth, and I saw no one heading for their cars, so he just had his way…. Continue reading »

Sexual Assault in my own bed

I was messing around with my ex. I know I shouldn’t have but my friends told me to have fun be a teenager. So I was doing just that. We were friends with benefits. Most of it was just kissing and touching. It was the day that my parents were gone. I invited him over. I knew that it was a booty call but I didn’t want to have sex I just wanted to mess around. I let him in and we went to my room. He took his shirt off and we started kissing. When he reaches for my boobs I told him no. That I don’t want to have sex. He didn’t want to hear anything I said. Next thing I know I am laying on the bed with his crushing weight on top of me. I remember every little detail. From his weight on me to the feeling of his tongue down… Continue reading »

Rape

The Closet K.M.B. It was 1986. I was 19. I had a fake I.D. that I bought from the back of The Rolling Stone magazine. I was obsessed with Samantha Fox’s song, “Touch Me”. It was also the year that I was raped in a closet, in my hometown. It was a chilly Friday night in November. My best friend and I had decided to go out earlier than normal. We had hoped to be back in a few hours and catch Miami Vice. She had the young girl infatuation on Tubbs. I had one on Crockett. We entered one of our favorite bars and I was immediately approached by a man I had never seen before. In hindsight, this should have been a red flag. Our town was small and we knew virtually everyone. He told me his name was Guy. He said he had come down for the weekend to join some buddies… Continue reading »

Twice

At school I was never taught about consent. I never actually realised to the extent of how little respect that society has for women and their bodies till the day my recent ex boyfriend told me that I was my fault that I was raped, because I didn’t stop it. I shouldn’t have to use brute force to stop a boy from penetrating me when I already told him no. A 17 year old girl who was never taught about consent didn’t realise at the time that rape isn’t the glamorised being pinned down in a dark alley way by a strange scary pervert at night. It is in fact that drunk boy at a party who was pushy. Part of me did think at that time that it was my fault I wasn’t aggressive enough towards him to stop. That is wrong in so many ways. I own my own body so I should… Continue reading »

Time To Tell

February 21st, 2017 . I (15) got into a friends car(17) . he was high as a kite. we drove through my town just fooling around like teens do. we went down this road i asked him to turn around and take me home because i had a strange feeling. he said everything was fine not to worry. The road was a dead end. he parked the car and we were making out, he asked if i wanted to have sex i said no. He then pinned me down to the seat, i couldn’t move, i froze. i was screaming,yelling; “Please stop” “i don’t want to”. he didn’t listen. after that he took me home. i got ready for a cheer event and went as everything was normal. It wasn’t till a few days later it finally hit me , what had happened but by then it was too late. he has done it to… Continue reading »