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Blog Post – November 1st, 2010

I’m about to travel for the film for the first time in a year, since we went to South Africa. It’s hard for me to travel for the film. Not only because of law school, and leaving my family, but traveling has always been hard for me. Ever since Milan, I don’t like to be away from home. I think it brings up the trauma of being alone in Italy when I was raped. I don’t like to sleep in hotels. I have to leave the lights on at night. Some of these things, you never get over. You just have to live with them. Even though I haven’t been speaking internationally in the last year, a lot has happened. I’m in my second year of law school. I’m doing well in school and have been offered an internship at the Attorney General’s office when I graduate. I hope to be able to do a… Continue reading »

Thoughts about my trip to NY & NJ and what’s next…

I’ve been wanting to write since I was in New York. I flew back to Israel at the end of April to finish my first year of law school. I’m almost done with my exams and I’ve never worked so hard in my life! New York was my first international trip to meet with rape survivors and talk about rape. Meeting with all the women who came forward was incredible. We all share the same pain, the same thoughts and the same almost everything. The only difference is that every woman is dealing with it in a different way. For many of them, it’s very complicated, and I just see it as a crime. I don’t think it has to be easy, it has to be hard. It was a very traumatic experience. But I definitely cannot understand the shame associated with it.. How can you feel ashamed, for what? I understand where it comes… Continue reading »

Upcoming Press Conference

On Friday, December 12th, the day before the Miss World 2008 Finals in Johannesburg, I will be announcing my documentary project and officially launching this website. Here is a sneak peek at my statement for the press conference: I’m a survivor of rape. I was raped in Milan, Italy, when I was 18 years old, just seven weeks before the Miss World contest. My memory of the competition is of feeling barely alive. I don’t know how I got through it. During the four weeks in the Seychelles Islands, I did not tell anyone about my rape. Not the other girls, not the judges. I did not know how to begin talking about what happened. I was confused, scared and traumatized. The only people who knew the truth were my immediate family. When my name was announced as the winner, I was completely shocked. I thought I was the least fitting of all the contestants… Continue reading »