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A horror that lasts a lifetime

When I was 21 I was kidnapped, held in a small space, beaten, tortured and repeatedly raped. At one point I must have left my body because I looked down on what was happening and told myself that I was going to be killed if I didn’t figure out what to do to get free. I talked my way out of being killed, I had the rapest drive me to a bus station, got the people behind the ticket counter to save me, call the police and they arrested the rapest. Then I was tortured again, this time by the non caring police and doctors, which were all men. I had to stand on a platform so pictures could be taken of my cuts and bruises, try to picture a 21 year old girl who was just kidnapped, tortured and raped having to stand, naked, in front of men so they could take pictures of… Continue reading »

Keeping Faith

I was recently kidnapped and kept in a room where a man repeatedly drugged and raped me. He told me to do everything he said and he would let me go. Blindfolded, with my hands tied behind my back, I did. I prayed so hard and asked God not to leave my side. It is so hard getting my life together. I can fake it very well but my heart, soul and mind are torn. This movie repeating in my head will never go away. I understand that. I just wish this man would have never interrupted my life. I just feel like everything was taken from me. I feel alone and just set off now. Paranoid all the time. I don’t want to go to counseling because I don’t want to feel like a victim. I spoke up and have to go through a lot. He is out on bond and it’s talking it’s… Continue reading »

How Brave Miss World Changed My Life

Brave Miss World was screened at my college’s annual film festival last year. I saw the film as a class requirement- I did not know much about it beforehand. The next 90 minutes or so changed my life. I was so deeply moved by Linor’s story. My heart was broken into a thousand pieces. All I wanted to do was help in some way, so I immediately returned to my dorm and donated money to the film. That was in February. Three months later, I was raped. It was strange- rape is something you often read about or hear about on the news, but you never think it will happen to you. But we are all equally vulnerable. It can happen to anyone. Bad things often happen to good people and there is no explanation. I was out with friends and excused myself to use the restroom. On my way back to our table, a… Continue reading »

my story-and where i “took it”…

My story begins when I was 5 or 6…. my parents best friends had a son a few years older than me…. at some point he started molesting me… every time his parents came over or we went over to their house… it started out “easy”.. like he would only touch etc… but than at some poing he started using objects …. i remember i used to watch the floor and pretend all the shapes on it were animals (i was mostly on my stomach)… one day.. my brother came in and “caught us”… he was not all that older than me…. about 2 and a half years… and instead of saying something… he just thought it was a “nice game” and started doing the same…. it went on like that till i was about 12.. and it gradually stoped… no specific reason….than i was blessed with a whole 3 years of freedom…when i was… Continue reading »

intruder

One evening in June about a year ago, I went to bed without checking my tempermental back door lock. I got into bed and heard a noise like a magazine falling to the floor….and attributed it to one of my many cats. One of my cats, Shanti raised her head and staired at the bedroom doorway. I disregarded her even when she began to growl. Finally after a few minutes I got up from my bed and put my bathrobe on. As I ventured into the hallway to prove to Shanti that nothing was wrong I saw the figure of a man at the other end of the hallway. He said to me ” I want you.” I couldn’t believe this was real as I also realized he was half naked from the waist down. I shouted ” Get out of my house!” He came towards me and I tried to run away but was… Continue reading »

two years ago

two years ago i came home from a club in paris, and took the nightbus, suddenly a few guys started making fun of me, i dropped my earphones and said: ok enough! than the one guy stood up and started beating me, at first nobody in the bus helped me, so i got really hurt finally a man stood up and i ran towards the busdriver, but he really didnt care, he just wanted me to leave the bus, when i got out of the bus i didnt recognize the guy had also left the bus at the same station, i started walking when i feld him push my arm and and trying to pull me, i was extremely scared and had pain everywhere

עדיין מציק

וואו אני לא יודעת מאיפה להתחיל עברתי 3 מקרים וזה עדיין מציק אני בת 31 אמא ל2 ילדי מקסימים כשהייתי בת בערך 15 ליוויתי את חברה שלי הבייתה דרך איזו סימטה מוארת לפתע שמענו שמישהו הולך אחרינו הגברנו את קצב ההליכה וגם הוא הגביר ומכיוון שאני הייתי הכי קרובה אליו הוא תפס אותי וניסה לגרור אותי לשיחים תוך כדי שהוא אומר שהוא רוצה סליחה על הביטוי להזדיין איתי התנגדתי לו והתחלתי לצעוק הוא מושך אותי מצד אחד וחברה שלי מצד שני הוא ראה שאני צועקת אז הוא התחיל להרביץ לי כנראה שהוא נבהל מהצרחה וברח נכנסתי להלם חברה שלי הלכה לשכנים שגרו ליד וביקשה מהם להזעיק את המשטרה המשטרה הגיעה ולקחה אותי לעשות איתם סיבוב בעיר כדי לראות אם אני מזהה אותו כמובן שאת הפנים שלו לא יכולתי לשכוח הוא היה ערבי מבוגר ומפחיד לאחר מכן נסענו לתחנת המשטרה והתקשרו להורים שלי מכיוון שהייתי קטינה ההורים שלי נבהלו ומיד הגיעו לאחר כשעה הגיע חוקר שהראה… Continue reading »

Do I say thank you?

I was not sure if I was ready to talk about that night. I haven’t really shared details with very many people. It was my deceased mom’s birthday and I was over my aunts house for a mini celebration. I went to visit one of my friends at Applebee’s. Then it happened. I was abducted. In my own car. silly me not to lock the doors after I got in. I was told to get over and not say a word. I will not get into details but we drove around for what felt like hours. Then he stopped at what used to be one of my favorite parks. I was raped. When he was done he made me drive him home. Can you believe that? I did not know it was his home at first. I found that out later on. I was really out of it and could not remember where i dropped… Continue reading »