Let me start my story as my experience is a little non typical, and I feel for those who had a harder fate, as I got very lucky. Most who I tell this to take it well, it was a learning experience!
I made an incredible mistake! I walked to my car in the lot, and stood there several minutes digging in the bottom of my purse for the keys, absolutely oblivious to my surroundings(you take out the keys before you leave a public crowded area), and though I must have done this often this was THE time it was bad!
He came up unseen, put a gun to my head, hand over my mouth, and bodily dragged me down an access corridor and into a janitor closet! He pushed me inside and locked the door. I had every concept of exactly what we were there for! All that ran through my mind was I was about to become a chalk outline, a top story on the News, and a based on actual facts on SUV! I was so nervous that I couldn’t remember the words to my prayers! I did not know my heart could beat so hard or fast and survive.
The man was dirty, unshaven, stank up the room, and while he had the gun on me, he ordered me to the floor, and he pulled himself out and began to stoke it.
Can I phrase it as he was not locked and in the upright position?
Furious effort seemed for naught! He had me remove my top things, and achieved no improvement.
Allow me to leave the events reduced to that he had me go through several foreplay activities. All wasted effort!
Excuse me, but I never felt so [censored] inadequate in my life!
Frustrated he left me there, with my clothing, purse, and virtue(ha ha) intact! I sat for a few minutes, and then I let all my emotions pour out! I started to laugh my head off! I felt totally dejected that I wasn’t pretty enough! Was it that I was more repulsive than this individual?
I called the police while I redressed. I waited in my car for some time thinking about how I had failed to achieve what he arranged for us. The first patrolman arrived to take my statement, and he had to be a supportive, trained professional, dispassionately writing every detail, though slightly off put. He asked if I wanted to go to the hospital, or had any family I wanted to inform. When his partner got there, he excused himself to discuss, and tag out so the second officer could take over. You see, I caught him walking away, choking back a minor case of the giggles!
The second patrolman was equally a professional, taking my statement, until the sergeant arrived. She was a trained specialist, who greeted me, reassured me, asked if I needed anything, and all. She asked if I needed a hug, and said I could let it all out.
I did, I started laughing out loud! She couldn’t help joining me!
“It happens to a lot of guys!”, she said.
“This has never happened to me before!” I said.
“Maybe he was working too hard,” she said.
“it’s stress.” I said.
“Perhaps you could have waited 20 minutes and try again?” she said.
“It’s not you it’s me.” I said.
I had forgotten the rape attempt, the activities I did do, that I could have been killed, my own insecurities and all. I followed the sergeant to her station to make sketches, look at pictures, sign papers, and get the packet of pamphlets.
They did arrest the guy months later on other charges, but there wasn’t enough evidence for my case. I am told several officers walked into his cell, and left laughing at him! I changed garages, and set up an escort board for my workplace, and did a short-term on victim’s hotline, though my schedule precluded the commitment, I left myself as a reference and support.
I hope I can bring a little lightness to an otherwise terrible experience. I leave each victim my Love, Prayers, and Wishes for their Recovery.
Forever with You,