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August 29th, 2020

Why you should talk to your daughters...

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At 16 I began dating my first serious boyfriend. I kept it a secret from my mom since she made it feel like I couldn’t talk to her about anything, love, sex, school, nothing. I had recently turned 16 and he was 17 at the time. We went to the...
December 10th, 2019

Raped by stranger x2

2
In my 2nd rape when I was 20 yrs old, I went into shock during and after the assault. Afterwards, my body shook for hours, but I tried to act normal in front of people. I felt like I was dreaming – everything and everyone seemed unreal. But, I also...
May 12th, 2019

Too good to be true

2
I met him in a gas station and he impressed me mostly because he approached me and seemed genuinely interested in the bond between my daughter and I. Within a couple of weeks we were texting, calling and FaceTiming each other constantly. When he asked me on a first date...
August 17th, 2019

My/our German “Weinstein” Case

6
My name is Jany Tempel. I live both in Germany and Thailand. I turned public now, to end the big silence of our country. Almost twenty years ago I had already written a novel about my arduous life. The book wasn’t published back then, mainly because I reported on crimes...
April 18th, 2019

My husband raped me when I took...

2
I just want him to be sorry and get help.
June 24th, 2020

Too naïve

3
I was 16. I had my first job, a lifeguard. I was so excited. I have been a swimmer since I was 5 so this was a very fitting job for me. I was the youngest person working there by far. Most of the kids were in college and one...
March 17th, 2023

Indigo

I returned to fine art in 1990 when I took at class in indigo dyeing at San Francisco State University. I was lucky that the instructor, Yoshiko Wada, and another student from her class, were in the East Bay so that we could carpool together. We would talk textiles on our weekly journey across the Bay Bridge to the Campus. The other student was an accomplished Quilter named Linda MacDonald. Linda lived in Willits near the famous Mendocino Art Center, but traveled to Berkeley to attend this class once a week. The Indigo vat was made in a 32-gallon garbage can and had to be kept covered between dyeing sessions. Indigo is a unique rich blue dye that develops with an oxidization process when exposed to air. Dipping the fabric several times, and allowing the natural fiber to oxidize before dipping it again, creates darker shades of blue. The dye in the vat is created from a mixture of indigo pigment, various chemicals and a reducing agent to remove oxygen from the dye. It is a rich green color while in the vat, which shows up on the fabric before it is fully exposed to the air. The smell emitted from the dye is unusual, a musky odor in my mind. I like to think that it smells like the color blue. The vat needs to be carefully stirred and maintained between dyeing sessions. There is a “bloom” on the top of the vat created by oxidized indigo, making a bubbly and shiny ball of material reminiscent of a flower. The “bloom” gets moved to the side before entry of the pre-wetted fabric. The process reminds me of baking bread or making yogurt where the steps need to be carefully followed to achieve the desired results. In the process of bread and yogurt making, there are living cultures involved in order to create the product, and with the creation and dyeing process of indigo, it has that same feeling of being alive. In order to create interesting patterns, my classmates and I would use resist techniques on the fabric like pastes, stitching and clamping. Simple household items like clothespins could be used to create patterns by folding and then placing the pins at intervals along the fold lines. Beautiful and surprising results were achieved using these methods. Image of Indigo dye on fabric during the oxidization process. My dream of being a professional artist, all started in early childhood, and the first memories of my creations go back to Nursery School. I loved playing with all kinds of materials, like paint, clay, and crayons, just to name a few examples. Mel (Melanie), painting at Jack and Jill Nursery School, Walnut Creek, California, 1960. In 1974, a neighbor in Marin where I was living at the time and studying art at College of Marin told me about an Art School in Mexico. I ended up sending off slides of my work with an application to the Instituto Allende, and was delighted to hear that I was accepted. I began my journey to study there in San Miguel de Allende by flying to Mexico City in January of 1975. A bus ride completed that journey. When I first arrived, I moved in with a family who had two small children, including a newborn. It seemed like a safe living situation for a 19-year-old woman, but that shortly proved to not be true when the husband started coming on to me. I ended up finding my own place on the other side of town. It was a spacious abode with a wall that was shared with a weaving factory next door. There were 2 adjoined bedrooms, a bathroom, a large living/kitchen area and a small concrete patio out the back door. There was no hot water, refrigerator or a telephone. When I needed hot water for dishes, I would boil some on the stove. For showers, I had to build a fire in a box below a water tank outside to get hot water. I felt much more secure living there and walking a further distance to the Instituto on the other side of town than living with the husband who had made me feel so unsafe. There was the Central Plaza, which was called the “Jardin” that was in the middle of town, and I would pass through it on my walk quite frequently. This was the site of fireworks and festivals, like the celebration of Cinco de Mayo. The streets were cobblestone and many charming shops and galleries were located downtown. The School itself was on a beautiful campus with large ornate doors in front that were closed when school was not in session. Photo of the closed front doors of the Instituto Allende I had heard about you and what you had done to other women before you appeared in my main living space one sunny spring afternoon pointing a gun at me. You had a bandana wrapped around your face and tied behind your head. I had heard you first, in the bathroom. Dressed in a long polyester dress with colorful psychedelic patterns. I wasn’t wearing any underwear or shoes. I walked through the 2 bedrooms and turned left when I saw you standing there. I screamed and shouted, “help me,” thinking that workers at the Weaving Factory would hear me and come rescue me. Nobody came. You said to me “Coyote” which I later learned meant to be quiet or to shut up. You grabbed my shoulders and dragged me out the unlocked back door onto the concrete patio. The tops of my feet got scraped. I gave up. I knew you were going to rape me. I just wanted you to finish as quickly as possible. You took off your belt and put down your gun. Somehow I managed to pick up your gun and threw it over the wall embedded with glass on the top, into the alleyway. The same wall you had climbed over to get into my place through the unlocked back door. Towards the end of this ordeal, I heard a knock on my door. You left, climbing back over the wall. I answered the door. My friend Rhonda had come by to visit me. I told her what had happened and we walked to the Police Station nearby. I had your belt with me. The one you left behind. I went to the front counter, telling the officers behind the counter what had happened to me. They were laughing and playing cards at the time. I showed them your belt. They told me to bring you in if I saw you again. I left with Rhonda and took a bath at the where place she lived. We didn’t talk about what happened. We moved in together shortly after that. I sent a telegram to my father and stepmother about what had happened to me. Nobody came to help me. Rhonda helped me when I got hepatitis A and could no longer go to school. I was on my own when it came to figuring out how to return to the Bay Area. I moved in with my father and stepmother. They didn’t talk to me about what happened to me. They sent me to a doctor who diagnosed me with type 1 diabetes. He showed me how to give myself insulin injections. He told me to practice by injecting oranges with empty syringes. My mother told me years later that “You were never the same again” after what you did to me. I survived. I gave up art for 15 years before realizing that I wanted to go back to art school. In those years, I became so disturbed that I had panic attacks, deep depression and needed to move in with my mother at age 30. I started therapy after becoming self destructive in my 20’s. Depression also called “the blues” has been my long time companion. It has taken me a lifetime to heal. My iPhone predicts the words, depression, PTSD and C-PTSD for my text messages. After my Indigo dyeing class at San Francisco State, I enrolled in the Textiles Fine Art program at California College of Arts and Crafts (now known as California College of the Arts) in Oakland. I was married at the time and had become pregnant with our daughter Emily right before classes started in September. Emily was born on May 13, 1991. By the Fall of 1992, I was a single mom and an art student. An inheritance from my mother who died in 1995, allowed me to graduate and to buy my first home. I continued to work with indigo dyeing and created a large textile piece about my experience in Mexico. After many years of therapy and other healing modalities, I recently started painting on canvas. Part of that process has been a Soul Retrieval session to bring back my 4 year old self who loved to paint. I am feeling uplifted and encouraged after many years of recurring periods of severe emotional pain. Stay tuned for more details about my new work. One of my final pieces was a textile called “Out of the Blues.”
1
I returned to fine art in 1990 when I took at class in indigo dyeing at San Francisco State University. I was lucky that the instructor, Yoshiko Wada, and another student from her class, were in the East Bay so that we could carpool together. We would talk textiles on...
August 10th, 2014

Halloween Nightmare

1
I was raped at the age of 22 while in college. It was my senior year and all I was looking forward to was running well and making the grades in school. I was on the varsity cross country and track team for my university and when October came it...
October 7th, 2019

Drugged

4
..I had gone to a concert with some friends at a smaller venue. One of my friends knew one of the guys in the band so we were kind of hanging out with the band, etc. They invited us up to the bus. I remember the tour manager handing me...
April 20th, 2019

At 17yr old was raped by my...

2
I became pregnant at age 16, forced to marry months later at 17, I went through domestic violence, physical abuse, mental abuse, sexual abuse by him, my husband and my family did nothing to help me out of the nightmare! After 2 yrs I got out with the help of...
September 13th, 2019

He was right

1
I was dating this older man for about over 3 months and I was very happy with this person and we made so much happy memories in such a short time but long story short it just did not work out. He did not want to break up but I...
December 5th, 2020

Constant fear

2
Does he know he destroyed me? Does he know that have a “normal relationship” for 2 years because of him? Does he know that he made me lose weed little confidence I had? Or that I still have nightmares of what you did to me? Does he know that even...
June 8th, 2023

Unethical or illegal?

1
Last year my partner and I worked for the same business. It was a small business near a small town and it had no management or HR of any sort – only one man owned and ran it, even though it served thousands of people each year. I hit it...
May 8th, 2019

UNEXPOSED – AFTER 30 YEARS OF EXTREME...

2
Molestation 4-13, dissociation syndrome started, afraid 24/7, PTSD 10, black outs began & were triggered by the smell of certain foods or a male authorities voice. Attempted Rape 15, Physical Abuse 16-31, all my ex-boyfriends. Rape 18, also attempted suicide & started dancing because I needed extra money & no...
September 16th, 2019

I didn’t know it was rape, I...

2
As I sit here watching brave miss world on Netflix I am sobbing. Maybe I’m not alone, probably I am. I was raped by a boy I had a crush on when I was 16. I had drank a glass of wine which had been drugged so even still today...
February 13th, 2020

Start of grooming at 15

2
When I was around 11 years old my parents and I moved to a new house. It was a lovely time. A neighbour of ours who was very friendly with the rest of our neighbourhood as first was kind. People always said he was very charming. Walking home from school...
May 24th, 2019

The Statistics that Changed Me

2
2 sexual assaults and 1 rape… the statistics of my story. I can’t promise that this story is pleasant, but I can tell you that power and growth comes with telling it. So sincerely, thank you for hearing me out. October 2017 I was in Chebut, Argentina(a part of the...
January 27th, 2024

Blamed myself …

1
I got raped multiple times. I got sexually assaulted multiple times. I blamed myself. I saved a lot of women from being raped even men and when I was being sa and raped. no one saved me till today. I go outside and see the people who did it to...
June 15th, 2019

Men get raped too…

2
When I was 17, I was raped by a man who was in his 50’s after boxing training. Couple days later I tried to lie to myself and say that everything was fine but it wasn’t. Therefore I told my brothers girlfriend. At first she believed me and asked to...
February 13th, 2024

1 hour 3 days

1
Before you decide to read my journey can I ask that you keep the title 1 hour/ 3 days in the back of your mind? I decided to write about my journey as a survivor of rape and sexual assault to ensure that people are aware of what happens as...
July 10th, 2019

So drunk I can’t remember

4
I was turning 18. I was partying like any teen would. I drank a lot. I threw up, sat down. They picked me up and put me in their car. They said “don’t worry we’ll take care of you. You won’t miss the bus”. I remember lying on the bed...
June 18th, 2019

My best friends dad

2
April 27th 2018. Two weeks prior to this incident I was in Longleaf psychiatric facility. I took over 300 pills cuz I didn’t want to be alive anymore but little did I know the worst was yet to come. Ironically when I decided to take all the pills I called...
April 27th, 2019

Everyone Else Likes You, Too

2
I had never been to a bar before. Sure, I’d gone out to Applebees with other coworkers where they’d serve me drinks. But I was 19, and had to drive home. I had never been drunk before, and didn’t push my limits. I went to the bar to see him...
January 4th, 2020

David and Goliath

2
Shalom. We’ve got 2 things in common, dear brave Linor. A fight and faith. Except my abuser is my father, an ex minister of my country, ambassador and politician. Meaning he’s had everybody in his hands. And therefore he easily had me committed to a hospital after I first time...
July 22nd, 2022

This is my story

2
It was April 1st, 2012; I was 6 years old. I went to my aunts house (Moms side) to play with my cousins. I do recall being there was not the best time of my life. She told me to go into the back room with her; she then proceeded...
January 2nd, 2016

It Was the Second

1
This story may not be relevant. But when I was 11 yrs old, I was almost raped by my aunt’s, husbands, uncle. I had such an uncomfortable feeling when I was around him…. well, I’ll just get to the point. He was a guest, so my aunt asked me to...
August 18th, 2019

Abusée par un voisin de mes grands...

2
Bonjour chère Linor, Je suis en train de regarder Brave Miss World. Merci! Je témoigne car j’en ai peu parlé dans ma vie. J’avais 4 ou 5 ans. Je vivais avec mes grands-parents et ils me posaient parfois le samedi chez la voisine qui me gardait pour aller à un...
April 9th, 2020

People don’t think your spouse can rape...

1
6 months ago my husband forced me to have sex with him because it was his birthday and he deserved it. Even after repeatedly telling him no, I was forced to comply with his request. I felt dirty after that. Like my marriage had been deviled. I went into a...
September 18th, 2019

Raped in the Air Force

2
My first duty stationed 28 years ago, i was sexually assaulted by my first supervisor and violently raped by an officer in my unit. The violence of that raped, ruined me for a long time. Suffer from severe PTSD and after 31 years i am being forced out of the...
December 5th, 2020

Summer 2019

1
I got my first job working at a lovely Mediterranean restaurant/cafe one summer because my teacher said she knew the man who ran the place and put in a reference for me. I was 15. He was in his 60s. Two days after I started, the groping began. Only he...
March 5th, 2024

My step dad raped me

1
I would have never imagined the person who I praised and idolised could have ever hurt me this much. An individual who I adored more than I could have anyone. A parent is a person whose sole purpose is to provide, care for and show love to their child. A...
December 13th, 2021

He was my best friend

2
He was my best friend of 8 years. I was really leaning on him for support as I had just experienced my first sexual assault like 6 months beforehand. I was really struggling mentally so he offered to take me out for a night and we went into the city...
November 23rd, 2014

Still Unable to Tell People

0
What I remember from that night is feeling flattered that someone older was paying attention. I was underage in a bar. I don’t remember much after that except three men carrying me into a motel room, all at least ten years older. One was the owner of the bar, who...
November 11th, 2016

Let’s Fight Back With Love

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Hi fellow survivors. The recent posts I am seeing on this site sadden me because we are all strong survivors and we should try to always remember this. I know like me, many of you are still having a hard time processing that a man who is so clearly a...
November 2nd, 2020

When does it get easier?

1
I was already a troubled kid. My mother was an alcoholic and we moved at least once a year. New schools, new friends, new environment… it’s hard to get to know yourself let alone anyone else, with no stability. My mother fell for any and everyone. Typical chain of events…...
March 12th, 2016

Hurt and Anger

5
I was 9 years old when it all started, my mom started working in a new restaurant and would leave at 5am and come back at 3pm, and my “father” didn’t work for he had a lawsuit that didn’t let him work. It was random when my “father” started to...
May 18th, 2019

We were drunk

1
I still hear a nagging voice in my head telling me the way I feel isn’t valid. I was at a party with my friends from home over break from college. I carpooled with a guy I would have easily called my best friend at the time. We were extremely...
December 9th, 2023

Raped by my boyfriend

1
It was a cold night in 2019 I was at a party while on FaceTime arguing with my on again off again boyfriend of 3 years I was at the party and told my friend I wanted to leave. I was not feeling well she said ok. Little did I...
December 26th, 2019

Ms.

2
I was raped by a co-worker when I was in my mid-20’s. We were at a work function, we were all drinking, then about 10 of us went to his place to continue the party. He grabbed me on my way out of the washroom and dragged me into his...
October 15th, 2022

Male dancer

1
Hello my Name is Tj. This happen about 4 years ago I was 19 years old at very young age I always tried to see the good in people. I was always happy and felt nothing could break me down went threw cancer as a baby lost my brother and...
September 15th, 2019

Online Dangers

1
I had an online friend named Brandon, and he was shockingly nice. I was around 14 at the time. We decided to meet up because he was the town over and i could walk there. So I walked to his house and we got to know eachother. At one point,...
June 1st, 2019

The Life I Live

4
When I was 7 my cousin started touch me. He was older and he said it was okay we were practicing. I wasn’t sure what he meant. This went on for 3 years. He would touch my body and claimed it was his. He said it was a way to...
February 12th, 2022

House help and cousin

1
Few years ago I suddenly got a flashback to when I was around 4~5 years old. I come from a joint family system with lots of family members living in the same house. Me and my cousins used to play house growing up. So when the house help( 18~20 years...
August 10th, 2014

Halloween Nightmare

1
I was raped at the age of 22 while in college. It was my senior year and all I was looking forward to was running well and making the grades in school. I was on the varsity cross country and track team for my university and when October came it...
November 11th, 2020

I think I was raped

2
I don’t know what to do or what to say. I haven’t told anybody because I don’t even truly know what happened. This weekend I was drinking at a friend’s house. I didn’t drink a ton- one beer and one mixed drink that was in a gallon jug in his...
January 15th, 2021

my grandmas friend’s son raped me

1
When I was three, I was raped by my Grandma’s friends son and I found my way out the entire time his mom was in the shower with the door shut and locked. she had music playing and I cried and cried and cried. I was only three at the...
January 18th, 2020

Log

1
Last days I´ve gone thru by PSTD, I can´t stand the voices or people around. I can´t figure out how twenty years has passed in front of my eyes, and they were closed for the fear. Fear have lead my live. And in my “good years” I remember just few...
May 1st, 2021

Friend of my Husband

3
About 2 weeks ago, Arthur, who works with my husband, came over looking for him, but Carl was out at a car show for the afternoon, which I told him. I was working on the dishes and cleaning the counter when he grabbed my arms and wrestled me to the...
April 1st, 2021

Sex doll

1
After work one night I was drugged by a co-worker. I woke up in his bed naked. He was not in the room. I felt 2 emotions very heavily and immediately. Shame and wrong. I remember looking around for my clothes in a panic. I don’t remember how I got...
May 14th, 2021

16 and 45

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so im a boy and a met this girl when i was 16/15 ish and she was like 45 or something. anyway we met at a party and she was all over me kissing me. and as a 16 year old boy i thought it was cool and we started...
June 11th, 2020

Afraid, Ashamed and Alone

2
It was a family member. I was sleeping over at their house because my mom had to get a cancerous spot removed on the back of her head. He touched me. He continued to touch me. And i just froze up. The next day, I tried to act like everything...
October 21st, 2019

Miss

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My story is about how I was abused at the age of 9 till the age of 13 by a close family member, and how much this destroyed my life , it was a trauma as a child, it was intense
July 3rd, 2020

The pain that was never mine to...

1
I was a freshman in college. It was first semester and I was there for maybe about a month. One night my friends and I went to a party. As we were there, I started talking to a guy and eventually went back to his appt.  Once we were in...
April 21st, 2021

A respectable collegue

1
The next day I walked down the stairs to the hotel, aware that he was sitting at the table having breakfast. Some things you think would never happen to you, you think that working externally with a colleague (married and with children) is not dangerous. But then in a moment...
October 12th, 2023

Workplace Sexual Harassment

1
As I write this story to you, please note that this sexual harassment case is still in progress. It began in December of 2022 when I worked as a contractor for a company named TEKsystems. I do IT work for Nutrien Ag Solutions. The first week I was there, I...
May 23rd, 2021

Rape in my locked home

1
I have been raped numerous times in homes that are locked. I am divorced and live alone. Obviously drugged as no memories. The first time in my locked home after my divorce when I broke up with someone who admitted after dating him for months that he used to do...
July 2nd, 2019

She was 5 years old

2
I was four years old and was at a family reunion where I went to play with my female, five year old cousin. I knew something was wrong when she had the door locked from the outside by her brother and told me that I couldn’t tell anyone what we...
February 4th, 2021

Raped at the Air Force Academy

2
In 2002 I was appointed to the Air Force Academy Preparatory School in Colorado Springs, CO. The prep school was a sort of booster school for people who wanted to be at the Academy but fell short of their appointment. It could have been due to grades, SAT/ACT scores, athletics,...
July 29th, 2013

Why: A Poem About My Rape

0
Soothe my whys with soft whispers Wipe my tears with your love Make me whole again No more, I beg No more No more Unwanted touch Unwelcomed Stiff, rough caresses No man to hold me down, Give me forbidden kisses Legs forced apart Like rusty hinges Hinges to a door...
September 8th, 2019

Frozen in fear

2
I thank you for your story. I have kept silent about all my traumas for most of my life. In the last 2 years I have started my healing journey and still have a hard time sharing with anyone but my therapist. I mostly have shamed myself because of how...
June 26th, 2022

My survival story

1
When I was 15 I knew I had to get out of home. My father had been abusing my mum and siblings for as long as I could remember, both physically and verbally, and it was getting worse by the day. So at 15 I decided to break up with...
January 15th, 2021

not the typical rape

2
I spend the whole night reading the stories of all those brave people as a way to understand what happened to me 3 years ago. I was 15 I was drunk and naive. He told me that he was going to put me to bed and as I lied down...
February 2nd, 2023

He was family

0
I was so young can’t even properly remember his face well at least how it looks now since he’s grown up he was 6years older I was 7-9. He used to come to our house to stay my cousin. I don’t think he was actually my cousin just called that...
August 30th, 2019

My story growing up with a secret

2
I’m a black South African, I’m 40 years old now, and my son it 20 years old… loved, taught but I still can never live him alone with my nieces as I was left alone and violeted💔💔😭😭 I have spoken about this, but I hate putting this down in writting😭😭...
June 19th, 2022

I didn’t even know I was pregnant

1
When I was thirteen I had one friend. I had a selective mutism and non-white in a very unsafe households, with a single absent mother who was debting, and I was bullied in school. I was already sexually abused every night by my biological father, and was constantly dissociated from...
February 13th, 2020

Start of grooming at 15

2
When I was around 11 years old my parents and I moved to a new house. It was a lovely time. A neighbour of ours who was very friendly with the rest of our neighbourhood as first was kind. People always said he was very charming. Walking home from school...
August 17th, 2019

My/our German “Weinstein” Case

6
My name is Jany Tempel. I live both in Germany and Thailand. I turned public now, to end the big silence of our country. Almost twenty years ago I had already written a novel about my arduous life. The book wasn’t published back then, mainly because I reported on crimes...
May 8th, 2019

Spoke out and was blamed

3
I am the only girl at a job of 4 men. I am also 20 while these men are 40+. One worker would grab me from behind when I would walk in the back to the bathroom. This would happen often. One day all my coworkers had to go outside...