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Naive College Freshman

I was only 18. I wanted to save myself for marriage, and had managed to make it through a year long high school romance without having sex. When I got to college, I started drinking a lot because I could and it was fun. I attended my first frat party before school had even begun and lost my virginity that night. After that, I decided that it didn’t matter anymore and I had a string of one night stands after frat parties. I neither consented nor denied, they just happened. But, one evening stands out from the rest. A guy that I was acquainted with invited me and a friend over for wine and a movie. I got pretty drunk. He may have slipped roofies into it, but I don’t know. What I do remember was coming in and out of consciousness as he forcefully kissed me and I turned my head away trying to break free. Then, I recall coming back to consciousness as he was on top of me having sex with my body. I leapt out of the bed and locked myself in the bathroom. I didn’t know then that it was rape. I always imagined rape being a sober, violent event. I wish I had known that it’s more often a result of scumbag men taking advantage of women who drink too much. I was so naive. I blamed myself for always drinking too much. Reading all of the recent rape stories in the news has helped me to realize that I too was raped. I will warn my daughters of the dangers of college parties – go with friends who will stick with you and never leave you alone. Have fun, but don’t get wasted. Never, ever leave with a guy that you just met. And, I will teach my son to be respectful of women.

— Survivor, age 36

1 comment

  • Alissa Ackerman


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