I was sexually abused by a close family ‘friend’. He was married with two children. He manipulated and ‘groomed’ me and my whole family into trusting him. The sexual advances towards me started around age 9 years old, and escalated over the years to follow.
After years of control and mind games, he raped me when I was 14. He was in his late 30’s. He made me believe it was my fault, I wanted it and that if I told I would brake up his family and send him to prison. I did not want this at the time and I felt so ashamed. I did not tell anyone for 2 years and when I did, I still felt I was to blame.
It took a year to get to crown court and about a week for him to be found not guilty. The police missed a lot of opportunities. They lost evidence, allowed him to get rid of his phone and computer and did not follow up any of the information I gave them on key witnesses. Other children that had witnessed the abuse and that were also abused (shown porn to, asked sexual questions etc.) did not come forward to support me. He made sure he scared them into being silent. I also told the police about his cousin who also sexually abused me and shared sexually explicit photographs with me and took of me. The police said that he was not important and he was not even questioned. Additionally, during the court case, when I gave evidence, I broke down and could not physically speak or stop crying. Therefore, I was unable to provide any sort or evidence. The prosecution also called me a fantasist, an attention seeker, and a liar. Also his wife called me a bitch in court and gave a false alibi.
I am now 24, and the man who abused and raped me is living his life happily with his wife and two children. His cousin is free and happy too. Whilst I am living with post traumatic stress and depression. I am hoping to also speak out and help others too. Thank you for providing me with a voice. As I feel I have never been given one.