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March 16th, 2015

It Was My Mom

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Most people don’t believe it because I’m a boy but it’s real and it hurts me. When I was 13, I got my first girlfriend. I really liked her and I introduced her to my mom. My mom acted really weird around her like she didn’t like her but I...
September 1st, 2019

My fiancé is my rapist but I...

4
I have a past of sexual abuse but for the most part I’ve put it behind me though I get flashbacks every so often when watching a triggering show or something. My problem currently is my fiancé. This isn’t a new development in our relationship this started since we started...
May 10th, 2019

I was raped for 3 years

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My uncle raped me for three years saying if i told anyone id be sent away and my family would hate me. It was repeated. It started when i was 13 and ended when i told on him when i was 16. My aunt called a lying whore and half...
December 5th, 2019

“It’s not your fault.”

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For the first 11 years of my life, I was raised and groomed as a sex toy, mostly for my male family members. However, my mother would also often trade me to other men for various things: drugs, money… love and affection. I have no idea how many times good-intentioned...
May 8th, 2019

UNEXPOSED – AFTER 30 YEARS OF EXTREME...

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Molestation 4-13, dissociation syndrome started, afraid 24/7, PTSD 10, black outs began & were triggered by the smell of certain foods or a male authorities voice. Attempted Rape 15, Physical Abuse 16-31, all my ex-boyfriends. Rape 18, also attempted suicide & started dancing because I needed extra money & no...
May 20th, 2019

Lied to left brain damged

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I was completely lied to and mislead . Can you can you believe a hospital would keep the fact that you were raped because of a negligence they caused my arm by putting a catheter in me. You see back in 2014 A co-worker male asked me to go out...
October 6th, 2021

My Mother was raped and told me...

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Back in 1983 my Mother got really drunk. She told me about the time when she was raped in Sept. of 1971. She went in explicit details about it/ In Feb of 1971 My father dissapeared. He was in the insurance buisness and got involved in white collar fraud and...
August 31st, 2020

Mrs.

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 Hi I was raped when I was 18. I am now 40 and been told I have post traumatic stress disorder. I had just broken up with my first love and I went on a night out in Liverpool, UK, I was drinking and ended up kissing a boy and...
August 6th, 2020

I regret not telling

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When I was in high school, I dated someone briefly. He never told anyone about me to his family or friends. I ended things after a month or two, because he was really into kissing and wanted to do more than that. I didn’t want that though as I was...
July 11th, 2022

i hate myself for thinking its my...

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it started when i was 6 i had a cousin and he had a game we would play he said it was a fun game and well unfortunately i didn’t know this back then by i know now that i was sexually abused back then he would touch me inappropriately...
June 12th, 2019

A story of a not so perfect...

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When I was growing up my grandfather molested me constantly. When I turned 9 my brother raped me for the first time and it continued until I was 12. My brother raped me 12 times over those 3 years. When I turned 12 I told my parents and they didn’t...
April 10th, 2023

My principal mom raped me

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When I was just ten years old my mom would remove my clothes then sexually assault me. it didn’t matter how much I cried as she did it. She only cared about what turned her on. :’( I’ve been quiet about it because she’s a principal at a school, but...
May 24th, 2019

The Statistics that Changed Me

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2 sexual assaults and 1 rape… the statistics of my story. I can’t promise that this story is pleasant, but I can tell you that power and growth comes with telling it. So sincerely, thank you for hearing me out. October 2017 I was in Chebut, Argentina(a part of the...
March 17th, 2023

Indigo

I returned to fine art in 1990 when I took at class in indigo dyeing at San Francisco State University. I was lucky that the instructor, Yoshiko Wada, and another student from her class, were in the East Bay so that we could carpool together. We would talk textiles on our weekly journey across the Bay Bridge to the Campus. The other student was an accomplished Quilter named Linda MacDonald. Linda lived in Willits near the famous Mendocino Art Center, but traveled to Berkeley to attend this class once a week. The Indigo vat was made in a 32-gallon garbage can and had to be kept covered between dyeing sessions. Indigo is a unique rich blue dye that develops with an oxidization process when exposed to air. Dipping the fabric several times, and allowing the natural fiber to oxidize before dipping it again, creates darker shades of blue. The dye in the vat is created from a mixture of indigo pigment, various chemicals and a reducing agent to remove oxygen from the dye. It is a rich green color while in the vat, which shows up on the fabric before it is fully exposed to the air. The smell emitted from the dye is unusual, a musky odor in my mind. I like to think that it smells like the color blue. The vat needs to be carefully stirred and maintained between dyeing sessions. There is a “bloom” on the top of the vat created by oxidized indigo, making a bubbly and shiny ball of material reminiscent of a flower. The “bloom” gets moved to the side before entry of the pre-wetted fabric. The process reminds me of baking bread or making yogurt where the steps need to be carefully followed to achieve the desired results. In the process of bread and yogurt making, there are living cultures involved in order to create the product, and with the creation and dyeing process of indigo, it has that same feeling of being alive. In order to create interesting patterns, my classmates and I would use resist techniques on the fabric like pastes, stitching and clamping. Simple household items like clothespins could be used to create patterns by folding and then placing the pins at intervals along the fold lines. Beautiful and surprising results were achieved using these methods. Image of Indigo dye on fabric during the oxidization process. My dream of being a professional artist, all started in early childhood, and the first memories of my creations go back to Nursery School. I loved playing with all kinds of materials, like paint, clay, and crayons, just to name a few examples. Mel (Melanie), painting at Jack and Jill Nursery School, Walnut Creek, California, 1960. In 1974, a neighbor in Marin where I was living at the time and studying art at College of Marin told me about an Art School in Mexico. I ended up sending off slides of my work with an application to the Instituto Allende, and was delighted to hear that I was accepted. I began my journey to study there in San Miguel de Allende by flying to Mexico City in January of 1975. A bus ride completed that journey. When I first arrived, I moved in with a family who had two small children, including a newborn. It seemed like a safe living situation for a 19-year-old woman, but that shortly proved to not be true when the husband started coming on to me. I ended up finding my own place on the other side of town. It was a spacious abode with a wall that was shared with a weaving factory next door. There were 2 adjoined bedrooms, a bathroom, a large living/kitchen area and a small concrete patio out the back door. There was no hot water, refrigerator or a telephone. When I needed hot water for dishes, I would boil some on the stove. For showers, I had to build a fire in a box below a water tank outside to get hot water. I felt much more secure living there and walking a further distance to the Instituto on the other side of town than living with the husband who had made me feel so unsafe. There was the Central Plaza, which was called the “Jardin” that was in the middle of town, and I would pass through it on my walk quite frequently. This was the site of fireworks and festivals, like the celebration of Cinco de Mayo. The streets were cobblestone and many charming shops and galleries were located downtown. The School itself was on a beautiful campus with large ornate doors in front that were closed when school was not in session. Photo of the closed front doors of the Instituto Allende I had heard about you and what you had done to other women before you appeared in my main living space one sunny spring afternoon pointing a gun at me. You had a bandana wrapped around your face and tied behind your head. I had heard you first, in the bathroom. Dressed in a long polyester dress with colorful psychedelic patterns. I wasn’t wearing any underwear or shoes. I walked through the 2 bedrooms and turned left when I saw you standing there. I screamed and shouted, “help me,” thinking that workers at the Weaving Factory would hear me and come rescue me. Nobody came. You said to me “Coyote” which I later learned meant to be quiet or to shut up. You grabbed my shoulders and dragged me out the unlocked back door onto the concrete patio. The tops of my feet got scraped. I gave up. I knew you were going to rape me. I just wanted you to finish as quickly as possible. You took off your belt and put down your gun. Somehow I managed to pick up your gun and threw it over the wall embedded with glass on the top, into the alleyway. The same wall you had climbed over to get into my place through the unlocked back door. Towards the end of this ordeal, I heard a knock on my door. You left, climbing back over the wall. I answered the door. My friend Rhonda had come by to visit me. I told her what had happened and we walked to the Police Station nearby. I had your belt with me. The one you left behind. I went to the front counter, telling the officers behind the counter what had happened to me. They were laughing and playing cards at the time. I showed them your belt. They told me to bring you in if I saw you again. I left with Rhonda and took a bath at the where place she lived. We didn’t talk about what happened. We moved in together shortly after that. I sent a telegram to my father and stepmother about what had happened to me. Nobody came to help me. Rhonda helped me when I got hepatitis A and could no longer go to school. I was on my own when it came to figuring out how to return to the Bay Area. I moved in with my father and stepmother. They didn’t talk to me about what happened to me. They sent me to a doctor who diagnosed me with type 1 diabetes. He showed me how to give myself insulin injections. He told me to practice by injecting oranges with empty syringes. My mother told me years later that “You were never the same again” after what you did to me. I survived. I gave up art for 15 years before realizing that I wanted to go back to art school. In those years, I became so disturbed that I had panic attacks, deep depression and needed to move in with my mother at age 30. I started therapy after becoming self destructive in my 20’s. Depression also called “the blues” has been my long time companion. It has taken me a lifetime to heal. My iPhone predicts the words, depression, PTSD and C-PTSD for my text messages. After my Indigo dyeing class at San Francisco State, I enrolled in the Textiles Fine Art program at California College of Arts and Crafts (now known as California College of the Arts) in Oakland. I was married at the time and had become pregnant with our daughter Emily right before classes started in September. Emily was born on May 13, 1991. By the Fall of 1992, I was a single mom and an art student. An inheritance from my mother who died in 1995, allowed me to graduate and to buy my first home. I continued to work with indigo dyeing and created a large textile piece about my experience in Mexico. After many years of therapy and other healing modalities, I recently started painting on canvas. Part of that process has been a Soul Retrieval session to bring back my 4 year old self who loved to paint. I am feeling uplifted and encouraged after many years of recurring periods of severe emotional pain. Stay tuned for more details about my new work. One of my final pieces was a textile called “Out of the Blues.”
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I returned to fine art in 1990 when I took at class in indigo dyeing at San Francisco State University. I was lucky that the instructor, Yoshiko Wada, and another student from her class, were in the East Bay so that we could carpool together. We would talk textiles on...
October 22nd, 2020

My Life Destroyed in 5 Minutes

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I have been trying to write this out for a long time Let me first introduce myself and my community My name is Rachel and I live in a very strict austere religious community We go to separate genders schools from the age of 3 We aren’t allowed to touch...
March 15th, 2024

I’m a Survivor because I am a...

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My ex husband wanted to get rid of me and my family because he had a new girlfriend so he started bringing the Neighbors in to rape me and his girlfriends to cut my hair and burn me nothing has been done I went to a woman and children’s battered...
May 24th, 2019

The Statistics that Changed Me

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2 sexual assaults and 1 rape… the statistics of my story. I can’t promise that this story is pleasant, but I can tell you that power and growth comes with telling it. So sincerely, thank you for hearing me out. October 2017 I was in Chebut, Argentina(a part of the...
December 5th, 2020

Summer 2019

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I got my first job working at a lovely Mediterranean restaurant/cafe one summer because my teacher said she knew the man who ran the place and put in a reference for me. I was 15. He was in his 60s. Two days after I started, the groping began. Only he...
March 25th, 2022

Marital Rape

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My husband raped me through the night of February 7th 2020. I was unconscious due to prescription medication taken after being in a car accident two months prior. Police arrested my husband. He posted 25k bail and got out the very next day. Bruises on my stomach and my hips....
May 8th, 2019

Spoke out and was blamed

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I am the only girl at a job of 4 men. I am also 20 while these men are 40+. One worker would grab me from behind when I would walk in the back to the bathroom. This would happen often. One day all my coworkers had to go outside...
March 18th, 2015

Playing House

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My name is Sydney. I’m 13 years old. When I was 7, my mom was on drugs, and I knew she was using. We used to go to this lady’s house, and she and my mom would go to a room and smoke and sniff…etc. One day, I was downstairs...
May 18th, 2021

I Don’t Know My Story

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I don’t know my story.. of all of the pain that I’ve been through.. I couldn’t feel my pain at times.. but what I had to go through to get here.. I’ll never understand my praise.. I don’t try to figure it out.. because my worship my worship is for...
September 16th, 2019

I didn’t know it was rape, I...

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As I sit here watching brave miss world on Netflix I am sobbing. Maybe I’m not alone, probably I am. I was raped by a boy I had a crush on when I was 16. I had drank a glass of wine which had been drugged so even still today...
August 11th, 2020

There is hope

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I was sexually abused abused as a child between the ages of 6-14. As i result i have ptsd. Life has been really rough at times but I feel like I’m coming through the other side. It’s been a long road. The first time I talked about was when I...
August 22nd, 2022

Fraternity gang rape

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This is something I have never shared online before only with close family and my current partner. When I was freshly 19 I moved to Eastern Washington University to start school as a freshman. I had just gotten out of a long term relationship and would be attending school with...
February 16th, 2020

My first love

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I was 13 and we went to the same high school. I didn’t know him but we both took part in drama. He was a year and a half older and we met at a school trip to a theatre one evening. He was a ‘bad boy’ causing trouble but...
June 24th, 2020

Too naïve

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I was 16. I had my first job, a lifeguard. I was so excited. I have been a swimmer since I was 5 so this was a very fitting job for me. I was the youngest person working there by far. Most of the kids were in college and one...
October 12th, 2021

A Family Member Sexually Took Advantage Of...

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When I was 11 or 12 years old me and my family moved to a new neighborhood. Shortly after my mom helped my other family members move in across the street from us. We all wind up getting close because we were all close in age in someway. A family...
July 10th, 2019

So drunk I can’t remember

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I was turning 18. I was partying like any teen would. I drank a lot. I threw up, sat down. They picked me up and put me in their car. They said “don’t worry we’ll take care of you. You won’t miss the bus”. I remember lying on the bed...
December 23rd, 2014

Blaming Myself

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I am 20 years old and it happened when I was 17. I was at a party, the kind with drugs and alcohol. I got too drunk and passed out in the basement. When I came to the boy I had been flirting with all night was on top of...
April 5th, 2009

Thank you

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Thank you for your voice and for your strength.
November 15th, 2020

J’avais 13 ans

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J’avais 13 ans j’étais allé avec mon amie chez un gars pour la soirée ils étaient trois gars et c’etait la première fois que je buvais de l’alcool et ce gars qui s’appelle pascal m’a agressé. Je ne l’ai dis a personne et j’ai fait comme si rien ne s’était...
January 2nd, 2022

I am a Survivor

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I didn’t want to be a survivor once I realized what happened. Hell, I still don’t want to be a survivor. I was seven years old when I first got raped, when something first happened to me. I didn’t understand, I was so scared. It happened by my aunt’s husband....
August 30th, 2019

My story growing up with a secret

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I’m a black South African, I’m 40 years old now, and my son it 20 years old… loved, taught but I still can never live him alone with my nieces as I was left alone and violeted💔💔😭😭 I have spoken about this, but I hate putting this down in writting😭😭...
October 15th, 2022

Male dancer

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Hello my Name is Tj. This happen about 4 years ago I was 19 years old at very young age I always tried to see the good in people. I was always happy and felt nothing could break me down went threw cancer as a baby lost my brother and...
April 9th, 2020

People don’t think your spouse can rape...

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6 months ago my husband forced me to have sex with him because it was his birthday and he deserved it. Even after repeatedly telling him no, I was forced to comply with his request. I felt dirty after that. Like my marriage had been deviled. I went into a...
December 2nd, 2022

Sexual Coercion

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I was sexually coerced this semester at college. It was one of my longtime friends. I thought I could trust him but I was wrong. He and I talked about hanging out and so we did. We talked for a while, was physical and was at first consensual. Then he...
October 18th, 2019

First boyfriend raped me when i was...

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I was 14, he was 17. Both from priveledged white families in Australia. He regularly gave me vodka on the weekends, then on 3 occasions, undressed me and had sex with me when I was unconscious and drunk.
November 11th, 2016

Let’s Fight Back With Love

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Hi fellow survivors. The recent posts I am seeing on this site sadden me because we are all strong survivors and we should try to always remember this. I know like me, many of you are still having a hard time processing that a man who is so clearly a...
December 5th, 2020

Constant fear

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Does he know he destroyed me? Does he know that have a “normal relationship” for 2 years because of him? Does he know that he made me lose weed little confidence I had? Or that I still have nightmares of what you did to me? Does he know that even...
July 19th, 2021

Child sexual abuse

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My child’s father has been sexually abusing her since she was 3 months old.
July 16th, 2019

Robbery

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One night when I was 24 years old, I was returning home after a dinner with friends and two guys approach me two blocks from my building. The took all my money and things, and raped me there on the street. A month later the police caught the guys, and...
November 25th, 2019

Are you sure?

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Sometimes I wish I could say “Hi, I’m the ONE. The ONLY ONE”. That would be extremely lonely, but it would make me happy to know that no one had to go through the same thing. That is not true, though. So, hello, my name is Mariana. I do not...
June 8th, 2023

Unethical or illegal?

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Last year my partner and I worked for the same business. It was a small business near a small town and it had no management or HR of any sort – only one man owned and ran it, even though it served thousands of people each year. I hit it...
August 17th, 2019

My/our German “Weinstein” Case

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My name is Jany Tempel. I live both in Germany and Thailand. I turned public now, to end the big silence of our country. Almost twenty years ago I had already written a novel about my arduous life. The book wasn’t published back then, mainly because I reported on crimes...
December 17th, 2019

dad and mom rape

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PLAYED BASEBALL FOR 3 YEARS IN FRONT OF MY HOUSE WITH MY SON, AND THIS 6TH GRADE GIRL NAMED SAM ,WAS TRYING OUT FOR THE BASEBALL TEAM AT SCHOOL .SHE LIVED 4 DOORS DOWN FROM ME .SHE STARTED TO PLAY WITH US AND GET TO KNOW REAL WELL. ONE DAY...
May 23rd, 2019

Used

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I was 17 years old, it was August 2016. It was the summer going into my senior year. It had been crazy summer but a great one noneless the less. I was staying with my bestfriend (let’s call her G) during the time so we were at her apartment. We...
August 10th, 2014

Halloween Nightmare

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I was raped at the age of 22 while in college. It was my senior year and all I was looking forward to was running well and making the grades in school. I was on the varsity cross country and track team for my university and when October came it...
May 1st, 2019

I don’t know if I was raped

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One night my boyfriend of three years was out with some friends drinking. When he came back home I was already laying in bed. We got into a little altercation and I could smell the alcohol on his breath. He was always a big drinker and I never liked that...
December 26th, 2019

Ms.

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I was raped by a co-worker when I was in my mid-20’s. We were at a work function, we were all drinking, then about 10 of us went to his place to continue the party. He grabbed me on my way out of the washroom and dragged me into his...
June 18th, 2019

My best friends dad

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April 27th 2018. Two weeks prior to this incident I was in Longleaf psychiatric facility. I took over 300 pills cuz I didn’t want to be alive anymore but little did I know the worst was yet to come. Ironically when I decided to take all the pills I called...
August 16th, 2020

Does the pain ever go away?

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I really don’t know how to write this but I do want to try. I’ve been reading these stories for a while and have wanted to write my own but every time I try it’s too hard to actually put words down… I don’t know why this keeps happening. Every...
December 2nd, 2020

Mrs

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I think I may have been raped, nearly 20 years ago. I was staying at my boyfriends house (now ex) at the time. We were young (17) and I was a virgin as we’d decided to wait to progress our relationship. One night I stayed over at his parents house,...
April 21st, 2021

A respectable collegue

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The next day I walked down the stairs to the hotel, aware that he was sitting at the table having breakfast. Some things you think would never happen to you, you think that working externally with a colleague (married and with children) is not dangerous. But then in a moment...
November 4th, 2019

I don’t know anymore

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My high school ends at 10th grade. So you basically start college at 16. As for me, I decided to go abroad and come to the US for college so definitely the rest of the college students were all older than me. I didn’t really fit in. Then one day,...
November 27th, 2021

I was 5.

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Both of my parents worked full-time. On some days during weekdays, they used to send me and my siblings under the care of our neighbour. The lady was a single mother living with her children. My paternal grandmother and all of my uncle and aunts know her. One of her...
May 26th, 2020

My Last Party

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It was my first year of college. I was the type that hated parties since high school so I barely go out. But our midterms were finished and my friend insisted we should go. So I decided to call my boyfriend too. I remember the party was too loud and...
August 18th, 2019

Abusée par un voisin de mes grands...

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Bonjour chère Linor, Je suis en train de regarder Brave Miss World. Merci! Je témoigne car j’en ai peu parlé dans ma vie. J’avais 4 ou 5 ans. Je vivais avec mes grands-parents et ils me posaient parfois le samedi chez la voisine qui me gardait pour aller à un...
March 19th, 2023

Simple games was a way to hide...

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Trigger warning: I am healing well after many many years of understanding and facing the sexual abuse I experienced as a child. I think it’s important to share this experience so parents can look out for similar behavior in abusers. Please watch for innocent games that could really be more....
April 27th, 2019

Everyone Else Likes You, Too

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I had never been to a bar before. Sure, I’d gone out to Applebees with other coworkers where they’d serve me drinks. But I was 19, and had to drive home. I had never been drunk before, and didn’t push my limits. I went to the bar to see him...
April 25th, 2018

Just Playing

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My brother and I got into some basic games of “Doctor”. Nothing starting out as abuse, just a lot of looking, and a little touching. One afternoon he inserted a finger, and I got a little blood. I went and told an adult, as I was supposed to, and because...
October 12th, 2023

Workplace Sexual Harassment

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As I write this story to you, please note that this sexual harassment case is still in progress. It began in December of 2022 when I worked as a contractor for a company named TEKsystems. I do IT work for Nutrien Ag Solutions. The first week I was there, I...
September 18th, 2019

Raped in the Air Force

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My first duty stationed 28 years ago, i was sexually assaulted by my first supervisor and violently raped by an officer in my unit. The violence of that raped, ruined me for a long time. Suffer from severe PTSD and after 31 years i am being forced out of the...
February 1st, 2021

I didn’t know

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Hello, I don’t always tell this story because I have afraid of reactions but I really need help… When I was 14 a 25 years old man asked me to a coffee, I wanted new friends so I accepted but I hadn’t anything although just a coffee in my head....
December 7th, 2019

Things do get better

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I am a very happy person now. I’m dating the best person I know but I, too had a horrible history. I was bullied in high school. It all started when I was invited to a party. I went there and a guy offered me a drink and dumb me...
November 4th, 2019

I don’t know anymore

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My high school ends at 10th grade. So you basically start college at 16. As for me, I decided to go abroad and come to the US for college so definitely the rest of the college students were all older than me. I didn’t really fit in. Then one day,...
March 5th, 2024

My step dad raped me

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I would have never imagined the person who I praised and idolised could have ever hurt me this much. An individual who I adored more than I could have anyone. A parent is a person whose sole purpose is to provide, care for and show love to their child. A...
February 13th, 2020

Start of grooming at 15

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When I was around 11 years old my parents and I moved to a new house. It was a lovely time. A neighbour of ours who was very friendly with the rest of our neighbourhood as first was kind. People always said he was very charming. Walking home from school...
September 2nd, 2020

This Is Me, my fight song

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College has started, around this time I was a college freshman fully moved in and Saying bye to my parents. I felt so cool living on my own in my own place, doing my own thing and the best part was, I was playing soccer. It was everything and more....
April 1st, 2021

Sex doll

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After work one night I was drugged by a co-worker. I woke up in his bed naked. He was not in the room. I felt 2 emotions very heavily and immediately. Shame and wrong. I remember looking around for my clothes in a panic. I don’t remember how I got...
September 23rd, 2020

my teacher grabbed me

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in school i had a teacher reach down my shirt and up my skirt to grab my behind. I’ve had this happen with the same teacher 3 times so my parents removed me from the school and i started a new one where i have lots of mental health support...
April 12th, 2017

The abuser

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When I was 4 my mum married the most aggressive man. When I was 6 he started touching me and making me watch him touch himself and was told to never to tell anyone. Of course I never because I was terrified it kept happening until I was about 15,...
August 30th, 2021

MY Inspirational Story

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Hi my name is Faizan sheikh. I am 18 years of age and all my life I have lived with Trisomy 18. This is called Mosaic Edwards Syndrome. This is where a very small number of babies with Mosaic Edwards Syndrome about one in a hundred have only a section...