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April 21st, 2021

A respectable collegue

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The next day I walked down the stairs to the hotel, aware that he was sitting at the table having breakfast. Some things you think would never happen to you, you think that working externally with a colleague (married and with children) is not dangerous. But then in a moment...
September 18th, 2019

Raped in the Air Force

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My first duty stationed 28 years ago, i was sexually assaulted by my first supervisor and violently raped by an officer in my unit. The violence of that raped, ruined me for a long time. Suffer from severe PTSD and after 31 years i am being forced out of the...
March 6th, 2023

Finally telling my story.

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It was summer time, I was going into third grade when it all happen. It lasted until I was in sixth grade, you might be wondering why it lasted that long and I can tell you why. My names Caitlin and I’m a survivor of sexual assault. It all started...
August 24th, 2019

My Trauma(s)

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Why do I freeze at the worst possible times? Why can’t I move? Why can’t I scream? Why can’t I fight back? Does it mean that I want it if I don’t fight back? Each time I tell my story or share the shit I’ve been through, I have to...
August 26th, 2019

Family members ex husband

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I was 5 years old going through heart surgery when he would come home late from work drunk, or high or his normal scary self and he would come into my room and put his hands down my pants and feel my butt I would act like I couldn’t feel...
April 27th, 2019

Everyone Else Likes You, Too

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I had never been to a bar before. Sure, I’d gone out to Applebees with other coworkers where they’d serve me drinks. But I was 19, and had to drive home. I had never been drunk before, and didn’t push my limits. I went to the bar to see him...
April 16th, 2009

Thank you

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I am a survivor of sexual abuse and rape. As a child my father repeatedly raped both my sister and I until we were adopted by my step-father. I suffered from selective amnesia and didn’t remember much of my youth until I was a freshman in college and began having...
May 8th, 2019

UNEXPOSED – AFTER 30 YEARS OF EXTREME...

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Molestation 4-13, dissociation syndrome started, afraid 24/7, PTSD 10, black outs began & were triggered by the smell of certain foods or a male authorities voice. Attempted Rape 15, Physical Abuse 16-31, all my ex-boyfriends. Rape 18, also attempted suicide & started dancing because I needed extra money & no...
May 8th, 2019

Spoke out and was blamed

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I am the only girl at a job of 4 men. I am also 20 while these men are 40+. One worker would grab me from behind when I would walk in the back to the bathroom. This would happen often. One day all my coworkers had to go outside...
June 24th, 2020

Too naïve

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I was 16. I had my first job, a lifeguard. I was so excited. I have been a swimmer since I was 5 so this was a very fitting job for me. I was the youngest person working there by far. Most of the kids were in college and one...
May 24th, 2019

The Statistics that Changed Me

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2 sexual assaults and 1 rape… the statistics of my story. I can’t promise that this story is pleasant, but I can tell you that power and growth comes with telling it. So sincerely, thank you for hearing me out. October 2017 I was in Chebut, Argentina(a part of the...
August 5th, 2022

When I was 4

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I was 4 when I started to get raped by my mom’s friend. He normally did it to me when my mom went to the store or to see a friend. It was mostly oral sex. I didn’t tell anyone because he said he would kill my mom but also...
July 20th, 2019

No man, however old, is safe.

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I was naive, I thought old men at age 80 was safe. I delivered something to a Church member. He was also the contractor of our house. He had told me his wife was not in, it did not faze me. I was going to drop it off and leave....
October 12th, 2021

A Family Member Sexually Took Advantage Of...

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When I was 11 or 12 years old me and my family moved to a new neighborhood. Shortly after my mom helped my other family members move in across the street from us. We all wind up getting close because we were all close in age in someway. A family...
June 8th, 2023

Unethical or illegal?

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Last year my partner and I worked for the same business. It was a small business near a small town and it had no management or HR of any sort – only one man owned and ran it, even though it served thousands of people each year. I hit it...
July 2nd, 2019

She was 5 years old

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I was four years old and was at a family reunion where I went to play with my female, five year old cousin. I knew something was wrong when she had the door locked from the outside by her brother and told me that I couldn’t tell anyone what we...
October 2nd, 2019

A Letter to Survivors

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August 10th, 2022

Middle school sexual harassment

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Hi, my name is Valeria. When i was in middle school i was constantly cat-called and sexual harassed. people would ask me to do things (I did a couple times until i caught on).
December 11th, 2020

Letter to…

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To all the boys who watched porn and grew up thinking that’s how women deserve to be treated To the parents, teachers, adults who should know better, who never taught us about consent or that women are equal partners in sex To the society that made me feel like sex...
August 17th, 2019

My/our German “Weinstein” Case

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My name is Jany Tempel. I live both in Germany and Thailand. I turned public now, to end the big silence of our country. Almost twenty years ago I had already written a novel about my arduous life. The book wasn’t published back then, mainly because I reported on crimes...
September 13th, 2022

Raped in my own bed

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Locked forever in Liberty Plaza, Frozen in time, always saying no, But no one hears me, no one listens and no one comes. But why would they? If I don’t scream for help. Locked forever, in my tiny uni room. Your clothes, stained with vomit, in my bathroom. Photos of...
November 15th, 2020

J’avais 13 ans

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J’avais 13 ans j’étais allé avec mon amie chez un gars pour la soirée ils étaient trois gars et c’etait la première fois que je buvais de l’alcool et ce gars qui s’appelle pascal m’a agressé. Je ne l’ai dis a personne et j’ai fait comme si rien ne s’était...
January 29th, 2022

My stepfather raped me

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When I was 11 years old my parents were divorced and my mother moved myself and my brother to her hometown which was 18 miles away. It wasn’t long before my mom had a new boyfriend she moved in and married. He wasn’t a stranger, he and his wife had...
December 5th, 2020

Summer 2019

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I got my first job working at a lovely Mediterranean restaurant/cafe one summer because my teacher said she knew the man who ran the place and put in a reference for me. I was 15. He was in his 60s. Two days after I started, the groping began. Only he...
March 17th, 2023

Indigo

I returned to fine art in 1990 when I took at class in indigo dyeing at San Francisco State University. I was lucky that the instructor, Yoshiko Wada, and another student from her class, were in the East Bay so that we could carpool together. We would talk textiles on our weekly journey across the Bay Bridge to the Campus. The other student was an accomplished Quilter named Linda MacDonald. Linda lived in Willits near the famous Mendocino Art Center, but traveled to Berkeley to attend this class once a week. The Indigo vat was made in a 32-gallon garbage can and had to be kept covered between dyeing sessions. Indigo is a unique rich blue dye that develops with an oxidization process when exposed to air. Dipping the fabric several times, and allowing the natural fiber to oxidize before dipping it again, creates darker shades of blue. The dye in the vat is created from a mixture of indigo pigment, various chemicals and a reducing agent to remove oxygen from the dye. It is a rich green color while in the vat, which shows up on the fabric before it is fully exposed to the air. The smell emitted from the dye is unusual, a musky odor in my mind. I like to think that it smells like the color blue. The vat needs to be carefully stirred and maintained between dyeing sessions. There is a “bloom” on the top of the vat created by oxidized indigo, making a bubbly and shiny ball of material reminiscent of a flower. The “bloom” gets moved to the side before entry of the pre-wetted fabric. The process reminds me of baking bread or making yogurt where the steps need to be carefully followed to achieve the desired results. In the process of bread and yogurt making, there are living cultures involved in order to create the product, and with the creation and dyeing process of indigo, it has that same feeling of being alive. In order to create interesting patterns, my classmates and I would use resist techniques on the fabric like pastes, stitching and clamping. Simple household items like clothespins could be used to create patterns by folding and then placing the pins at intervals along the fold lines. Beautiful and surprising results were achieved using these methods. Image of Indigo dye on fabric during the oxidization process. My dream of being a professional artist, all started in early childhood, and the first memories of my creations go back to Nursery School. I loved playing with all kinds of materials, like paint, clay, and crayons, just to name a few examples. Mel (Melanie), painting at Jack and Jill Nursery School, Walnut Creek, California, 1960. In 1974, a neighbor in Marin where I was living at the time and studying art at College of Marin told me about an Art School in Mexico. I ended up sending off slides of my work with an application to the Instituto Allende, and was delighted to hear that I was accepted. I began my journey to study there in San Miguel de Allende by flying to Mexico City in January of 1975. A bus ride completed that journey. When I first arrived, I moved in with a family who had two small children, including a newborn. It seemed like a safe living situation for a 19-year-old woman, but that shortly proved to not be true when the husband started coming on to me. I ended up finding my own place on the other side of town. It was a spacious abode with a wall that was shared with a weaving factory next door. There were 2 adjoined bedrooms, a bathroom, a large living/kitchen area and a small concrete patio out the back door. There was no hot water, refrigerator or a telephone. When I needed hot water for dishes, I would boil some on the stove. For showers, I had to build a fire in a box below a water tank outside to get hot water. I felt much more secure living there and walking a further distance to the Instituto on the other side of town than living with the husband who had made me feel so unsafe. There was the Central Plaza, which was called the “Jardin” that was in the middle of town, and I would pass through it on my walk quite frequently. This was the site of fireworks and festivals, like the celebration of Cinco de Mayo. The streets were cobblestone and many charming shops and galleries were located downtown. The School itself was on a beautiful campus with large ornate doors in front that were closed when school was not in session. Photo of the closed front doors of the Instituto Allende I had heard about you and what you had done to other women before you appeared in my main living space one sunny spring afternoon pointing a gun at me. You had a bandana wrapped around your face and tied behind your head. I had heard you first, in the bathroom. Dressed in a long polyester dress with colorful psychedelic patterns. I wasn’t wearing any underwear or shoes. I walked through the 2 bedrooms and turned left when I saw you standing there. I screamed and shouted, “help me,” thinking that workers at the Weaving Factory would hear me and come rescue me. Nobody came. You said to me “Coyote” which I later learned meant to be quiet or to shut up. You grabbed my shoulders and dragged me out the unlocked back door onto the concrete patio. The tops of my feet got scraped. I gave up. I knew you were going to rape me. I just wanted you to finish as quickly as possible. You took off your belt and put down your gun. Somehow I managed to pick up your gun and threw it over the wall embedded with glass on the top, into the alleyway. The same wall you had climbed over to get into my place through the unlocked back door. Towards the end of this ordeal, I heard a knock on my door. You left, climbing back over the wall. I answered the door. My friend Rhonda had come by to visit me. I told her what had happened and we walked to the Police Station nearby. I had your belt with me. The one you left behind. I went to the front counter, telling the officers behind the counter what had happened to me. They were laughing and playing cards at the time. I showed them your belt. They told me to bring you in if I saw you again. I left with Rhonda and took a bath at the where place she lived. We didn’t talk about what happened. We moved in together shortly after that. I sent a telegram to my father and stepmother about what had happened to me. Nobody came to help me. Rhonda helped me when I got hepatitis A and could no longer go to school. I was on my own when it came to figuring out how to return to the Bay Area. I moved in with my father and stepmother. They didn’t talk to me about what happened to me. They sent me to a doctor who diagnosed me with type 1 diabetes. He showed me how to give myself insulin injections. He told me to practice by injecting oranges with empty syringes. My mother told me years later that “You were never the same again” after what you did to me. I survived. I gave up art for 15 years before realizing that I wanted to go back to art school. In those years, I became so disturbed that I had panic attacks, deep depression and needed to move in with my mother at age 30. I started therapy after becoming self destructive in my 20’s. Depression also called “the blues” has been my long time companion. It has taken me a lifetime to heal. My iPhone predicts the words, depression, PTSD and C-PTSD for my text messages. After my Indigo dyeing class at San Francisco State, I enrolled in the Textiles Fine Art program at California College of Arts and Crafts (now known as California College of the Arts) in Oakland. I was married at the time and had become pregnant with our daughter Emily right before classes started in September. Emily was born on May 13, 1991. By the Fall of 1992, I was a single mom and an art student. An inheritance from my mother who died in 1995, allowed me to graduate and to buy my first home. I continued to work with indigo dyeing and created a large textile piece about my experience in Mexico. After many years of therapy and other healing modalities, I recently started painting on canvas. Part of that process has been a Soul Retrieval session to bring back my 4 year old self who loved to paint. I am feeling uplifted and encouraged after many years of recurring periods of severe emotional pain. Stay tuned for more details about my new work. One of my final pieces was a textile called “Out of the Blues.”
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I returned to fine art in 1990 when I took at class in indigo dyeing at San Francisco State University. I was lucky that the instructor, Yoshiko Wada, and another student from her class, were in the East Bay so that we could carpool together. We would talk textiles on...
January 21st, 2015

I Didn’t Want to Do It

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At the age of 13, I got my first boyfriend. We went to the same school. He was 16. We were going out for about 1 year. He always wanted to do more things with me, but I always said “No.” One day when I was 14, I went to...
September 26th, 2019

my story

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It felt like I was reliving the moments over and over again, I couldn’t withdraw myself from them feelings and having no closure for nearly four years was the most painful experiences of my childhood. There was no growing up with a picture perfect family, I was the outcast. Never...
March 12th, 2016

Hurt and Anger

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I was 9 years old when it all started, my mom started working in a new restaurant and would leave at 5am and come back at 3pm, and my “father” didn’t work for he had a lawsuit that didn’t let him work. It was random when my “father” started to...
July 8th, 2021

Dad Raped Me

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1) this man “casually” crossed my boundaries. When I told him to stop, he did, but throughout the encounter he continued to ask me if I would like it if he did the thing that I told him explicitly he could not do. I never mentioned this interaction being poor...
December 7th, 2019

Things do get better

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I am a very happy person now. I’m dating the best person I know but I, too had a horrible history. I was bullied in high school. It all started when I was invited to a party. I went there and a guy offered me a drink and dumb me...
July 29th, 2013

Why: A Poem About My Rape

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Soothe my whys with soft whispers Wipe my tears with your love Make me whole again No more, I beg No more No more Unwanted touch Unwelcomed Stiff, rough caresses No man to hold me down, Give me forbidden kisses Legs forced apart Like rusty hinges Hinges to a door...
March 23rd, 2021

Thought He Was A Friend

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I was raped when I was in my early 20’s by someone I thought was a friend. The night began when a group of us went out to the bars and came back to my friends house afterwards to crash. I had gotten very, very drunk and I passed out...
August 18th, 2019

Abusée par un voisin de mes grands...

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Bonjour chère Linor, Je suis en train de regarder Brave Miss World. Merci! Je témoigne car j’en ai peu parlé dans ma vie. J’avais 4 ou 5 ans. Je vivais avec mes grands-parents et ils me posaient parfois le samedi chez la voisine qui me gardait pour aller à un...
October 15th, 2022

Male dancer

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Hello my Name is Tj. This happen about 4 years ago I was 19 years old at very young age I always tried to see the good in people. I was always happy and felt nothing could break me down went threw cancer as a baby lost my brother and...
October 12th, 2023

Workplace Sexual Harassment

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As I write this story to you, please note that this sexual harassment case is still in progress. It began in December of 2022 when I worked as a contractor for a company named TEKsystems. I do IT work for Nutrien Ag Solutions. The first week I was there, I...
August 30th, 2019

My story growing up with a secret

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I’m a black South African, I’m 40 years old now, and my son it 20 years old… loved, taught but I still can never live him alone with my nieces as I was left alone and violeted💔💔😭😭 I have spoken about this, but I hate putting this down in writting😭😭...
August 28th, 2023

I was attacked at 19 years old

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Hi My Name Is Su. I was Kiddnapped,Stabbed and Raped at 19 years old.I was Dragged out of my first little apartment by knife point in the early hours of the MorningI I Did Not know my Attacker. I Suffered My whole life,trying to have some sense of normalcy after...
December 26th, 2019

Ms.

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I was raped by a co-worker when I was in my mid-20’s. We were at a work function, we were all drinking, then about 10 of us went to his place to continue the party. He grabbed me on my way out of the washroom and dragged me into his...
January 2nd, 2016

It Was the Second

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This story may not be relevant. But when I was 11 yrs old, I was almost raped by my aunt’s, husbands, uncle. I had such an uncomfortable feeling when I was around him…. well, I’ll just get to the point. He was a guest, so my aunt asked me to...
August 22nd, 2022

Fraternity gang rape

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This is something I have never shared online before only with close family and my current partner. When I was freshly 19 I moved to Eastern Washington University to start school as a freshman. I had just gotten out of a long term relationship and would be attending school with...
September 8th, 2019

Frozen in fear

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I thank you for your story. I have kept silent about all my traumas for most of my life. In the last 2 years I have started my healing journey and still have a hard time sharing with anyone but my therapist. I mostly have shamed myself because of how...
February 4th, 2021

Raped at the Air Force Academy

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In 2002 I was appointed to the Air Force Academy Preparatory School in Colorado Springs, CO. The prep school was a sort of booster school for people who wanted to be at the Academy but fell short of their appointment. It could have been due to grades, SAT/ACT scores, athletics,...
August 13th, 2022

Scammer

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This is my story; Being a fan of a few Korean actors and follow them trough a fan page is a great way to be updated for all the in’s and out’s. Especially you can share these with more admires all over the world, we all admire these amazing actors....
June 18th, 2020

Feeling lonely and isolated

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I was 11/12 when a friend of my parents raped me for the first time. We were on a vacation together. After that it continued until I was 14. I didn’t dare to tell anyone because I thought no one would believe me because it seemed everyone liked him. I...
February 27th, 2020

Was it rape?

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I was 21. I’m a Christian and as taught in my circle we are to be virgins until marriage and I was trying to uphold that, but I was curious about sex and flirting with sex. I went to a Baptist university where being alone with a guy wasn’t even...
August 26th, 2020

Stranger, Friend, Lawyer, and Youth Leader

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People have accused me of being a liar and the one with whom the fault lies… repeatedly. They use statistics to give themselves a platform to shame me or to feel better about their lives, because they don’t want to face reality. The reality is that statistics are not always...
March 8th, 2020

You Were Supposed to Be My Protector

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You were supposed to keep me safe. Instead, you were the one to cause me harm. You came into my room one night when I was thirteen and took my virginity. You were my stepfather but still was supposed to take care of me like a father. You entered my...
December 2nd, 2022

Sexual Coercion

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I was sexually coerced this semester at college. It was one of my longtime friends. I thought I could trust him but I was wrong. He and I talked about hanging out and so we did. We talked for a while, was physical and was at first consensual. Then he...
August 24th, 2020

Raped by my step father

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I don’t know where to start or the right way to say this. All I remember is that i was primary doing grade 5 when i decided to tell my grandma of what was happening regarding my step father, he went under my blankets nearly every night, from grade 3...
September 15th, 2019

I didn’t fight back.

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I was 17. I went to a house party of a friend of a friend and knew no one other then the friend I went with. I got talking to a guy, he suggested we went upstairs to a bedroom so we could talk properly. I stupidly agreed. He tried...
March 14th, 2015

Broken Trust

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I had a friend who I quickly became very close with. I was very depressed at the time and he was too so I spent all my time with him and went to his house everyday. However, when I started falling asleep there, he would touch me and I would...
November 11th, 2016

Let’s Fight Back With Love

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Hi fellow survivors. The recent posts I am seeing on this site sadden me because we are all strong survivors and we should try to always remember this. I know like me, many of you are still having a hard time processing that a man who is so clearly a...
July 10th, 2019

So drunk I can’t remember

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I was turning 18. I was partying like any teen would. I drank a lot. I threw up, sat down. They picked me up and put me in their car. They said “don’t worry we’ll take care of you. You won’t miss the bus”. I remember lying on the bed...
August 11th, 2020

Raped by a US Marine when I...

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I was home from college and out at a local bar to reunite with friends. I was out with people I considered myself close to and still do. I remember having one drink and ended up at the bar for one more before I called it a night. A person...
May 29th, 2019

Nothing Feels Beautiful Anymore

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I remember it was February. I remember closing my eyes and agreeing that although it was only 2pm that I would end my day. I closed my eyes and agreed, “Okay, I am done.” I have never wanted to end a day at 2pm. I have been annoyed and frustrated...
June 9th, 2019

i said yes but i really meant...

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I was 15. I was with two of my friends when he invited us to his friends house with two of his mates. He had a girlfriend. I knew him as he was 2 years above me in school. They encouraged us to drink straight vodka. We got so drunk...
June 19th, 2022

I didn’t even know I was pregnant

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When I was thirteen I had one friend. I had a selective mutism and non-white in a very unsafe households, with a single absent mother who was debting, and I was bullied in school. I was already sexually abused every night by my biological father, and was constantly dissociated from...
June 29th, 2020

Red Flags

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I texted her. The girl he is currently seeing. I reached out to her as soon as I found out they were together. I told her that he was in fact a predator and told her to be careful. I didn’t need to text her, but I did. It was...
January 11th, 2016

Dad and Uncle Raped Me

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I was 12 years old. Christmas Eve 1995 when I was home with my dad and his brother who my uncle. They were drinking, I was in my room sleeping when my uncle came in and took my pants off. He was kissing and touching me. He said he wanted...
April 1st, 2021

Sex doll

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After work one night I was drugged by a co-worker. I woke up in his bed naked. He was not in the room. I felt 2 emotions very heavily and immediately. Shame and wrong. I remember looking around for my clothes in a panic. I don’t remember how I got...
September 13th, 2019

He was right

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I was dating this older man for about over 3 months and I was very happy with this person and we made so much happy memories in such a short time but long story short it just did not work out. He did not want to break up but I...
December 10th, 2019

Raped by stranger x2

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In my 2nd rape when I was 20 yrs old, I went into shock during and after the assault. Afterwards, my body shook for hours, but I tried to act normal in front of people. I felt like I was dreaming – everything and everyone seemed unreal. But, I also...
April 25th, 2017

Was it rape? Or my fault?

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I am not sure if what happen is even considered rape… but I am really hoping someone can help me figure this out. It all started when I was 17 years old I was going through a break up and I was not the best version of myself. My brothers...
July 24th, 2019

LOST

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When I was 5 years old, I was sexually assaulted by many men. The next day I tried to kill myself. At the age of 10, I was raped and again tried to end it by ending my life. I also am a survivor of FASD and there for not...
March 25th, 2022

Marital Rape

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My husband raped me through the night of February 7th 2020. I was unconscious due to prescription medication taken after being in a car accident two months prior. Police arrested my husband. He posted 25k bail and got out the very next day. Bruises on my stomach and my hips....