I was molested at 2, I remember waking and going to sleep with older boy on top of me, but I was also molested by my father until I was 6, I Kept That From happening to my sister. If you knew back than the highlight of my life was 5th grade promotion, I got over over 11 awards and it was the year of the lion king, I was one of three students to get a lion. At 9-10, I became an author and illustrator, me and a couple others did a book by ourselves for young authors. I was apart of an assemble, and choir first taste of theatre we did the play the Mikado. 14-15 we stated poetry slams I loved the library so much we inspired the teen center. I thank God, he made me different all I had was words, and art and music without these I would have died…. Continue reading »
The Day I Was Raped and Abandoned
1.9.07 It is the same every year. Every year the leaves turn, and there is that slight twinge in my leg, a hesitant reminder of times past. Every year as the winds change, there is that slight catch when you take a deep breath. A catch not from the cold but from a memory. A memory of sobs choked back. Of times much darker than this. A memory of a time survived and not forgotten. Every year. I am glad though, I would rather have the twinges. The shudders of sobs never to be forgotten. I would rather remember those times, the dark life altering times that I have survived. I would rather live the life of a proud and ferocious survivor. Because that is what I have done, that is what I do, and that is what I will do. I will survive today like I survived yesterday, and like I will survive tomorrow,… Continue reading »
University Bar
I was in my university student bar with a friend visiting from home- we had decided to let loose one final time before exams and got incredibly drunk. Upon arriving at the ‘Club Night’ in my SU we were waiting at the bar and met some guys. From what I can remember the one I was talking to was older and not a student at the university, as it transpired he had actually come from London. He bought us drinks which we drunkenly accepted which he told us to down so we could have another. After this first drink my mind goes blank and it isn’t until a while later when I’m outside walking back to my accommodation with just him that I start to recall the rest of the night. I was saying that he couldn’t stay as my friend was here and there was no space to which he kept saying he was… Continue reading »
Scared and Confused
Two years ago I was a sophomore in high school. It was the last day of school and some guy I saw of as my brother asked me if I was going to go to the same class we have. I said yes. On my way to class I decided to stop by the bathroom because I had to use it. As soon as I got out the bathroom to head to class, I saw him right outside the class. He asked for a hug and I gave him one considering it was his last year. After the hug, he trapped me by the wall and said he wanted to have sex. I told him it’s wrong and that he has a girlfriend and all he said was that she doesn’t need to know. I told him no but maybe I wasn’t loud enough. I tried to leave but he wouldn’t let me (he is… Continue reading »
Deja Vu
When it happened, I didn’t want to believe it. I tried to convince myself it just had to be a nightmare. It couldn’t possibly be happening. Not again. Not by him. He was my best friend. When I was raped the first time around, roughly four years ago, he was there for me. He was the one who stayed up with me those late nights when I was crying, let me sleep in his dorm room when I couldn’t handle being in my own, and convinced me everything was going to be alright. He said he’d be there for me, that he’d protect me. And for four years, he did. He was always there for me. And he did look out for me. See, the first time destroyed me, at least for a while. The guy was an old boyfriend. We’d dated freshman year of high school, and we stayed friends. Then freshman year of… Continue reading »
A Victim No Longer
I am a survivor of sexual abuse. I am 19 years old. When I was 4 till I was in fourth grade my step father molested me. I loved him like he was my father for so many years. He took so much of my innocence from me. I remember his voice in my ear in a husk telling me how much he loved me and needed me. TO a four year old. The last time he abused me we were on the way home from dropping my brother off at camp. My step father told me how i was his gas like a car needs gas he needs me. I sat as far from him as possible. When we got home i wanted to get into pool he got in with me and let his trunks fall off. He slowly walked toward me and i screamed hopped out of pool and threatened to tell…. Continue reading »
They Laughed
It was the first time I’d ever used a fake ID, the first time anyone had ever bought me a drink, the first time I’d ever worn too little clothes on a freezing December night because hours of dancing didn’t need a winter coat. I was celebrating the end of an intensely controlling and jealous relationship: new friends, new excitement. Twenty five drinks had quickly saturated every one of my hundred pounds and had catapulted me to a happily flirtatious and dangerously trusting state. I was going to make up for all the frat parties and drunken nights I had missed under the control of my ex. It was the first time I’d gotten to be a normal college girl, just doing fun dumb things with fun dumb friends. I mixed liquors, I laughed, I shared my deepest secrets and a bathroom stall with a girlfriend, I writhed on the dance floor, I felt beautiful… Continue reading »
Drugged
I was raped 8 months ago…I was 20 years old at the time at my university when it happened. After watching Brave Miss World I felt compelled to share my story. I went out to the bar one night and got a drink, I set it down for a short while to help a friend and didn’t think anything of it. Soon after I began to feel weird, almost as if my body was beginning to weigh thousands of pounds. I went to the restrooms and realized I was in trouble. I remember leaving the restroom but nothing else, I blacked out and remember very little until I was laying on the steps outside of my apartment. The moments I do remember are of me laying on my stomach feeling the weight of someone on top of me and feeling a sharp pain, i tried to fight but couldn’t and I passed out again. When… Continue reading »
Effort To Survive
Yesterday, I read on a magazine about Linor and the documentary. I was very touch. Today, I go to your website and think that I must share my own story. It was the night of Saturday the 16th November 2013 in Brussels, Belgium. In July 2013, when I was 21 years-old, I received a full scholarship to study my last undergraduate year in Brussels. With a Vietnamese young girl like me, this was a golden opportunity to go far and explore the world. I arrived to Belgium in August 2013. On Thursday the 14th November 2013, a male student from the same home university visited me. He went to Europe with the same scholarship as me, but to Warsaw, Poland. When I was in Vietnam, this boy was recognized as one of the best students in our home university due to his study results and his polite appearance. So I trusted in him voluntarily and… Continue reading »
My Ex-Boyfriend and Rapist
When I was 19, I had the world in the palm of my hand. I had just graduated high school and community college, both with advanced honors. In the fall, I transferred to university and was looking forward to all that college life had to offer; I was excited for my new classes. I had started dating a boy, who I will call P, that I had met online. The first time we went on a date to the beach and just walked around and talked all night. I thought he was a great guy. Until he started the cycle of abuse right then and there. I have always been insecure about my looks. He asked me if I was Jewish. I was surprised at the random question and said no, why? He then said “because you have a huge nose” and he laughed about it as I cried. He apologized later and I decided… Continue reading »