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My Daughter’s Story

One day, I hope my daughter is able to share her story but for now, she is but a child. As her mother, this has been the most traumatizing thing I have ever experienced. It was my greatest fear and it came true. My ex husband and I have been divorced for almost ten years. He has never been in my children’s lives very much. He was kind of a deadbeat- didn’t pay child support, didn’t see them very often. About two years ago, he started getting in trouble with the police because he has a drug addiction and was stealing to pay for drugs. While he was in jail, he started calling the kids. It was the first time their dad had ever called them to talk to THEM in their lives and they were very happy. When he was released from jail, I made him work up the trust before I would let… Continue reading »

Sexual Abuse of Minors

Firstly I would like to thank you for sharing your story, I watched the series on Netflix and am astounded at the amount of abuse there is in the world. I am a woman of 56 years old and my sister is 59 years old. We grew up in Zeekoevlei in Cape Town after our mother left us with my father who then remarried. Our abuse was horrific as from the age of 4 and 8 years old we where forced to do manual labour, not allowed to sit on furniture, no be allowed in the house during the day, could not enter the home through the front door, clean beer bottles all day during the holidays. All our this mental / physical abuse was horrendous but the worst was to come. In 1974 my stepmothers two brothers broke into our room and molested us. I was 11 at the time as was finger penetrated… Continue reading »

Raped At 12 Years Old– Letter to Attacker

To the person who took my innocence, Are you happy with yourself? Did raping me give you the power you were looking for? Do you feel like a man now? 30% of women were between the ages of 11 and 17 at the time of their first completed rape. I was one of those 30%: I was only 12 years-old! I wasn’t even a teenager yet. Because of you, I lost my childhood. I was home-bound for weeks. Weeks turned to months. Months turned into years. You know, I can hardly remember those years. I lost myself completely, and it was all because of you. You made me suffer for years. It took me a long time to figure out what I did wrong. I kept asking myself if I deserved it. I blamed myself. I hated myself. “Worthless.” “Stupid.” “Porque no puedes ser una niña normal?” Countless times of suicidal thoughts and attempts. Just… Continue reading »

I didn’t realise until now

For years I have been suffering with depression ,anxiety and OCD. I often wondered why I felt like this,There are many reasons but I think this could be one of them and I have just blocked it out, until now I didn’t think about it but after a recent reminder it’s all I can think about and I need to clarify it with at least someone. I was 14, at the time I was meeting up with a friend and her boyfriend, as you do he brought his friends along with him and we went to chill around town. At one point my friends boyfriend said he needed to go home to get changed or something so we tagged along…Why not? I didn’t intend on doing anything with the guys friend as I didn’t find him attractive. I was there simply as friends. He was about 17/18 at the time I think but I’m not… Continue reading »

This will be painful

This will be painful. This will bring up things I don’t want to talk about. But I think it needs to be said. I think it needs to be written out. It’s therapeutic in a sort of way. This is the story of my stolen childhood. It started a little before my eighth birthday, after my brother was born. I remember the first time. Clear as day. I don’t remember how I got there or why I was where it happened. We were in a basement. In a part that was unfinished. He was wearing a green shirt with two dark green stripes, a single blue stripe, and a white stripe in the middle. I don’t remember what I was wearing. He told me he wanted to show me something cool. He sat down in between two pipes. Plumbing of some sort. Maybe goes upstairs? Maybe for a bathroom? The floor was gray concrete. It… Continue reading »

Need help

I had just turned 17. November 1986. My brother had come home from college for Thanksgiving. My parents left us alone. We had a party. After everyone left, my bother’s childhood friend stayed. I was asleep in my parents room. Don crept down the hall. My brother called out to him..he said that he was “using the bathroom.” he went back to whatever room he was asleep in. I got up and locked my parents bedroom door. Sometime later, he picked the lock. I woke up to him using my hand to stroke his penis. He put his hand over my mouth and raped me repeatedly. I would have never have told a soul but I came up pregnant and my mother knew that I was. I told her I was a victim and she never said, “I don’t believe you.” but her actions proved just that. She told me not to tell anyone and… Continue reading »

My so called “best friend”

I had just moved into a new school. 7th grade. I met a guy Named Eric. I was absolutely obsessed with him. We dated for a while, nothing serious though. I moved schools, then came back in the 8th grade. That’s when it all started. In class, he would send notes to me asking me to perform sexual favors. When I declined, he’d always go to his signature move. “We’re best friends, and best friends do anything for each other”. I declined each time. He would rub my boobs every time he walked by me in the hallway. I never told my family because I wanted to handle it by myself. It got worse. One day in art class, he grabbed my hand and pulled me to his face and said “we’re gonna go to the bathroom, and you’re going to give me a blowjob. No excuses”. I pulled away and ran across the room… Continue reading »

Someone I should be able to trust

I was four hours the first time my mum left me alone with my grandfather playing with a doll called rainbow bright funny the things you remember I remember holding on to her the whole time when he forced me to the floor I couldn’t fight he was so big I didn’t understand what he was doing I’d never known pain like it before or since I remember being so scared thinking I must be really bad to be punished like this I’m now 40 and even now have only told two people what happened to me as a child by someone I should have been able to trust I’ve avoided all relationships I’m the odd one always single never dating never trusting I don’t think I will ever be normal or be able to have a relationship I found out recently that he had done the same to my mum and my aunt and… Continue reading »

My little girl

I am the mother of a girl who has been raped. we have just moved to Sweden, from another west European country. my daughter tried to make new friends in the klsine village Asljunga where we live. As an overreacted mother, I went to see the parents and whether there are certain values ​​and values. In retrospect, it turned out to be not a nice friend and had forgotten to tell the foster parents that their foster daughter is completely unleashed, and does everything that God has forbidden. This so-called girlfriend has taken my daughter to the lake, less than 500 meters from our house. Also, this girlfriend has two boys from 16 and 17 years. to make a long story short, 1 of these guys raped my daughter, every time she did not work, he pushed her under water. it has a lot of imnpact on our whole family, we are devastated. It was… Continue reading »

Them

Two times i have been assaulted . One time by someone i didnt knew and one time by someone who i thought he liked me. Was 14 when a stranger molested me. I lost myself completely I was afraid of every man But on the other hand i wanted their attention so bad . Later i realized that i was subconsciously trying to overcome my fear . I hated my body an all my relationships fell apart . It cant be true right ? It was in my mind . I am overreacting . Years of denial till it happend again . Was 17 when a boy asked to date me . I said no . He said he respected that .One day he was seating behing me and he went to get up Doing that he actually pushed his knee into my anus I was in pain . I was devasted because i let… Continue reading »