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Family rape

I’m so lost. All my life I have seen and herd stories about girls being raped, touched, all sorts of unwanted physical interaction. But never in my wildest dreams did I ever think It was going to be me. I always knew how to prevent situations like those from evolving or getting to that point. But when its someone so close to you, family even. How do you even begin to speak about it. — Survivor, age 17

Youth Sexual Harrassment

Everybody always talks about how when they got to their 16, 17, 18, and 19 years, and how they faced sexual harassment almost daily, but no one ever talks about how it starts much sooner. I’ve been experiencing sexual harassment since at least fourth grade. In fourth grade (I went to a rough school), kids were discovering twerking, or, as it was called at the time, the “booty dance” (stupid, I know, but we were fourth grade). Guys would go to the curviest girl in the grade (me) and ask them to do the booty dance for them. If we didn’t, they would threaten us. Petty little things, like “I’ll steal your homework and shove it in the toilet” or “I won’t let you out on the playground” but in fourth grade, those were awful threats. So, I learned how to twerk and entertain the boys. In sixth grade, I was walking to my desk,… Continue reading »

Rape Being Considered a “Joke”

Dear Readers, I am anonymous for a reason that me revealing this story is a danger to my life. The reason for this is because the rapist is somebody with high power. They are the son of this (something). I don’t know. I just know that for a fact that they have enough power not to get kicked out of cadets for rape. Now I will begin my story. I’m not sure if you all know but cadets actually features boarding camps. These camps each have a unique feature. The one that I went to was a 6 week camp which featured teaching others to shoot and to do some shooting yourselves. Being in a mass people camp, I was placed in a tent with 9 others who were well decent people. Each of us worked well for the first week, we were mostly good buddies. As you know, the second week was when it… Continue reading »

Abused since I was young

It all started when I was very young, just starting in school. My cousin and aunt lived with my grandparents, and we were always over visiting. One night I had to stay the night and was put in my cousins’ room, he’s 7 years older than I. He made me sleep against the wall, right next to the window without a shade. I thought I was going to fall out the window and out onto the pool. As I was almost asleep he pushed his body against the back of mine and told me to be quite. I was so young I didn’t know what to think. He next put his hand between my legs and started rubbing them. Then he pulled down my pants in the back and tired to penetrate me. I laid there for a few moments then told him I had to use the bathroom. I ran out the door and… Continue reading »

Unknown Abuse by Biological Father

I was 3, and the abuse went on for a few months. I’m 16 now and the only details I know are from papers that were used in court. My mom protected me, and got a restraining order. He was mine and my brother’s biological father, not my sister’s. He touched her too, but not as much, this stopped after one occasion, and she controlled the situation. I was too young to defend myself, and he manipulated me into thinking it was how he showed me, he loved me. I didn’t know, I was abused until my family told me, I just thought my PTSD, everyone had. It was and still is incredibly hard to process. I never got justice because the evidence wasn’t sustained so he doesn’t have to feel like it happened and I have to live with depression and anxiety etc… I recently read through all these papers, how he touched me,… Continue reading »

Childhood abuse and acquaintance rape

I wanted to mention my childhood abuse and acquaintance rape later on in the same story, believing that there is a strong connection between both. I will speculate on a subject some more as the story progresses. First that was my father, who used to tell me amazing bedtime stories after I would jump happily into my parents bed. This evening my mom was at work and I was ready for my fairy tale that turned out to be a nightmare hard for me to shake off 50 years later. Heavy, worm, sticky subject laying on my thigh. I can still pin point the exact place. Feeling of fear and confusion. Subconscious realization that something bad happened but not being able to deal with it being a child- loving and respectfully obedient to adults, to authority. Incomprehension, shame and fear of causing conflict between my parents stopped me from telling my mom. Similar situation happened… Continue reading »

Touched by my cousin

I was ten years old, my cousin was fourteen. I remember I was sleeping in his younger sisters room when he came in to see me. I remember waking up with his hand on my vagina and his tongue in my mouth. As soon as I woke up he had backed off. He told me he was looking for his DVD. I was in shock and just sat there. I couldn’t believe what had happened so I had no reply. He left the room and his younger sister was there laying beside me sleeping. For some reason I didn’t let it bother me and I went back to sleep. Later that night he came back in. He told me he wanted something from me. He was almost in tears. I knew what he wanted and I was scared. Luckily I told him that if he took a step nearer I’d scream. He left me. I… Continue reading »

Remember as a victim you have done nothing wrong

There are so many opinions. She wore a short skirt. She didn’t say no. She wanted it. Yep… I believe it can be complicated unless you are in the middle of the situation. Then it is very clear. You have said yes or no, or your body has indicated yes or no, very clearly. Historically, silence meant – I abstain. I will not partake. When did silence begin to imply consent? I was talking with a taxi driver recently and he said, from the age of 10 we had clear ideas of what was right and wrong. We knew we should or shouldn’t. There was no doubt. Maybe others were never taught the line or the lines they grew up in were changing. Daily. For me, there are many stories that I can share… many. I don’t share with my friends or family as they will see me as a victim. Then I will suffer… Continue reading »

Home from School

I got home from school, and mom was working. I was 12, and a latchkey kid. I surprised a classmate of mine, who had broken into our home while I was at school. He started it on the couch, and rapidly went for sex. I was a virgin until then. He would not stop or use any protection. He left, and it seems I was the only thing he took. When mom got home, she was mad at me, and wouldn’t call the police, or take me to be examined, or get help. He was in my classes, and I could not get out of them. I soon found he got me pregnant, and I could not concentrate. Mom tried to get me in private school, but it was too expensive. Mom took me for home schooling, and arranged for me to get an abortion. Nobody but us could know what happened. A couple of… Continue reading »

I don’t know what to think

This isn’t rape. I don’t know what it is. I don’t know what to think or feel or even how to act around him. I guess it started when my mom went on vacation and left me and my step dad at the house. He would sleep with me and I didn’t think much of it…until I would wake up in the middle of the night to him cuddling me close. He would have his leg over mine. I stayed up for hours to scared to sleep until I eventually fell asleep. Now after that everytime I would fall asleep with my mom he would touch me, not touch my private parts but he would touch my legs and I would wake up in the middle of the night to that and pretend I was still sleeping like a coward. He would always wake up the next morning and be extremely nice to me. This… Continue reading »