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I wish she wouldve helped me

My sexual assault is the one time in my life where I had no power. Runaway, say No, hit him? But It’s not my fault, I didn’t want this. Why do I have to fight against someone who is an animal? I didn’t even know this would happen. I was hanging out at a cool guys house. It was me, my best friend, and a few other people. We were all friends, but for me, I was close with a few people, but others I didn’t have their cell phone number. My close friends left around 1 am. But I wish I would’ve just gone with them. It was my first time getting drunk, but growing up I either saw a whole bunch of empty beer bottles or no alcohol at all. They offered me shots. I don’t even remember this, but apparently, I took all the shots. No one else took any. I was… Continue reading »

My year abroad

Sometimes I wonder if it was my fault…Did I say yes? I must of, right? I was studying in Rome for the academic year, what was meant to be the best year of my life. I had been at a party and obviously was drinking, a friend and I decided to go out to a new club, I was tipsy but I wouldn’t say drunk. I remember getting into the club and it being a bit weird but we just thought it might have been the fact it was during the week. My friend and I were dancing and then suddenly she went off not feeling well. She was sitting down. I carried on dancing. I think a man gave me a drink. I don’t remember leaving the club or my friend. Next thing I know i’m crying on a bed, a man is having sex with me. I felt so disorientated that it took… Continue reading »

Family

I used to live in south Korea with my parents and my two brothers (one older and one younger). My older brother died when I was very young and my parents decided to migrate overseas for a fresh new start. When we first came to Australia, we settled in extremely well and I quickly got attached to my new home. However, 2 days before my first day of high school, my mother died. So I was left with my father and younger brother. My father worked very hard to take care of us both and I even began working a part-time job to help out. This was until my younger brother also died, 2 years after my mother’s death. This was a major turning point in my life. I was diagnosed with depression and my father had been broken physically and emotionally. He began to regularly skip work and developed a serious alcohol habit, and… Continue reading »

Everyone loves him

I’ll make this short because he’s still here and I’m not going to escape. Writing this as I’m visiting with a friend because she has access to the internet and usually, I just don’t. The first time I met him I was fifteen, and it was facilitated by my mother. We come from old money, and I guess his family did too. It was a weird thing that most people nowadays might not understand, but I was being set up to marry him. I still did, anyway, because there was nothing else to do. The first time we met was at this party that my mother had suggested we both attend, but it wasn’t some fancy thing. There were tons of teens there and underage drinking was all over– he brought me what was apparently apple juice, or grape, I just remember it tasted awful. He drugged it because I can barely remember what happened… Continue reading »

My Best Friend’s Brother

A few months ago, back in February, I went through something I can’t ever forget. A little backstory, about a year ago in October, my boyfriend of a little over a year left me after telling me he wanted to marry me. I obviously was devastated and didn’t handle it well. After all, he was the young man I gave my virginity to. He was my world at that time. I started to flirt around a bit, but it was nothing more than flirting. A little after christmas I started talking to someone who was good friends with my best friend, and I happened to catch feelings for him. He was a damaged boy, but he had a good heart. I thought that maybe I could help him heal. Maybe. I misread the situation, though, and ended up being used for sex. I gave myself willingly, but it still hurt like hell. Around the time… Continue reading »

Alcohol

I recently went through a very hard time in my life and I turned to alcohol. It was my coping mechanism, it helped me through the darkness. I knew it wasn’t the right thing to do but I continued to do it against everyone’s wishes. I finally started getting better, no more showing up drunk to work, no more passing out in the middle of the road. I was getting better. Then, the night came, I drank far too much than I expected. I have never been the one to ask for a ride home. I collected myself and left the place I had been drinking. I remember walking home and hearing all the street noises, remembering voices, remembering everything until I didn’t. The next thing I remembered was waking up in my own bed. I woke up with dirt in my nails, hair, and clothes. I woke up with my shirt on backward. I… Continue reading »

Drunk and Alone

I went drinking last night with a friend and we both were there intending to pick up. We got pretty wasted from drinks these 2 brothers were buying and we went out and around back to the alley to make out a bit. After a few minutes my friend waved good bye as they went down the alley I guess to go to his place leaving us to have fun. I was a bit drifty but I remember the clear question was it okay to continue which I told him it was okay. I woke up to just as he came in me and remember telling him that was okay and he could keep going but I passed back out. Next I remember a guy trying to flip me over and I told him I’d get sick and I went to wipe my mouth and my hand was on another guys member and he wouldn’t… Continue reading »

Set Up

Hi, I’m Hailey and this is my story on how I was setup, and basically pimped out. I was set up by someone who pretended they loved me, pretended they cared when they really didn’t. This story is sort of long but each detail is relevant and important so bear with me. I was dating this guy, or so I thought I was. I thought he was my boyfriend. From the time I met him he caused trouble in my life. I was 15. He was 17 at the time (if that’s even true, I doubt it.) I was in a really bad place. I was and still am struggling with depression and anxiety and he was my escape. He encouraged me to stay out with him for days on end, while my family stayed home crying trying to find me. This happened on multiple occasions. For about 5 months we were “in a relationship”… Continue reading »

Travelling

It’s still hard to tell although quite some time passed. i was held against my will and raped for two months by a crazy guy while traveling in europe. i got left pregnant and i bleed for 2 months after my body naturally aborted. he told me he would kill me. how did it happen. he seemed like a nice friendly guy about my age, bright eyes, i went to his house where we smoked a joint that was drugged and etc…the ordeal was horrible, i thought i would die, i remember screaming and it was an apartment complex and the cops never came, i don’t know why. i got really sick with a 40degree fever and my throat got an infection and i started bleeding, we didn’t know i was pregnant i think he got scared and i told him i had to leave that i was really sick and he let me go…i… Continue reading »

Politeness Serves No One

I had just started college; this was about ten years ago. I was leaving a frat party on my own. A male friend of a friend texted me to ask what I was doing and if I needed someone to walk me back to the dorms. I had only met him once, but I was a little drunk, and he seemed nice the one time I met him. Also, he knew my friend from high school so I assumed he was trustworthy. I had a couple beers at the party. He met me outside the house, and it was dark outside. He said he had to stop by the liquor store, and he bought a six pack of Smirnoff Ice along with a couple other things. He asked if we could stop at his place first for a drink before he dropped me off at my dorm. I said sure and was fake nice and… Continue reading »