I am 17 years old and live in Canada. I was with many people from my town at a campsite 2 hours away, a tradition for all graduating students called prom camping. I had only been there about 2 hours and I had been drinking but not much. I felt extremely tired and a friend took me to his tent and told me I could pass out there and he left. It turns out the reason I felt so tired was because I had been drugged. Someone hand slipped something in my drink. When I was in the tent the next thing I remember is a guy that I knew from my school on top of me. I tried to scream, but my voice didn’t work, I tried to fight using my arms but I could not move them. I felt parlayed, but i could feel what he was doing to me. I have lost… Continue reading »
I Too Was Raped
I was raised in a very strict and religious household. In high school I would come to my mother and we would pray over the girls in my school that would have sex. I have always believed that sex is for marriage and marriage only. outside of marriage it is a sin.not just a sin, but sex is sacred and special.I wore a promise ring that was a promise to God that I was waiting for marriage.now to give a little bit of background, I grew up in such a strict environment that even at the age of 20 I did not do anything for myself. My parents took care of me. They constantly told me that they wanted to keep me “in a bubble”. This hurt me more than helped me. I understand why they did it, but it held me back so much. it instead taught me that I needed to always depend… Continue reading »
My 18th Birthday
I had been dating him for 6 or so months. We were in band together, and started dating on a band trip. Everything was innocent. I was very insecure about my feelings with boys because I was more comfortable in relationships with girls rather then boys. So even kissing and holding hands were big deals for me. I had never been touched intimately. The boy, who I will refer to as J, was a drinker. Even at only 17 years old, he was a hard drinker. He had been a bit controlling since the beginning of the relationship, always knowing where I was and who I was with. I should also mention he was very charismatic. He even had my entire family thinking he was as harmless as a fly. On the night of my 18th birthday, the day after valentines day, we were supposed to go out camping with a bunch of friends for… Continue reading »
The Devil You Know
I was raped by my brother’s best friend when I was 19. It was at my brother’s house. He was sleeping in the next room. I was extremely intoxicated. I didn’t want to get in trouble and I blamed myself for being drunk. It finally came out while I was talking to my brother’s girlfriend. They said I had to report it and tell my parents. I had already been a week. There was no hard evidence. His word against mine. I was in college across the country at the time. I decided to go back to school and forget it ever happened. Of course, that didn’t work. I was no longer myself. I was so unhappy. So depressed. I failed my classes. I decided to move home and live with my parents for a while until I felt ready to move on. Shortly after that I met a man and fell in love. I… Continue reading »
Happily Married, Rape Survivor
I am one of the lucky ones, I was blessed with an amazing man, who loves and supports me. I do not know if it has to do with the fact that he himself is also a survivor rape victim. I cannot remember at what age I began to be molested. I cannot remember who? I know that it had to be from such a young age, because my first sexual recollection was of me masterbating myself probably around six or seven, I know at that age, a child doesn’t just masterbate. It might be that my molester is someone so close that my mind still does not allow me to remember. Molestation, became a part of my life, my first actual memory of being molested was at about age 8, I remember riding in the night with family friends in he back of the wagon, while the adults were in the first rows, the… Continue reading »
We Live Part of Hell on Earth
I grew up believing that the world is a very dangerous place and i thought that after my first trauma, i would never have to deal with a similar event. When i was 6 years old, my grandfather molested me several times. it may have lasted for about a year or 2. He molested me when we were alone and when the family was together. My family never noticed anything and I never acted as though something was wrong because I did not understand fully what was going on. The first time it happened, i remember playing with this toy that when it was pulled back and released, it would roll really far.. it rolled under the couch where my grandfather was sitting. i went under the couch to get it and with his foot, he was massaging my private parts. as the weeks past, i found myself rolling that toy on purpose to find… Continue reading »
In Korea
I was living in a desolate part of Seoul. It was my second time around. I knew the contract was sketchy, and, admittedly, I pretended I’d never been there before. They told me I was living in a officetel in a building in Dongdaemun. When I arrived, it was a graying stump of a construct, and if I had been new to Korea, I would have left. A gaggle of panicky women arrived with a set of sheets and no idea why I didn’t have a cell phone. This was back before cell phones had affordable international plans. I worked illegally at a daycare. I gave them my papers and they continually assured me they were being processed. One day they sent me to Japan for re-entry and I knew my papers had not been processed. I had no working visa. The chronology is an odd thing. I don’t know when what happened exactly. I… Continue reading »
Afraid of Being Judged
When I was 18 years old I was like a lot of young women-dating, trying out relationships, making mistakes. My biggest mistake was to trust a “friend.”. We had a passionate relationship at the start. We were both college freshman, I had a long-distance boyfriend that wasn’t working out-and we became intimate though never officially boyfriend & girlfriend. He was inexperienced, and fell in love with me very quickly. Looking back, I should have seen many aspects of his behavior for the red flags that they were: he often persisted in pressing me on things when I’d already said no many times. After our first semester, when I went home for Christmas break, and spent time away from him, I had the time to reflect on our relationship. I was no longer comfortable with it. He was in love with me, but I was not in love with him. I had not yet totally broken… Continue reading »
Never a Victim; Only Myself
This is my first time sharing my story publicly. Although my story is like many others, my reactions to it, and my outlook on it, are very unique I believe. The first time I was raped, I was 18 years old. It was a beautiful night in the summer of 1999. My boyfriend was maybe a year or so older than I, but was already a father to a 3 year old from a previous relationship. He was a father, my boyfriend, and also my rapist. I had gone over to his apartment to hang out and just be together. When I got there, my boyfriend was already drinking. Not sure how many beers he had had prior to my arrival, but I thought nothing of it. We were having a conversation in his kitchen when he offered me a beer. I refused, he didn’t push. Everything was fine, just like any other couple we… Continue reading »
My Rape Stories
I was raped by my brother when I was 4 years old on more than one occasion. When I was 13 years old he approached me again in a sexual manner and asked if I would take off my shirt and bra and let him touch my chest, I was home alone and was afraid of what he would do if I refused to my relief his friends came back to my house and he was forced to leave my bedroom, I then asked his friends if they would stay the night because I was worried my brother was disturbed. When I was 16 years old, I found the courage to tell my parents unfortunately they did not believe me. When I turned 19 I moved out of my house and for a few weeks my brother had no place to stay so I let him stay with me in my apartment thinking enough time… Continue reading »