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I Am Beautiful Now

It all transpired the summer that I turned 16. This was a rough summer for me already, as it was also the summer that I had started menstruating. That’s a hard time even without having experienced such ugly things. I was a late bloomer, and embarrassed at how late a bloomer I was. I was even a little jealous of my friends who had already started experimenting with boys, when I had only had one fleeting kiss on the lips at 14. That summer was rough also because I had recently decided to refuse to take anti-depressants. I’d been on the stuff since I was 5, and decided I was just sick of taking these medications and didn’t want anything to do with them. So on top of the natural chemical changes going on in my body, I was also coming down off these awful medications, and my brain was going through all sorts of… Continue reading »

Help

I was drugged and raped by my neighbor on my way to church at age 14. He was 34 at the time. He almost killed me. He gave me a soda with drugs in it without me knowing. I woke up naked barricaded in his room paralyzed and unable to cry for help. While I was passed out he kept pumping drugs into my system. When I had not arrived home from church my brother went looking for me and asked him where I was. He claimed I was at my boyfriends house. So, my brother went there to look for me. That’s when he came back into the room, dressed me, threw me outside, got in his truck and drove away. I laid in the grass for a while in front of his house until I was able to crawl through the woods to try to get home. The drugs made me temporarily blind… Continue reading »

I Was 16

It has been with me since I’ve known. I’ve hidden it since it happened, or at least so I thought. The night it happened I will never forget. We went to a party, too young but yet responsible young girls. It was supposed to have fun fight. Something happened however. I was just turned 16. I woke up in a hotel room, could not find my clothes or purse. I was so sore I could hardly walk. I left the hotel and walked to the way of home. Having been gang raped at 16 years old, I walked for over an hour before I was offered a ride. Nobody was ever charged with my assault.

Didn’t Know Until Later

I am 25 now, and when I was from the ages of 4 to 13 I was molested by my mother’s half sister. I didn’t realize it was molestation because I found out later on in life that she had been grooming me most of my life. I finally told my mother at age 16, after many years of severe depression and suicidal thoughts, I had to go to therapy and my therapist helped me tell my mother. At age 19, I was at a friends house with a group of my male friends. We were talking and watching TV. Then they offered me vodka and orange juice. I thought ok maybe just one cup. I was distracted for a few seconds and they must have drugged me because the next thing I know I’m in a chair with a bag in my hand and the sun is out. They had put me in a… Continue reading »

Something I’ve Never Shared

My story isn’t something I’ve ever talked about, so this feels very strange to me, but I just watched Brave Miss World and I was completely moved. I was 16 when I was raped. I shudder to even say that’s what happened to me. For a very long time I’ve blamed myself, and there are still days when I find myself dwelling on the things I should have done differently. I was at a party and a friend of a friend was hitting on me, following me around. We were all drinking, which in hindsight I kick myself for, and I didn’t really think much of it when he started getting handsy. He would follow me upstairs to the only bathroom and wait for me. I’d make to go back downstairs and each time he’d request something from me before he let me get to the stairs, a hug, a kiss on the cheek, a… Continue reading »

In NYC

I just watched your documentary yesterday and I am glad to see some one CAN speak out and hear people stories. I am a 46 year old French woman who was walking in the streets of upper west side of Manhattan on May 16th when a man dining outside a restaurant with two of his male friends talked me in to having a glass of wine with them. He is in his mid 60’s and looks rich, I thought I would seat down nod get to know them as I was bored and lonely in this big city all alone. I ended up in his apartment as he was begging about how fantastic the view was from his luxurious place and about his rare champagne from France….and I fell into his trap! I remember throwing up the minute I drunk his champagne and rushed to the restrooms to throw up! Then I woke up too… Continue reading »

So Long Ago But Still With Me

More than thirty years ago I was drugged and raped by the man I was dating at the time and two of his friends. I was so numb the next day, I could not register what happened beyond the fact that I’d “lost” an entire night of my life. The following years, I would realize I had lost much more than that. Perhaps being sexually abused as a child made me numb to a man who was a predator of women. I’d lost the ability to recognize danger. I got my first flashbacks of that lost night almost twenty years later. I have received a lot of healing over the years, but I’m not sure I can really heal until this man is behind bars. But what can I do thirty years after the fact? I admire you, Linor, for speaking up. Too many women keep rape secret because they are ashamed. It helped me… Continue reading »

My Rape

I am 17 years old and live in Canada. I was with many people from my town at a campsite 2 hours away, a tradition for all graduating students called prom camping. I had only been there about 2 hours and I had been drinking but not much. I felt extremely tired and a friend took me to his tent and told me I could pass out there and he left. It turns out the reason I felt so tired was because I had been drugged. Someone hand slipped something in my drink. When I was in the tent the next thing I remember is a guy that I knew from my school on top of me. I tried to scream, but my voice didn’t work, I tried to fight using my arms but I could not move them. I felt parlayed, but i could feel what he was doing to me. I have lost… Continue reading »

I Too Was Raped

I was raised in a very strict and religious household. In high school I would come to my mother and we would pray over the girls in my school that would have sex. I have always believed that sex is for marriage and marriage only. outside of marriage it is a sin.not just a sin, but sex is sacred and special.I wore a promise ring that was a promise to God that I was waiting for marriage.now to give a little bit of background, I grew up in such a strict environment that even at the age of 20 I did not do anything for myself. My parents took care of me. They constantly told me that they wanted to keep me “in a bubble”. This hurt me more than helped me. I understand why they did it, but it held me back so much. it instead taught me that I needed to always depend… Continue reading »

My 18th Birthday

I had been dating him for 6 or so months. We were in band together, and started dating on a band trip. Everything was innocent. I was very insecure about my feelings with boys because I was more comfortable in relationships with girls rather then boys. So even kissing and holding hands were big deals for me. I had never been touched intimately. The boy, who I will refer to as J, was a drinker. Even at only 17 years old, he was a hard drinker. He had been a bit controlling since the beginning of the relationship, always knowing where I was and who I was with. I should also mention he was very charismatic. He even had my entire family thinking he was as harmless as a fly. On the night of my 18th birthday, the day after valentines day, we were supposed to go out camping with a bunch of friends for… Continue reading »