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My Ex-husband

I was married once before to a bartender with a drug problem. Many nights he would encourage me to come down to the bar and drink with him and his coworkers after closing up. Many nights I would stumble my way out of the bar after 2 drinks, make it home, and completely black out. The next morning I would always wake up with no underwear on and confused. This was a regular occurrence until I woke up with my husband inside of me. I told him to stop, and he shoved his hand over my face until he finished. For some reason, I stayed after that for 2 months. I tried to make it seem like it never happened, because I was too embarrassed to have to explain how my husband could rape me. The last straw was when we went out drinking, and he decided that he wanted to go buy some drugs,… Continue reading »


At school I was never taught about consent. I never actually realised to the extent of how little respect that society has for women and their bodies till the day my recent ex boyfriend told me that I was my fault that I was raped, because I didn’t stop it. I shouldn’t have to use brute force to stop a boy from penetrating me when I already told him no. A 17 year old girl who was never taught about consent didn’t realise at the time that rape isn’t the glamorised being pinned down in a dark alley way by a strange scary pervert at night. It is in fact that drunk boy at a party who was pushy. Part of me did think at that time that it was my fault I wasn’t aggressive enough towards him to stop. That is wrong in so many ways. I own my own body so I should… Continue reading »

Happy Birthday

I just turned 21 and i had my cousins car and my best friend was my D.D. we had lunch and i had my first legal drink and i also got a free drink from starbucks what a great start right. Im in college away from home so i kinda depended on her to find fun stuff to do. Iv’e probably been drinking since 2pm but thats still no excuse. So fast forward half a bottle of crown, tequila, and two shots of vodka later i found myself in a motel room with a blunt to lips as i normally par-toke in. Next thing i remember is a phone ringing and hands on my breast. I could barely move talk or keep my eyes open. a part of me wanted to just close my eyes because i thought i was just having a real crazy dream until i tried to lift myself up and felt… Continue reading »

Confused for Too Long

So many stories here have helped me to feel okay, so I figured I would give back in hopes that my story might comfort someone else who may have experienced something similar. I was raped when I was 17 on a family vacation, and for 8 years of my life I blamed myself. At the time I had a boyfriend, who I am still with today 10 years later and we are now engaged. However, for 8 years I did not tell him, or anyone what happened to me. I hid it in the back of my mind and often times pretended like it didn’t even happen, like it was some sort of weird bad dream. But as I started getting older, and thinking about marriage with the love of my life, I had to tell him what happened so many years ago. It went down like this: When I was on vacation with my… Continue reading »

I can’t remember if I said yes or no

I feel really embarrassed posting this, because this story is different than a lot of stories on here. But I had been going on dates with this guy and staying at his parents house and solely just falling asleep together, nothing sexual. I told him I only sleep with someone if I am in a relationship with them NUMEROUS times, and he seemed to be ok with it. I had never really partied heavily before and one night we went to a party together and I got extremely “browned” out (where you black out but sometimes come back to a conscious state), he started to get really mad that his friends liked me and were talking to me all night, so he took us back to his house even though I said I wanted to go home. I remember us kissing, which wasn’t a big deal, but I laid my head on the pillow and… Continue reading »

Me too.

I was seventeen. I remember this night like it happened a few hours ago except its a blur. I had just graduated from high school and it was the summer going into my freshman year of college. I went to a party with my three best friends. I remember there was a lot of people at the house. People of all grades were there. There was drugs: marijuana, cocaine, and pills. Its not where I belonged I had never done any kind of drug or smoked anything in high school. I remember having a beer and the next thing I know I was slumped on the couch with a gas mask on my face. I stood up so fast I collapsed and hit my head on the end of a table. My best friends who were there had also been drinking. Two of them had left with their boyfriends. I woke up on the couch… Continue reading »

Drug raped

I’ve never been superstitious. It was Friday 13th and 14th of January when part of my life was taken from me. Myself and my friend decided to go for a few glasses of wine after work. We arrived at the bar around 4pm and ordered a bottle of wine to share. We were having normal girls conversation about general things in life, a very relaxed evening. There were a group of guys at the bar and one was very attractive. My friend went to purchase another bottle and two of the guys joined us one being the attractive one. The conversation was flowing and he asked my friend if I was single, we made arrangements to meet the following evening. That was not the case. I remember the other guy saying my friend really likes you and him pouring wine into my glass. After that my friend left me and I only have flash backs… Continue reading »

I Shouldn’t Have Drank

My friend was throwing a party for me and two other friends. We all shared birthdays around the same time, so we celebrated them together. A lot of people I didn’t even speak to showed up. I was turning 15 and it was my first time drinking. Apparently I drank whole bottle of UV blue (Head Bottle). I didn’t last to long. I wasn’t feeling good so I just went into my friends living room and laid down. I VAGUELY remember walking down the road from her house with someone that sounded like they were on a skateboard. I was also recovering from a bad knee injury. I had tore my ACL and I was able to walk and slightly run but nothing TO physical. Next thing I remember was being at a park by my friends house. The park was gated so I don’t know how I got over the fence. I was in… Continue reading »

I wish she wouldve helped me

My sexual assault is the one time in my life where I had no power. Runaway, say No, hit him? But It’s not my fault, I didn’t want this. Why do I have to fight against someone who is an animal? I didn’t even know this would happen. I was hanging out at a cool guys house. It was me, my best friend, and a few other people. We were all friends, but for me, I was close with a few people, but others I didn’t have their cell phone number. My close friends left around 1 am. But I wish I would’ve just gone with them. It was my first time getting drunk, but growing up I either saw a whole bunch of empty beer bottles or no alcohol at all. They offered me shots. I don’t even remember this, but apparently, I took all the shots. No one else took any. I was… Continue reading »

My year abroad

Sometimes I wonder if it was my fault…Did I say yes? I must of, right? I was studying in Rome for the academic year, what was meant to be the best year of my life. I had been at a party and obviously was drinking, a friend and I decided to go out to a new club, I was tipsy but I wouldn’t say drunk. I remember getting into the club and it being a bit weird but we just thought it might have been the fact it was during the week. My friend and I were dancing and then suddenly she went off not feeling well. She was sitting down. I carried on dancing. I think a man gave me a drink. I don’t remember leaving the club or my friend. Next thing I know i’m crying on a bed, a man is having sex with me. I felt so disorientated that it took… Continue reading »