I am a 23 y/o male. For the longest time, the memory of my rape remained untouched in the corners of my mind. I can’t quite remember the age that I was, but based on the context clues of my memory I would put myself around age 10. I had just showered, it was morning and I walked through the house to the second level bedroom I shared with my brother who is two years older than me. I remember laying down on my stomach on top of my sky blue towel down on the bedroom floor. My next memory is of my brother commenting on the way I looked, before I know it he is behind me and he is grappling for an article of clothing that he had stolen from some classmate of his and tells me to “put it on so that I look more like a girl” In what seemed like… Continue reading »
I blamed myself for so long
Rape. That’s something that I always heard of, but never really thought that it would happen to me. Everyone assumes rape is forced and you’re being held captive, it’s not all that. When I was 14, I started dating this guy. He had asked me multiple times before if I wanted to have sex with him, I told him no and left it be. I went over to his house a lot, and this one time a few weeks later, I decided that I wanted to have sex. I was 14 and a virgin. We went to his bedroom, and we had sex. I didn’t think much of it, well every week he would ask me if I wanted to have sex, I told him no multiple times and he would keep asking. I gave in every time, and we ended up having sex every time I went to his house. This one specific time,… Continue reading »
Semper Fi
My husband is in the military, a Sergeant in the Marines(I am Terrible, I can’t remember which of the many Sergeants he is!), and we are apart for many long months while he is stationed overseas. We make a silly looking couple, as he is tall and strong, and I am tiny and weak, except for 1(more like 2) areas that keep him interested. We have been together since Jr. High, and he is the only partner that I have been with(except for a little kissing, No Further). He is a very considerate lover when he gets leave, evidence our 2 kids. When we can arrange it, we talk over Skype and it takes a load of scheduling to do it, but he has privacy cubicles, so we can talk a little dirty, or even flash him the girls to get him excited to get home. It had been a while since he had leave,… Continue reading »
I’m getting Married tomorrow
It happened the afternoon before my Wedding. I met a client at a Bar and Grill. Afterward, my car battery was Dead. I ran into an Ex-Boyfriend, who offered me a Ride home. He said he wanted to give me something for my Wedding. We pulled in around the back of my Apartment. He made some crude Suggestions, which I Refused. He reclined my seat, and got to Molest me. I repeated, “No, No, No!” and fought him. He climbed in my seat, and Pulled at my Clothes. I Screamed. He Hit me. I was Losing, so I Pleaded that he Not Rape me. He said, “No.” I asked him to at least use a Condom. He said, “No.” I Screamed as he Raped me. I Pleaded for him to Pull Out. He said, “No.” He Inseminated me. Someone took some Incriminating looking Pictures. His attack continued. He took some Pics of my Naked body…. Continue reading »
19 years later and still thinking about it
Back in 1998/1999 I was 9 years old. It is 2017 now and you would think I would just simply forget about what happened, but it never goes away. I always think about it, just never talk about it. The last few months I found myself finally having the courage on talking with a therapist about it, but after 2 months I still have not truly talked about it. I keep on going right on the edge of saying it all, but it just will not happen. So, after searching online I found this place, and I figured I would add my story. So, I was a student at Grace Christian School in Norwalk, California. Normal girl, tons of friends, nothing out of the ordinary for me. The school had this P.E. instructor, I never took the P.E. class but he also offered karate lessons after school. The lessons took place in one of the… Continue reading »
Under the light of the full moon
I am 25 now. This happened a few weeks ago. Just a week before I was reading rape statistics and thinking about how many women know their rapists. I was toying with the idea of going back to school for psychology. I have always felt drawn to people in pain, that it is my job to help whoever I can as often as I can. I smugly thought about how wonderful my community is and how that would never happen to me. But I am no stranger to abuse. My first romantic relationship was with a textbook sociopath who beat, tortured and humiliated me into submission. It took me two years to escape his clutches. After that followed a strange period of time for me. I craved the closeness of a relationship but didn’t feel that I was in any way ready for them. There was a succession of short relationships, if you can call… Continue reading »
Sexually Assaulted or Not?
I don’t want to call myself a victim or to say that I was almost raped because rape is a veery big word for me, but probably it was my fault, maybe nothing really happened, maybe something happened but it was not such a big things as I make it seem, the only thing that I know is that I can’t forget that day, I have nightmares about it, I just can’t getting out my mind. So what happened was, I was on vacations in Dominican Republic, I met some guys that were my grandma’s neighbors, they were good at first, but then they turned really sexual, specially 2 guys, one of them would always touch my inappropriately, try to pull down my pants or try to kiss me when I didn’t want to, also he would grab my hand and pull it down his pants, the other one always tried to convince me to… Continue reading »
Murky Memories
So I’m honestly not sure what to classify this as, even six full years after it happened. Over spring break my Junior year of high school, me and two of my best friends went to a “house party” hosted by a guy we’d only met twice. One of my friends had dated the host’s best friend, and we mostly went so she could talk to her ex. When we got there, it turned out to just be 8 or so guys drinking vodka. I had been drunk a few times before in my life, but didn’t at all know my limits with alcohol yet. While my one friend went to talk to her ex, me and my other friend proceeded to get ridiculously drunk. Again, we didn’t really know our limits and the guys were kind of encouraging it. I only remember flashes of the rest of the night. At one point, my friend went… Continue reading »
Sexually Assaulted Or Not?
I just keep having nightmares of this, like I have PTSD and I keep reviving things that happen to me in the past, so what happened was that I was traveling to Dominican Republic and I met this guys, they were always flirting with me and my sister, two if them always tried to touch me inappropriately, I didn’t like it but I never thought it was able to tell anyone because then I would look like a hoe, I was just scared, but I never said anything and just acted cool, but one day it went too far, so I was at their house minding my business in a room by myself, which I now realize it was not the best idea, it was very stupid, and one of the guys came in and he laid next to me, I was like “dont even try” and he said “lets just talk” (or something like… Continue reading »
Broken Girl
It all started when I was nine years old and I was sent to foster care. My foster mom had two older sons and they would each take turns touching on me and making me touch them. My foster mom would make me sleep in the same bed with them every night except when we had visitors. I left foster care when I was eleven years old. I thought it would finally be over. That following year on New Years Eve, my cousin made me touch his private area. He would tell me that when I went to sleep he would F**k the S**t out of me and put his thing in my mouth. I never told my mom because she had previously accused me of having sex with him. One day I woke up to his fingers inside me. He would talk about what he did to me with two of my other cousins… Continue reading »