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Childhood Rape

At the age of 7, I was raped by a neighbor boy. I was in the barn that was on the property of this boy and his sister who was my friend. His sister, my sister, and myself were up in the upper loft playing hopscotch. My sister and my friend didn’t want to play anymore and I did so they left the barn and I stayed to play by myself. As I was playing hopscotch, I twisted my ankle and fell. I had a difficult time getting up so I could go down the stairs and go home to my house which was across the street. As I attempted to go down the stairs, my friend’s older brother who was 18 at the time, came up the stairs and asked me what was wrong. I told him that I had twisted my ankle playing hopscotch and I wanted to go home. He told me… Continue reading »

Confronting My Step-Father

Although I was not raped by my step-father, I was sexually molested in our home when I was a teenager. For many, many years I turned my shame inward, believing I was somehow at fault. When I finally told my mother, she said that she believed me, but did nothing. (They were divorced by then.) I found out later that she had told my younger sister that she did NOT believe me, in spite of years of her witnessing his inappropriate, and misogynistic behavior to both of her daughters. I now know that she was in denial, and sadly drank herself to death rather than face the truth. Recently, while on the phone with my sister, we were both crying about what he had done to me, (she was the ONLY family member who had never doubted my accusation). It suddenly occurred to me that, here we were, years later, my sister and I, still… Continue reading »

The Pastor of My Church

I was 16 years old and still a virgin. He did not rape me – but he tried to. He engineered being alone with me by dropping other members of our church group off before me. He knew my father had just died & that mother was now an alcoholic = nobody watching out for me. This was the ugliest man in the world – pock mocked face, balding, & fat! I wrestled my way out of his car (I was scared to death!!) and ran inside to tell my mother what happened. She said “what did YOU DO to entice him? (that was a 2nd type of rape) I turned to my best friend who in turn told her parents who were deacons of this predators church. They said I was crazy, and looking for attention. They apologized years later after another girl complained about him to HER mother who DID believe her story…. Continue reading »

Overcome It

When I was a toddler a neighbor and friend of the family hurt me. I was left with the family next door along with my newborn baby brother on the day my mother’s father died. When my mother changed my diaper, she found blood and there were scratches on me. I was able to tell her “_____ hurt me down there.” They called the police and reported it but the man denied anything happened. He was never charged and I grew up living next door having to see him on a regular basis. He also exposed himself to my younger brother on at least 2 occasions that I can recall. If he were outside, I’d call my siblings inside to try to keep them safe. Over the years, I questioned whether something had happened or not because everyone acted like nothing had and no one ever talked about it. I tested my parents asking to… Continue reading »

A Difference Perspective

In 1986 I attended the Academy Of Dramatic Arts in Pasadena California, where I met someone very special. We had a fast passionate dating period full of love, respect and admiration and we talked about marriage. We lived apart and one morning while I was on my way to a part time job, she was raped. When I learned of it via phone call at work from her mother, I raced to her place, speeding all the way on the highway. My first reaction was to be with her, to comfort her, to let her know some things were not going to change. However, over the following months, I could see the walls going up between us and there was nothing I could do to stop it or even slow it down and I tried everything I could think of. I was there to support her, love her and allow her to see I did… Continue reading »

Survivor, Still Struggling

My story begins 35 years ago at home at the hands of my brother. The feeling in the pit of your stomach as you begin to think of these things is creeping up as I type. I can feel the tears behind my eyes fighting for their liberty. My brother is my mother’s favorite child, my sister and I rate a distant, very distant other number. It is not second. My brother started by telling me things like “Mom wanted me to be sure you got clean.’ as I exited the shower. You see my father worked, mostly. My mother worked. We were unsupervised a good deal of every day. I remember the first time my brother shoved a q-tip into my urethra. The blinding pain, his realization he had done something I might tell about, the blood. His fear, his threats he had not done it on purpose and I could not tell my… Continue reading »

Acceptance

He was the star football player and honor roll student at a local high school. Girls used to throw themselves at him and he rarely had to look far to get attention from anyone. I remember thinking to myself that he seemed like a jerk and I didn’t understand what the obsession was with him. My best friend began dating his older brother but her mother never allowed her to go to hang out with him alone, the stipulation was that I had to go with her almost as a chaperon. We were all in the pool in the backyard when he came out to the pool and my best friend and her boyfriend disappeared behind the backyard bushes to go and make out. I had never been kissed before but didn’t think he would try anything. He had had all the prettiest girls in the town already and I was a lanky, flat chested,… Continue reading »

Endless Shame

I was leaving in Roma, Italy. I had a daughter, she was 2 years old. Her father, my husband and I were separated. He left often for the US and left us. I thought I could have ended it. I was a working model, 27 years old with a child. I met this guy, he followed me in the street one day. It should have been a red flag then! We stated dating, after 1 month I decided to end the relationship. I called him and he said ok but I want to invite you to a party as friends. My ex-husband was in town and wanted to take our daughter so I said yes. At that party, he saw me giving my phone number to a guy I was talking to, he got really jealous. We decided to leave the party and He took a different road than taking me to my house. I… Continue reading »

My Rape Stories

I was raped by my brother when I was 4 years old on more than one occasion. When I was 13 years old he approached me again in a sexual manner and asked if I would take off my shirt and bra and let him touch my chest, I was home alone and was afraid of what he would do if I refused to my relief his friends came back to my house and he was forced to leave my bedroom, I then asked his friends if they would stay the night because I was worried my brother was disturbed. When I was 16 years old, I found the courage to tell my parents unfortunately they did not believe me. When I turned 19 I moved out of my house and for a few weeks my brother had no place to stay so I let him stay with me in my apartment thinking enough time… Continue reading »

Proud

I am a 62 year old woman in Ohio USA. When I was 17 I had a very close call but I was terrified. I was able to get away by jumping out of the moving car. I only ever told one person. I never told my family because I was ashamed and thought they would blame me. I have learned to speak out in lots of other ways about different things to educate young people. I just wanted to reach out to tell you that I wanted to hug you because you are changing lives. Continue your walk with God because he will guide where he needs you to go to do the most good. He has been a powerful presence in my life and working miracles right in front of me. If you become tired, He will carry you. Lean on Him.