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Rape

The Closet K.M.B. It was 1986. I was 19. I had a fake I.D. that I bought from the back of The Rolling Stone magazine. I was obsessed with Samantha Fox’s song, “Touch Me”. It was also the year that I was raped in a closet, in my hometown. It was a chilly Friday night in November. My best friend and I had decided to go out earlier than normal. We had hoped to be back in a few hours and catch Miami Vice. She had the young girl infatuation on Tubbs. I had one on Crockett. We entered one of our favorite bars and I was immediately approached by a man I had never seen before. In hindsight, this should have been a red flag. Our town was small and we knew virtually everyone. He told me his name was Guy. He said he had come down for the weekend to join some buddies… Continue reading »

Who am I?

Have you ever looked in the mirror and not recognise the person looking back? Lately i don’t even know who I am. I’m doing things so out of character and I don’t like it. I keep drinking on a weekend which is fine but I fail to know my limit. I get absolutely plastered and can’t remember a thing. I’ve broken up with my boyfriend of 7 years because I felt as though I’m on a downwards spiral. I feel as though I’m becoming self destructive. I know I’ve done the right thing about my relationship because I don’t love him anymore. I think after I was assaulted last year it’s changed him and me. I wanted him to get help but he wouldn’t. He became a little controlling (understandably). I think I started to rebel because of it. I wanted time on my own to rediscover my self and fall back in love with… Continue reading »

Nobody Knows

As a little girl I used to stay at my grandparents house every weekend where one of my older cousins also stayed. We played all the time and got along great. From the age of around 8/9 I remember playing with this same cousin at my dads house (I think we used to play teachers) but something started to feel different… he used to tell me to sit on the bed and play and eventually told me to lay down next to him. Me being around the age of 8 thought nothing of this and done as he said. He stared to lower his hand towards my underwear to which I remember the first time getting up and asking him to finish playing teachers with me (I think part of me knew it was wrong and didn’t want it to continue). This went on for a few weeks until one weekend he put his hands… Continue reading »

Twice

At school I was never taught about consent. I never actually realised to the extent of how little respect that society has for women and their bodies till the day my recent ex boyfriend told me that I was my fault that I was raped, because I didn’t stop it. I shouldn’t have to use brute force to stop a boy from penetrating me when I already told him no. A 17 year old girl who was never taught about consent didn’t realise at the time that rape isn’t the glamorised being pinned down in a dark alley way by a strange scary pervert at night. It is in fact that drunk boy at a party who was pushy. Part of me did think at that time that it was my fault I wasn’t aggressive enough towards him to stop. That is wrong in so many ways. I own my own body so I should… Continue reading »

Broken

I’m so broken I can’t be fixed. They just don’t know it yet. The man who knew everything about me makes me sad. I feel as though the only reason I was born was to witness the three incidents. I’m too damaged to fix!! — Dee, age 48

Had Her Back

A friend and I went to a party, and we went as a pair to watch out for each other. My friend drank too much and was passed out on the living room couch, I was okay. She was still out as most of the guests left, or paired off somewhere. I watched over her, except when I had to use the bathroom. I was only gone a minute, but I came back to her naked on the couch being raped by a guy I didn’t know, with another waiting! I yelled for them to Cut It Out! The free guy came at me an punched me repeatedly in the gut until I fell to the floor. He ripped my clothes, and pulled me to my knees so he could rape me too but from behind so I could watch the others. They laughed alot, especially as they each finished, and when they left. I… Continue reading »

It wasn’t my fault

It was my friends staggett and we crashed at her house after a fun night of celebrating her upcoming marriage. I fell asleep on her couch only to be awoken around 5:30am by her fiancé trying to unbutton my pants. I froze at that moment trying to figure out a way to get out of the situation without causing to much of a stir. I finally found the nerve to ask him what time it was and while acting like nothing weird was happening to push past him and bolt from the house leaving everything including my shoes behind. I have never told anyone and we still hang out with that couple from time to time. I understand that it’s complicated to understand if it’s never happened to you but it’s wired how you act out of character just to avoid the situation. It makes me very sad that we take on the shame. —… Continue reading »

Time To Tell

February 21st, 2017 . I (15) got into a friends car(17) . he was high as a kite. we drove through my town just fooling around like teens do. we went down this road i asked him to turn around and take me home because i had a strange feeling. he said everything was fine not to worry. The road was a dead end. he parked the car and we were making out, he asked if i wanted to have sex i said no. He then pinned me down to the seat, i couldn’t move, i froze. i was screaming,yelling; “Please stop” “i don’t want to”. he didn’t listen. after that he took me home. i got ready for a cheer event and went as everything was normal. It wasn’t till a few days later it finally hit me , what had happened but by then it was too late. he has done it to… Continue reading »

3 balls, striking

#MeToo Posting with friends. I was Date raped by 3 boyfriends in a row who got tired of waiting for me. Eventually, I found a guy who waited for me, and we had a good relationship.

Keep it to myself

One afternoon I walked home from the bus, to find my brother and 2 of his friends watching a porn. They made rude comments about I’d look good like that. I tried to go to my room, but they tackled me. They all raped me, but technically, my own brother was my first! There was no protection, so I got lucky, so to speak. I told my mother, who refused to believe me. As punishment, they did it again, and another time just cause, before I went to hang out instead of coming home.