When I was younger, my brother would sexually harass me. He would call me names like “slut” or “bitch”. He would also pull on my underwear or hit my butt…sometimes even when other people were around. It was humiliating. I was 13 but I felt powerless to stop him. Then when I got a little older he started to hit me, threaten to hit me and called me even worse names. He told me I was lucky my family actually kept me around because no one loved me enough to take care of me. I never told my mother because I thought she wouldn’t believe me. While I’m aware that what happened to me isn’t the worst thing in the world, it was still humiliating and traumatic to live with.
— Survivor, age 18
Dear survivor – please don’t minimize what happened to you. The humiliation you’re feeling is no “better” than what anyone else feels and you deserve so much love and compassion. I obviously don’t know you or your family but I want so much to believe that what he said about them isn’t true. That THEY are lucky to have YOU around. I *do* know that you deserve to be loved and cared for and safe because everyone does. I would encourage you to talk to someone about what your brother did. If you’re comfortable maybe a family member or a close friend you trust. If not, maybe start with a rape crisis hotline (yes you can call them. I promise). Or maybe you can find a therapist to work with you. YOU DESERVE IT and I know you can heal from all of what you’re feeling. All of which is valid and allowed and ok. Love, Alexis