I first met my ex boyfriend in elementary school in a “special” class when I was in 1st grade and he was in 2nd. We lost contact until I was a sophomore and he was a junior. We were pretty good friends for a while and he had a girlfriend for a while. Summer vacation had just started and we decided to go to the movies and hang out at the fire house he volunteered at. We made out and it was my first kiss. As much as I hate admitting this, I’d be lying if it wasn’t anything but amazing. We dated for a month before we decided to end things and remain as friends. Over the next few months, we got into major fights over petty things and he began belittling me.
One night in March 2013, he asked me if I wanted to hang out. I said yes and I had an 11:30 curfew. I told my parents we were going to Dunkin Donuts by our high school. We really went to our school’s parking lot and started making out. He said “I brought you here to fuck.” I reluctantly said ok and we got into the backseat. I started getting really scared and I said I just wanted to make out. He said “stop being a baby. You said yes.” I told him stop and let’s just make out but he started thrusting on top of me. I begged him to stop and luckily a cop showed up and told us to leave. I was too scared to say anything to the cop out of embarrassment and fear. He took me home and there was bright red blood in my underwear and I told my parents that I had gotten my period. I was too scared to tell them what we really did and he had used a condom. After I asked him for answers, he said I “asked for it” and I wasn’t “raped”.
2 and a half years later, he still denies raping me and claims that he doesn’t remember that night. I was just two weeks shy of my 17th birthday. It was supposed to be a happy and exciting time in my life when I felt like I was holding a burden. Today, I am a freshman in a college studying digital communications at a small school outside of Philadelphia. I’m on the dance company and I’m proud of the person I am today. Meanwhile my rapist is working at the local movie theaters and isn’t even in college. I’m a fighter. I’m beautiful. I’m a survivor.
“I’m a fighter. I’m beautiful. I’m a survivor.” – Those words are the most beautiful and empowering words I have ever heard. Your words will have an incredibly powerful impact on survivors who read your words. I hope that all survivors find that these words represent their truth. Thank you for sharing your story and your power, strength, and resilience. You are the meaning of the words brave.