Everything started of age 7 and lasted up to when I had turned 12. It’s a hard thing to talk about now that I look back at it, but if I learned one thing, it’s that releasing all that negativity helps spread light into oneself. At such a young age, something so precious from me was stolen, my innocence. My grandfather used to touch me inappropriately and tell me things I didn’t want to hear. He’d make me touch him in places. He’d reveal things that should not have been told to a child. One day I had enough and told my family about it, it was a long time before I had told anyone, but we decided not to press charges due to the illness my grandma was suffering at the time. That was the last time I had talked about that subject since it made me feel uncomfortable. My mother mentioned that he’d do similar things to her when she was a child and to my aunts which brought me comfort knowing that I wasn’t at fault for his actions, but was also very scary since I realized even the closest people can cause so much harm. I see him at times, but I’m 18 now, so I learned to forgive and forget. I pray to god he doesn’t do anything to any more kids. I never let my younger sisters around him without close supervision. I hope he changed. I really do.
— Survivor, age 18
Survivor, you are such a HERO – speaking up when so many family members couldn’t and protecting your younger sisters from harm. You are also so wise to know that what happened was not your fault!Even though you are handling it all with such wisdom you should still consider talking to someone, a therapist, maybe take other members of the family. I am sorry to say this but the odds are against your grandpa stopping of his own accord, especially because he has had very few consequences. You may have had your innocence taken but not your courage and wisdom and potential for a great life – keep up the good work!
Dear survivor – thank you so much for sharing your story here. You’re absolutely right that healing takes time and I think you’re well on your way. You’re completely correct – his actions are his responsibility and what he did to you IS HIS FAULT!!! I’m so grateful to read that you are protecting your sisters but I want to be very clear – anything he does in the future or has done is STILL NOT YOUR FAULT.
I will say that just because it’s uncomfortable for you to talk about doesn’t mean you shouldn’t. I really think that talking about it can help you process what you’re feeling and help you move forward. The realization that someone closest to you can hurt you is really scary and having someone to talk to about that and help you deal with that can be really important. You can heal and deserve to heal. Sending you lots of love and support!! Alexis