I am currently 15. A freshman in high school. I excepted my first year of high school rough, but never this bad. Just 2 weeks before school was supposed to start I was raped. It was by a friend. Somebody I trusted. We we all over at his house just hanging out. A bunch of us. Swimming and having fun. People started to slowly leave but I decided to hang around longer. He asked if I wanted to hang out in his room. I knew it was a bad idea. I was 14 and never even had my first kiss, little alone been in a boys room alone with them. But I said yes. We hung out and he started to get touchy. I was uncomfortable but didn’t say anything. I didn’t want to be rude. Things happened fast. He pushed me back on the bed and kissed me. I was shocked. I froze. Once he started to move his hangs around I then started squirming but he pinned me. I wasn’t dumb or naive. I was aware what was most likely about to happen. I started crying and begging him to stop. He just told me to “shut up” I was helplessly sobbing. Once it was all over he left the room. Leaving me. I gathered my clothes and walked home. I was crying all the way home. I felt wrong. I didn’t tell anybody. I was embarrassed. I though nobody would understand. Then I slowly started blaming myself. Maybe I led him on, maybe if I fought back harder it wouldn’t have happened, if I left earlier. I kept it all to myself. Isolated myself and started failing my first year of high school. I’m still dealing with it. I’m still scared it will happen again. I go to school with him. I don’t know what to do.
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you need to tell the proper authority’s about this. if you haven’t yet tell family. you need to tell someone and remember. its not your fault.
You have to tell someone…This is not something to keep a secret…Keeping it in will not help you..That boy will go and do that OVER n OVER he is a real rapist…Good luck please tell someone and make it right❤
Hi – first I just want to say that what happened is NOT your fault. You didn’t lead him on and you told him to stop. It was HIS bad decision. Freezing is a common response to trauma; that does NOT make it your fault. I would encourage you to tell someone. But “someone” is a really broad term – so maybe a friend or a family member you can trust or a therapist. Maybe even calling a rape crisis hotline which is anonymous, You took a great first step by posting here and I am really proud of you. Deciding to call the police is a really personal decision and you are in control of whether to do that or not. Telling your story can be really hard and sometimes you have to take it in really small pieces, but it can be really healing. You can get through this. I believe in you. Love, Alexis