I came home from school, funny because it was the same time everyday from the same bus.
I walked in our house, and down the hall. The door was open so I could see my Dad was on top of my 5 year old sister, between her legs, and attempting sex.
When our Mom passed, she made me promise to do anything to protect my sister. Being 12, I told our Dad to leave her alone.
He could have it from me instead.
I went to his room, so we could have our rooms to go safely, and got on his bed, removing my underwear. Dad had no issues exchanging partners.
When he was finished, I took a shower, and started dinner like nothing was new or different.
I treated it like a house chore. Whenever Dad wanted, I would go to his room, and then went to whatever I had to do next. Never outside the house, or outside his room, for threat of my breaking my silence and cooperation.
We did this until I was 20, the night before his bypass, and he had never touched my sister. In the morning he went in the hospital, and by evening he was gone.
My sister hugged me a while, being we were alone, with only each other. She hugged me again without saying what it was for.
— Survivor, age 24
My heart really goes out to you and your sister. two beautiful little girls should NOT have had to go thru this. I hope that you will get someone to talk to, and your sister also – a counselor because when a parent does something this wrong, a crime to their child many feelings can come that you do not deserve such as guilt, shame etc – even though you are GOOD and did NOTHING wrong. I know you are a hero to your sister but it’s still unconscionable what happened. i hope that you and your sister can overcome this crime committed by someone you should have been able to trust, and I know you will have the strength to gain the life you wish for and deserve that you will make for yourself with your own power. Stay strong !
Dear survivor – I don’t even know where to begin. I can not imagine the strength it must have taken to tell your father to stop hurting your sister. What he did to you for all those years was NOT YOUR FAULT! It doesn’t change the fact that you are a strong, selfless, kind woman who deserves to heal and move forward. I would encourage both you and your sister to talk to a therapist about your father. They can help you to heal and to work through everything you feel. It sounds like you lost your mother young too and that couldn’t have been easy. You took on so much at such a young age and now it’s time for you to heal, move forward, and get the support you so deeply deserve. Sending you love, Alexis
I was also molested by my biological father. I was abused by him from birth (as far back as i can possibly remember) until i moved out when i was 14. I have had years and years of working through my childhood issues and now am happily married with children.
You can get through. You can overcome this. You are not destined to be an abuser. You are not destined to be attracted to abusers. You do not need anything from anyone else to do this. You have everything you could possibly need inside yourself. You are not ruined. You are not doomed. You are not wrecked beyond repair. You are a beautiful person with an incredible future. You are now an adult. You get to decide. You get to choose yourself. You get the say.
If you are inside this house at this time. If you are underage and are going through this RIGHT now. Please please please get help. Ask someone to help you. Call the police. Tell the police about your life. Tell a friend dad or mom or a teacher.
You have to stand up for yourself. I know its the hardest thing on the entire planet. But you have to. You have to stand up for yourself. You HAVE to be brave! You CAN be brave! I believe in you!
For all the girls out there who may be reading this, you are not alone.
Others have overcome your struggle, and you can too.
I am writing a book about my life, to be the lighthouse for others in the dark.
It is okay. It will be okay. I believe you and i believe in you.