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I think my “boyfriend” raped me

I’m 16. I’ve been basically dating this guy for a few months.. we just haven’t made things official. Almost every time were alone we end up having sex. On Valentine’s Day he invited me to go out to east with him so after school he picked me up and we left. He said he had to get something from his brothers house so I just said okay. When we got there he invited me inside and asked please so I went with him. We went in and he pushed me against the wall, kisses me and eventually we make our way to the bedroom. He began trying to take my pants off and I said no, then he repeatedly did it again and I continued to say no. Eventually I gave up and he gets them off. I tried pushing his hand away and saying no but he continued. Eventually I gave up and just cooperated, doing everything he said to do… He always jokes around about rape and stuff and when I told him how I felt the next day, saying that I really didn’t want to and that I felt like he forced me to. He apologized and said that he knew he joked around but he never really meant to rape anyone especially not someone he loved so much. Also saying that when he read how I felt that he threw up because of it. I just don’t know what to think.. or what to even say to him.. or even call it.

— Survivor, age 16

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