It was my senior year of highschool and we were finally headed to mrytle beach for senior trip. I was 17. We had “trusted” friends we were heading down with most being the popular boys of our school and only 4 girls including myself. I thought I could trust my friends, I thought I was able to let loose because I’d be safe. One of those days my friend and I decided to stay in the condo and drink because everyone was headed out. We drank to much and blacked out until late that day “once everyone arrived back”. Little did we know they had come back during our blackout. Nothing was said about this until we arrived back from our senior trip. I was notified shortly after that a video was circulating of me having sex with someone I was unaware of during the time I was blacked out. To this day I have never felt more violated in my life. In response I was called a whore, slut etc when I had no control over the situation.I never saw the video as I informed those who were passing it around that I would report them to the authorities. All rumors stopped. I should have done more because this boy has violated many other girls since my mishap. This was 5 years ago and I’m still haunted. Speak up for yourself. Being drunk isn’t an excuse to be raped and being popular doesn’t exempt a person from being a rapist & condoning the rapists’ decision. I was unconscious. I thought it was my fault…. it wasn’t.
— Survivor, age 23
Dear survivor – you are absolutely right that what happened was NOT your fault!! There is never an excuse for anyone to touch someone without their consent. Please don’t think that you should have done more; you did the best you could with what you could do at the time.
I would strongly encourage you to talk to a therapist about what you’re feeling and what’s “haunting” you. It can be so helpful to have a trained voice to give you ways to cope with what you’re feeling and help you feel stronger. I’m really proud of you for speaking up for yourself here and I wish you love and happiness and peace! Love, Alexis