I was at a small party one night, and got super drunk. I didn’t think I had drank that much, so it makes me wonder if someone put something in my drink because of how fucked up I got. Anyway, this guy was all over me all night. I can’t remember everything that happened, but I remember waking up and he had his hand down my panties and he wouldn’t quit touching me. When I woke up he stopped but then when I’d wake up again he was doing the same thing. Then he grabbed my hand and kept putting it down his pants. And I kept trying to move my hand away but he would grab it again and literally force me to touch his junk. I don’t even know if this is considered sexual assault or anything, I just can’t stop thinking about it because it makes me feel so gross and violated and it just is bothering me. And I feel so stupid that I got so drunk that I couldn’t even make him stop doing what he was doing.
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So there is a technical definition of sexual assault – but I don’t want to advise you on that because I’m no expert and I don’t propose to be one. I will say this though: no one has the right to touch you in a way that you don’t want to be touched. It’s not ok. It doesn’t matter if you are drunk or stone-cold sober. Your drinking does NOT give him the right to violate you or make you do anything you don’t want to do. What happened to you is NOT YOUR FAULT. Talking to someone about it – a counselor or a friend – can help you with these feelings and make sure they are validated in the way you deserve. I wish you love, support, and healing. Love, Alexis
Yes this is sexual assault. Sexual assault is any sexual activity (touching, kissing, penetration) that is done without the consent of the other person. When you are under the effect of alcohol or drugs, you cannot legally consent to any sexual activity. Sexual assault of any kind is a crime. It is never your fault. All you did was get drunk. Getting drunk does not mean you are asking to be touched by anyone. The only person who is to blame for sexual assault is the assaulter. Thank you for sharing your story!