I’ve never told anyone my story- I brushed it to the side, hoping I’d find strength in myself to forget. I have a little sister, she needs someone to look up to- It can’t be me when I’m suffering.
This exact day a year ago, my life changed forever- I was raped from a boy at a nightclub in my own house. I have zero motivation to get out of bed today- what do i have to get out of bed for? My boyfriend cheated on me and left, my friends have all gone to uni and I was sexually assaulted at the age of 18.
Nothing seemed to make me feel better- Suicidal thoughts came into mind, so i ran myself a bath and I lay there for 6 hours. I got out, proud I hadn’t damaged my skin and got back into my pajamas. When my sister came home, smiled at me and asked if I was okay… that’s when I knew- I’m going to be okay. This little girl is my motivation and my reason to get out of bed in the morning. My family and friends- just because I’d been through hell doesn’t mean I have to miss out on my life. Yes, every day gets harder trying to live with yourself but yes, everyone is there and you’re not alone, making it that little easier.
I am now a damaged 19 year old girl, physically and mentally- but it happened and made me who I am… I am me.
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So much brave women. God bless you and God throw him in the hell and gave him punish such like as he do with you.
Hey what happened to you is your past. Don’t let it to destroy your present and future life. Each day is a new page fill it with something that will make you and others happy. It’s not easy I know but its not impossible. I believe in you. You can do it.
Not forgetting takes a lot of strength. Surviving, which is exactly what you did, takes strength. You are absolutely not alone but what happened to you is NOT your fault. I would strongly encourage you to find a therapist to talk to; they can help you with techniques to get out of bed and function through the day. And I believe that eventually they can help you heal and feel whole. You are not damaged; you are hurting, which is completely valid but I believe in you and I believe you deserve peace. You might also consider talking to a friend or a family member you trust, if you can think of one, because holding on to this all alone is such a heavy burden to carry. You are very brave and I believe in you. Love, Alexis