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It never seems like Rape to me

Let me start with a Thank You to Linor, the ladies at Brave Miss World, and the Women who Post. Sometimes it could be a small thing, but being there effects so many!

I was 10, almost 11 when it happened. I was very well developed for my age, actually, any age! I was playing at my friend’s family home, and it had just stopped raining, and most had gone outside.
Her mother had moved out, and they were in the process of divorcing. I found out later that she had been caught cheating.
I had to use the bathroom, and when I left, her father was waiting and asked me to come into his room. I don’t know what I expected him to want, but I guess I was too young to think that way.

He played with my body, and then took off my clothes. He told me to lie on the bed, and then started the intercourse.
It wasn’t like in the movies with screaming, and crying, and lots of pain. Maybe because I was in cheerleading, I was more flexible than most. It felt unusual, almost good, except I was a little embarrassed at being naked, but he was too.
After he was finished, he cleaned me off, and made me swear to keep it a secret. He gave me some money. These 2 acts made me feel funny, not having sex with him!

I knew this was wrong, but he continued on other visits. He would take pictures, and then video. Yes, i know the words for what he was doing, as we continued until I was 15. In talking to her, he did not exploit his daughter, as one might expect.
He stopped after his daughter was raped in the necking lane by an older man. I guess it made him look in the mirror.
I was in High School, so this change did not leave me unwanted.

I am not embarrassed by this history. Posting anonymously protects him, and his daughter’s privacy.

Survivor- Age 20

1 comment

  • Alexis

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