You were the big brother I never had, the one I looked up to and trusted. I just wanted to relax that night, so I took a pill. You will never know how scared and confused I was when I finally understood what was happening. Your hands were in my pants and you tried to kiss me, all the while telling me that I couldn’t tell anyone what you were doing. When I finally said “no” enough, you would back off but always return a few minutes later. I blew off the incident for a while because it wasn’t rape, and I didn’t believe that I deserved to feel scared and hurt. You are my best friends 20 year old brother and my next door neighbor, how do you justify violating me like you did?
I am a 16 year old female who was sexually assaulted by her best friends brother. There were other males around when it happened and nobody tried to stop it. We were all high, and they all used it as an excuse for what the assaulter did. After the attack, I couldn’t eat, sleep or be around people. My whole life was consumed with images of what had happened. Because my best friend was his sister, and he lived right next door. I was constantly around him and I quickly fell into a depression. 4 months after it happened I decided to tell my best friend about her brother. She then told her parents and her whole family took her brothers side. Having the people you consider family turn on you makes you rethink all of the good memories you have with them, and makes it impossible to create new ones. I recently told my parents about the incident, and it has ruined our relationship. My parents are alcoholics and recently had a run in with the police. They decided to tell the police everything while they were wasted. One of the police officers had the audacity to tell me that my case of sexual assault wasn’t a crime. This has caused me to lose faith in the justice system. My story is still an on-going recovery and doesn’t have a happy ending, but please feel free to comment for support or if you need to talk. Thank you for reading my story.
— Survivor, age 16