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My First Memory

I was 8 years old. I am now 19. My mom was a single mom with two kids my brother and I. I had never met my dad but little did I know I was going to meet him soon and it was going to be horrifying. My mom told us we were going to take a trip since she had to leave (she is in the army). She asked us would we like to stay with our dad and my brother and I jumped up in excitement.

A few days went by and my dad showed up I remember exactly what he looked like. He was dark he had two gold front teeth and he said “how y’all doin.” A big smile ran across my face. My mom left us with him and I met his new wife my step mom. She showed us her two kids a girl that was half my age and a boy that was a year older than me. I was even more excited to meet my new siblings. We left the state and went to his house and I met my new siblings. My half sister was so excited to let me see all of her barbies and my step brother was kind of awkward.

Everyday we all played with toys and it was so much fun but after about 2 months everything changed. My dad left for work and so did my step mom. My step brother was in charge of us. He was laying in bed so I got up and ate and he walked him and spilled a drink and told me to clean it up so I did. He walked close to me and shoved his penis in my face and I pushed him away and got upset and he said “my bad”. I thought it wasn’t going to happen again, but little did I know that was just the start of my horrific trip.

Day 2
Everyone left but this time he was laying on the couch he forced me down and said “let’s play.” I wiggled around be free and he grabbed my hips and pulled me close and started trying to stick his fingering in me. My little sister and brother tried to get help but he locked them in a room. I cried as he touched me and he grabbed me by my throat and said “if you tell anyone I will kill you” I didn’t know what to do.

Day 3
The same morning routine happened and today my step brother was in the bathroom. I didn’t know he was hiding in the shower. I thought he had left to his friends but he was hiding behind the curtain. I go in there and use the restroom and then he jumped out and laughed and said “I scared you. I know it.” I was scared that he was going to touch me again. That day he didn’t do anything I was so happy.

Day 4
Everyone left as usual and today was the worst day of my life. This day destroyed me in so many ways this day took control of my life.

I was on the couch my step brother walked in and said “I’m done playing games.” He ripped my pajama pants off and threw my favorite stuffed animal away that my mom had bought me before she left. He bent me over and began to rape me. Tears running down my face, my little brother and sister again tried to help but couldn’t. I kicked as hard as I could and screamed finally he stopped and said “I know you liked it because I liked it. It felt good” I became very angry and I ran to the phone and called my mom. She didn’t answer and kept calling and she finally answered and I told her what happened their was a long pause. I heard my mom crying so strong I never have heard her cry. She said “sissy I’m going to call your daddy. Everything will be oka.y” I always felt better when I heard my mom talk. My dad then came home, called the cops, and my step brother went away for I don’t know how long. My mom didn’t want me to be to wrapped up in everything.

I let that control my life for a long time but now I am taking control over my life. I am moving on from it I cannot let this monster control my life anymore. I feel good letting it out and I’m glad I got justice. I’m glad I spoke out I feel new and reborn for a while. I thought it was my fault but it’s not I want to tell everyone that’s scared and nervous to reach out and be that person the prevents one more sexual assault. Do not let these monster roam the streets put them to rest.


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