My Story

When I was 2 months shy of turning 13 I was raped by a private tutor who used to come to my home to give me private lesson so that i could excel in school. He was a 36 year old pedophile who used to teach science in the school I used to attend. My parents had travelled away to USA at that time leaving me under the care of my aunt. That was the opportunity he taken to rape me twice. He told me that its game that play by adults and that he loved me and was like the game between husband and wife. When my parents came back from the States I never told them what had happened because I was told not to do so and that everyone would believe that it was my fault, that I had somehow seduced him. That year I had failed out of the grade and my parents had to transfer me to a different school. The rapist who was still teaching in the same school I was attending had told my father there is some wrong with your daughter (referring to me), she says she cant study thats why she failed.As a result I had lost my self confidence, my childhood, my innocence and friends.As a child i was always scared who would find out what had happened to me. As a teenager I was so much in emotional pain that I never smiled, never connected with my body, gained weight. I subconsciously hated myself and my body. In my 20s I cut my arms with glass to let the pain out and to torture it. I even tried to commit suicide. I never acknowledged my experience or my pain. Neither was I ever I helped by my family, because they didn’t know how to .It has been a long journey in reclaiming my life, but I still see the affects of incident that happened to me 28 years ago. Thank you very much for allowing to share my story, a process that helped me heal a little bit more.

— Sarah