I need to tell you guys about something significant that happened in my life. I hope you all will read this.
What happen to me happen to a lot more people than we think because what happens to me happens to four-fifths of the population has experienced the same thing as me and most of the time it is never spoke of.
Okay so most of you know me but if you don’t my name is Jena Schaefer and I am currently 16 years old I’m from Wabasha, MN and I now suffer from Depression, Anxiety and PTSD. Most of you are probably wondering why or what happened or even how could a 16 year old suffer from those things already she’s not even an adult. I’ll tell you how but first I want to explain how my life was. When I was 15 years old I had a so called “normal” life. I had my best friends. I had a boyfriend and the best thing of all my best friend were considered to be a part of my family. Like literally family we stayed at each other’s houses constantly and we even had toothbrushes at their house.
To continue, I went to school, Wabasha-Kellogg. February 18, 2015 just like I normally would not know my life was about to change forever. It was the end of the day and I had to ask my mom if I could stay after so one of my friends and I could film some homework for Spanish class. My mom said “Yes, I will be there at 5:00 to pick you up!”, so that was all settled and now it was time to work. It was about 3:10 when him and I started to film in the “Green Room”, It was a secluded room with a couch for filming purposes. By the time it reacted 4:00 we had gotten done with a couple of assignment and started to work on another. Out of nowhere he goes over and shuts the door and turns off the light. I couldn’t see anything because there was only one window and it led to another room. All of a sudden, he pushes me down onto the couch and got on top of me and because to kiss me. I was tell him to stop and I was trying to push him away but he was so mu ch stronger than me and he just pinned me down. I kept on moving trying to get up but the time I did 5-10 minutes have passed. When I stood up I tried to get to the door but WAM! it was like I was playing football and got tackle. He slammed me hard up against the wall, it took my breath away. I thought oh my god he is never going to let me go. He had his hand under my shirt and was trying to!” but he wouldn’t. About 20 minutes had passed by now and I was still fighting my hardest and I was hitting him and trying to hurt him so I could get away. Finally, he said fine and let me go I grabbed my stuff and ran out of the room to my locker. I grabbed my things out of my locker and then he showed up right next to me and he grabbed my winter coat and I ripped it out of his hand and ran to the lobby were there would be other people. From that moment on, I can’t remember a thing the next two weeks of my life was just missing!
On March 1, 2015, I finally told my parents that I was sexually assaulted by my best friend. They called the police immediately. A police officer came over to my house and questioned me about everything that happened. One of his questions was “Have you had any contact with him outside of the school?”, and from that moment on I realized something. I couldn’t remember anything from the past two weeks! My mom and dad was trying to refresh my memory about her being really sick during that time, but I had no recollection of it. The next day I returned to school and found out he was arrested and take to the Juvenile Federal Prison in Red Wind, MN. A police officer had me show him the room that I was Sexually Assaulted in and we found that the wall he slammed me up against had split in had literally split in half from the ceiling to the floor. On March 3rd only three days later I ended up in the ER because I wanted to end my life. I got a message on Faceboo k from one of my other friends and he started bashing me while I was laying in a hospital bed. My mom took my phone and told him she will report this to the police for harassment. I ended up in Generose, a mental hospital, in Rochester, MN and started to get help. I got out on March 10th during the morning and about half way home my parents said to me “We need to tell you something, he got released from the Juvenile Federal Prison.” I started shaking and crying asking “Why would they let him out”? I started going to a therapist in Rochester twice a week. I tried to return to school but I was so scared it was going to happen again, something bad did happen I lost all my friends from that school. Luckily, I still had one friend, he was from Rochester. I tried to comprises with the school but I couldn’t bring myself to go back to that school, so I did school work from home the rest of the year. It was so hard to concentrate because I constantly had the incident run through my mind. I started becoming suicidal, with that I began to cut on my thigh and after about of week of cutting I finally told my mom I need help because I don’t want to be here anymore. I went to Generose at the beginning of May again.
Once I got out of Generose I had to meet with my attorney. He decided to drop my case because there wasn’t enough evidence. That wasn’t the worst part, when my attorney told my parents and I he was smiling like he was happy he was dropping the case. When I found out I ran out of the building crying because I felt like everything I went through by telling someone was all for nothing. At that point I completely felt like giving up, I didn’t want to be alive anymore at all. I was so mad and sad at the same it was driving me insane. Furthermore, I went to my family doctor and had my depression and sleeping medication upped. A week later at about 11 o’clock at night I got up off the couch and went to take my first step up the stairs and I blacked out. Supposable my sister ran and got my mom and dad and I remember waking up in my mother’s arms at the bottom of the stairs with her trying to find a pulse. I was rushed by ambulance to the ER and we fo und out it was my medication the made my blood pressure drop. They did this standing and sitting test on me when I stood up my blood pressure to 30/40.
Summer came and I decided to go down to southern Wisconsin and stay with my brother every other two weeks. I had my rough periods during the summer but then it was time to figure out what I wanted to do about school. I decided I wanted to join K-12 Minnesota Virtual Academy. I found out what my class schedule was for the year and I was surprise because I found out that my school lied to my parents and I, they never passed me for any of my classed for the last quarter of school. So this school year I have to retake all of those classes for a whole semester. In addition, that means I am behind in credits for high school so I have to take extra classes to make up those credits.
Finally, on 10/1/2015 I realized why should I let being Sexually Assaulted affect my life in a negative way anymore I don’t want to be so sad all the time and constantly ask myself why did this have to happen to me. Now I finally know what I can do with my experience in a positive way. I am going to share my story and let people know that have hurt by someone that they are not alone. I am going to stand up as a Sexual Assault survivor and say it does get better, you just have to fight for yourself and never give up. I know that the guy that did this to me will most likely do it again to another person. All I have to say, is speak up right away and never give up on yourself!
— Jena Schaefer, age 16