Things with my ex-boyfriend ended really badly, after we broke up I had gotten into a relationship with this amazing girl but he befriended her and she ended up cheating on me with him. When they got into a relationship I was worried about her because of my history with him – during my relationship with him, he would pressure me a lot to do things I didn’t want to. He’s two years older than me and this girl. When they broke up he blamed me, and whenever I saw him he would be inappropriate and threatening. I was 15 the first time he raped me.
I was walking home and he asked me to talk inside his house. I refused but he grabbed onto my arms and dragged me inside before I could draw anyone’s attention for help. He forced himself on me, repeating phrases about how I “deserved it” and “brought it on myself”. Each time he did it after that, would be more violent and more rough and the bruises would be worse, but always in places no one would see.
I just have to get through the next two years and then I’ll never see him again. I just have to get through the next two years.
Thank you so much for sharing your story here. I want to make sure you hear that you DID NOT DESERVE WHAT HE DID TO YOU, nor did you bring it on yourself. I know you can get through this because even from your writing I can tell how strong you are. I would encourage you to try to find a counselor to talk to who can help you work through what you feel when you see him. It must be so awful to see him but sometimes a therapist can give you good coping mechanisms to make it a little less awful. Please know that I believe you and you are not alone. You can do this and you are so brave. Love, Alexis