It all started when I was quite young 8 years old..I was raped by my own cousin and not once every time I came to visit the house with parents he raped me..I was naive enough and at such a tender age I knew that something was wrong.. But didn’t knew how to talk about it..in fact i certainly knew nothing about rape ..it continued till i was 14 years..time passed and so does the memory..i thought it was over and i forgot about the past..but little did i know that it would traumatize me from head to toe ..i lost my confidence ..every time people came around me i kept certain distance ..it come to my nerve when a boy want to conversate with me..even for a normal purpose..so i started avoiding everyone..and guys around me thought that i had some stingy attitude problem..even when my family and friends want try to conversate on what should i do..or not..my mind start racing and i began to thought that everyone around wants to control me just the way i w as 14 years back..it had affect my relationship with my family and friends..a lot..and i thought that i would be losing myself..i was kind of girl who want to hide her face behind the veils..but all these things were affecting and biting me deeply..wounding me every time..it was not my fault..and why should i let myself suffer..even today when my parents visit his home..because i never disclosed it to them..he talks to me shamelessly ..crack jokes..and portray himself to something that I knew is only a mask..I wrote this blog not only for me..but also for several other girls who are struggling to survive with smiles on their face when people are around..but cry and sulk alone and suffer among herself ..people should not judge or predict others because u don’t know what kind of pain and hardship they had suffered and may be still suffering..it could be your daughter wife ur girlfriend sister..so whenever a u saw a girl..with strange demeanor don’t judge her ..if u couldn’;t soothe her..the least u can do is not to lash her again..
And girls stop degrading yourself..because its not you..who have been degraded.. its him..who is to be degraded..because it takes courage to come up and keep a step forward..
I made my step..I hope u make yours too!
— Survivor, age 21
Dear survivor,
I am really proud of you for taking the steps to come forward. Both speaking out and staying silent take huge amounts of courage. I have found that speaking out takes a huge weight off your shoulders. I hope others find strength and comfort in your post and take this step, as well. Light and love, Alissa