I was only 7 years old when it happened. It was the night before my parents were getting married. We were visiting my family in and getting very excited for the big day. My cousins and I were always so close, we did absolutely everything together. You would think our family was perfect and had no problems at all and that we always go along. Later in the evening my mother and aunt were up talking. I was with my cousins watching tv and just having a good time. I couldn’t stop thinking or talking about being a flower girl for my mom on her wedding day. I was so excited. After a couple hours had passed, it was bed time for everyone except my cousin and I. I asked him to play Barbie dolls with me and he agreed. At that time he was 6 years older than me, which made him out to be 13. We were in his room and all of a sudden he got up to go close the door and he also locked it. I didn’t think anything of it because I was only 7 years old. He started staring at me and stopped playing with my Barbie dolls. I thought he was tired so I decided I was going to go to bed. Before I could even say anything, he pulled me and slammed me against the wall. I tried to scream but he was covering my mouth the whole time. He then picked me up and threw me on to the bed where I kept trying to run but I didn’t make it anywhere. He ripped my clothes off and punched me from trying to run away and raped me. My mother always told me to never let anyone touch me. I knew something was terribly wrong with him. He told me if I told anyone he would kill me. But I wasn’t scared of him. I raced into my mothers bedroom a little after and told her everything. My cousin had gone to jail for a very long time and of course 11 years later I still think about it. It’s made me stronger as a young lady. For others who are reading this, don’t ever be afraid to speak up for yourself. It could change your whole life.
I think its awesome that for whatever reason you felt OK to tell somebody straight away. If we could help all girls do that we could dramatically reduce rape frequency.
I believe that as more survivors share their experiences that more and more people will begin sharing theirs. I believe that this is one way to stop sexual violence from occurring. As survivors shed their shame, others will see that the shame is not theirs to carry. When someone is victimized they might then have the sense that they will not be judged or shamed for what happened to them. Your voice and your story will be one that inspires others to speak up. Thank you for that and thank you for your bravery.