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May 7th, 2019

Too much trauma

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I applaud your mission and vision. Watching Brave Miss World was very cathartic. I had a very tough childhood, enduring physical abuse from a stepfather. When I was 11, I was molested by a male cousin. At 19, I was raped and sodomized by my boyfriend at the time who...
March 17th, 2023

Indigo

I returned to fine art in 1990 when I took at class in indigo dyeing at San Francisco State University. I was lucky that the instructor, Yoshiko Wada, and another student from her class, were in the East Bay so that we could carpool together. We would talk textiles on our weekly journey across the Bay Bridge to the Campus. The other student was an accomplished Quilter named Linda MacDonald. Linda lived in Willits near the famous Mendocino Art Center, but traveled to Berkeley to attend this class once a week. The Indigo vat was made in a 32-gallon garbage can and had to be kept covered between dyeing sessions. Indigo is a unique rich blue dye that develops with an oxidization process when exposed to air. Dipping the fabric several times, and allowing the natural fiber to oxidize before dipping it again, creates darker shades of blue. The dye in the vat is created from a mixture of indigo pigment, various chemicals and a reducing agent to remove oxygen from the dye. It is a rich green color while in the vat, which shows up on the fabric before it is fully exposed to the air. The smell emitted from the dye is unusual, a musky odor in my mind. I like to think that it smells like the color blue. The vat needs to be carefully stirred and maintained between dyeing sessions. There is a “bloom” on the top of the vat created by oxidized indigo, making a bubbly and shiny ball of material reminiscent of a flower. The “bloom” gets moved to the side before entry of the pre-wetted fabric. The process reminds me of baking bread or making yogurt where the steps need to be carefully followed to achieve the desired results. In the process of bread and yogurt making, there are living cultures involved in order to create the product, and with the creation and dyeing process of indigo, it has that same feeling of being alive. In order to create interesting patterns, my classmates and I would use resist techniques on the fabric like pastes, stitching and clamping. Simple household items like clothespins could be used to create patterns by folding and then placing the pins at intervals along the fold lines. Beautiful and surprising results were achieved using these methods. Image of Indigo dye on fabric during the oxidization process. My dream of being a professional artist, all started in early childhood, and the first memories of my creations go back to Nursery School. I loved playing with all kinds of materials, like paint, clay, and crayons, just to name a few examples. Mel (Melanie), painting at Jack and Jill Nursery School, Walnut Creek, California, 1960. In 1974, a neighbor in Marin where I was living at the time and studying art at College of Marin told me about an Art School in Mexico. I ended up sending off slides of my work with an application to the Instituto Allende, and was delighted to hear that I was accepted. I began my journey to study there in San Miguel de Allende by flying to Mexico City in January of 1975. A bus ride completed that journey. When I first arrived, I moved in with a family who had two small children, including a newborn. It seemed like a safe living situation for a 19-year-old woman, but that shortly proved to not be true when the husband started coming on to me. I ended up finding my own place on the other side of town. It was a spacious abode with a wall that was shared with a weaving factory next door. There were 2 adjoined bedrooms, a bathroom, a large living/kitchen area and a small concrete patio out the back door. There was no hot water, refrigerator or a telephone. When I needed hot water for dishes, I would boil some on the stove. For showers, I had to build a fire in a box below a water tank outside to get hot water. I felt much more secure living there and walking a further distance to the Instituto on the other side of town than living with the husband who had made me feel so unsafe. There was the Central Plaza, which was called the “Jardin” that was in the middle of town, and I would pass through it on my walk quite frequently. This was the site of fireworks and festivals, like the celebration of Cinco de Mayo. The streets were cobblestone and many charming shops and galleries were located downtown. The School itself was on a beautiful campus with large ornate doors in front that were closed when school was not in session. Photo of the closed front doors of the Instituto Allende I had heard about you and what you had done to other women before you appeared in my main living space one sunny spring afternoon pointing a gun at me. You had a bandana wrapped around your face and tied behind your head. I had heard you first, in the bathroom. Dressed in a long polyester dress with colorful psychedelic patterns. I wasn’t wearing any underwear or shoes. I walked through the 2 bedrooms and turned left when I saw you standing there. I screamed and shouted, “help me,” thinking that workers at the Weaving Factory would hear me and come rescue me. Nobody came. You said to me “Coyote” which I later learned meant to be quiet or to shut up. You grabbed my shoulders and dragged me out the unlocked back door onto the concrete patio. The tops of my feet got scraped. I gave up. I knew you were going to rape me. I just wanted you to finish as quickly as possible. You took off your belt and put down your gun. Somehow I managed to pick up your gun and threw it over the wall embedded with glass on the top, into the alleyway. The same wall you had climbed over to get into my place through the unlocked back door. Towards the end of this ordeal, I heard a knock on my door. You left, climbing back over the wall. I answered the door. My friend Rhonda had come by to visit me. I told her what had happened and we walked to the Police Station nearby. I had your belt with me. The one you left behind. I went to the front counter, telling the officers behind the counter what had happened to me. They were laughing and playing cards at the time. I showed them your belt. They told me to bring you in if I saw you again. I left with Rhonda and took a bath at the where place she lived. We didn’t talk about what happened. We moved in together shortly after that. I sent a telegram to my father and stepmother about what had happened to me. Nobody came to help me. Rhonda helped me when I got hepatitis A and could no longer go to school. I was on my own when it came to figuring out how to return to the Bay Area. I moved in with my father and stepmother. They didn’t talk to me about what happened to me. They sent me to a doctor who diagnosed me with type 1 diabetes. He showed me how to give myself insulin injections. He told me to practice by injecting oranges with empty syringes. My mother told me years later that “You were never the same again” after what you did to me. I survived. I gave up art for 15 years before realizing that I wanted to go back to art school. In those years, I became so disturbed that I had panic attacks, deep depression and needed to move in with my mother at age 30. I started therapy after becoming self destructive in my 20’s. Depression also called “the blues” has been my long time companion. It has taken me a lifetime to heal. My iPhone predicts the words, depression, PTSD and C-PTSD for my text messages. After my Indigo dyeing class at San Francisco State, I enrolled in the Textiles Fine Art program at California College of Arts and Crafts (now known as California College of the Arts) in Oakland. I was married at the time and had become pregnant with our daughter Emily right before classes started in September. Emily was born on May 13, 1991. By the Fall of 1992, I was a single mom and an art student. An inheritance from my mother who died in 1995, allowed me to graduate and to buy my first home. I continued to work with indigo dyeing and created a large textile piece about my experience in Mexico. After many years of therapy and other healing modalities, I recently started painting on canvas. Part of that process has been a Soul Retrieval session to bring back my 4 year old self who loved to paint. I am feeling uplifted and encouraged after many years of recurring periods of severe emotional pain. Stay tuned for more details about my new work. One of my final pieces was a textile called “Out of the Blues.”
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I returned to fine art in 1990 when I took at class in indigo dyeing at San Francisco State University. I was lucky that the instructor, Yoshiko Wada, and another student from her class, were in the East Bay so that we could carpool together. We would talk textiles on...
December 26th, 2020

I don’t know what to do

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Today I was hanging with my brother’s friend at my house and he held me down and tried to have sex with me. I repeatedly said no. I pushed his hands away but he held me down. He asked once more, i said no, he said he wants to take...
April 1st, 2021

Sex doll

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After work one night I was drugged by a co-worker. I woke up in his bed naked. He was not in the room. I felt 2 emotions very heavily and immediately. Shame and wrong. I remember looking around for my clothes in a panic. I don’t remember how I got...
March 19th, 2023

Simple games was a way to hide...

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Trigger warning: I am healing well after many many years of understanding and facing the sexual abuse I experienced as a child. I think it’s important to share this experience so parents can look out for similar behavior in abusers. Please watch for innocent games that could really be more....
September 18th, 2019

Raped in the Air Force

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My first duty stationed 28 years ago, i was sexually assaulted by my first supervisor and violently raped by an officer in my unit. The violence of that raped, ruined me for a long time. Suffer from severe PTSD and after 31 years i am being forced out of the...
June 11th, 2025

Just Words

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Just words. You have trouble talking about these things. You realize you have trouble talking about a lot of things. You remember being excited about your first job at Dairy Queen. One of your friends works there and you know a lot of people work there as a summer job....
March 8th, 2016

Abuse Continued

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My story differs from a lot of stories here in that, there was no actual penetration (unless it happened to me during my sleep, which I sometimes wonder). I was molested by my mother’s ex-husband. I must have been around 7, 8 or 9. This “man” lived in the house,...
August 19th, 2019

I lost all the important people in...

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I lost everyone. My parent divorced me. Only living family member because I was too angry. I do have anger, but not the screaming kind my mom does to me. Lost all my friends. I fast for all holidays and my birthday. Usually not more than 1 day. A significant...
December 17th, 2019

dad and mom rape

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PLAYED BASEBALL FOR 3 YEARS IN FRONT OF MY HOUSE WITH MY SON, AND THIS 6TH GRADE GIRL NAMED SAM ,WAS TRYING OUT FOR THE BASEBALL TEAM AT SCHOOL .SHE LIVED 4 DOORS DOWN FROM ME .SHE STARTED TO PLAY WITH US AND GET TO KNOW REAL WELL. ONE DAY...
June 27th, 2019

Survivor of child molestation and date rape

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I grew up in a family that was great at keeping secrets. I remembered bits and pieces of a night when my parents had gone out and left my two brothers and I with a male adult. Nothing came about with these brief memories until I was at university and...
October 12th, 2023

Workplace Sexual Harassment

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As I write this story to you, please note that this sexual harassment case is still in progress. It began in December of 2022 when I worked as a contractor for a company named TEKsystems. I do IT work for Nutrien Ag Solutions. The first week I was there, I...
June 18th, 2025

Glitter Girl, Gone.

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HE picked me up the first day in the shiniest white Toyota I’d ever seen. Hallucinating halos of light around him, I knew in my heart: this was the man I would marry. Almost 15 years older, but so handsome, so experienced. We seemed to have everything in common—intellectual passions...
January 2nd, 2022

I am a Survivor

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I didn’t want to be a survivor once I realized what happened. Hell, I still don’t want to be a survivor. I was seven years old when I first got raped, when something first happened to me. I didn’t understand, I was so scared. It happened by my aunt’s husband....
April 23rd, 2023

a shattered girl and her dreams restored

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My name is Abby and I want to share my story with you because I want to be who I needed when I was there…as a million shattered pieces on the ground. I was raped at age 15 by someone I barely knew. For a few years though, I didn’t...
June 8th, 2019

We had sex before

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I met this guy in class and he wasn’t really my type but he was really into me and liked me so I thought I’d give him a chance. We hungout a couple times and eventually had consensual sex a couple of times. I realized I didn’t want anything romantic...
May 16th, 2020

I am a survivor

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MY STORY I WAS REPEATING MY GRADE 9 IN WILLOWMEAD SECONDARY. EVERYTHING WENT WELL UNTILL I DECIDE TO SKIP SCHOOL FOR THE FIRST TIME TO ATTENDED A HOUSE PARTY. MY FRIEND AND I WENT TO THE HOUSE PARTY THERE WHERE STUDENTS FROM SOUTH VIEW HIGH. MY FRIEND AND I WHERE...
March 5th, 2024

My step dad raped me

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I would have never imagined the person who I praised and idolised could have ever hurt me this much. An individual who I adored more than I could have anyone. A parent is a person whose sole purpose is to provide, care for and show love to their child. A...
June 1st, 2019

The Life I Live

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When I was 7 my cousin started touch me. He was older and he said it was okay we were practicing. I wasn’t sure what he meant. This went on for 3 years. He would touch my body and claimed it was his. He said it was a way to...
January 3rd, 2024

lucky

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this is my second post and i’m retelling my story better. i’m 15 and i’ve been struggling with substance abuse since 13, including hard drugs. my anxiety and jealousy in my new relationship has caused me to struggle a lot recently and i ended up going to my guy friends...
August 29th, 2020

Why you should talk to your daughters...

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At 16 I began dating my first serious boyfriend. I kept it a secret from my mom since she made it feel like I couldn’t talk to her about anything, love, sex, school, nothing. I had recently turned 16 and he was 17 at the time. We went to the...
July 19th, 2021

Child sexual abuse

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My child’s father has been sexually abusing her since she was 3 months old.
June 7th, 2016

Was It My Fault?

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My experience has left me confused so I would really appreciate it if someone could help me understand this. First off I was 19 when this happened & I’m 20 now. This happened back in September of 2015. I was in a sexual relationship with a Marine & I had...
March 29th, 2019

My First “Boyfriend”

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My first “boyfriend” raped me. He was two years older than me. We met at a park; he was the first boy that ever showed interest in me. We texted for a few days, and he convinced me to let him sneak over to my parents house in the middle...
August 24th, 2019

Help !

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14 and i was inappropriately touched, scared forever, changed, afraid. 3 years later i understand it was sexual assault and i moved on. 17 and someone pushed his foot inside of me through my clothes now i am thinking if this count as rape or not I think that if...
August 13th, 2022

Scammer

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This is my story; Being a fan of a few Korean actors and follow them trough a fan page is a great way to be updated for all the in’s and out’s. Especially you can share these with more admires all over the world, we all admire these amazing actors....
May 25th, 2019

The Trauma That Made Me

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I was raised in a broken home in a broken home from a pretty young age. Not young enough that it’s all I ever knew, but young enough that visitation schedules were a steady part of my life. I am the oldest of my parent’s 3 children, but my dad...
October 13th, 2022

i was 5 , 12 , 13...

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When i was 5 , i vividly remember things that happened around that age. Of course no one looked at the signs or acknowledged it and that only made it worse. I don’t remember who touched me first to make my behavior that way but this is what i remember....
June 8th, 2023

Unethical or illegal?

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Last year my partner and I worked for the same business. It was a small business near a small town and it had no management or HR of any sort – only one man owned and ran it, even though it served thousands of people each year. I hit it...
March 25th, 2022

Marital Rape

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My husband raped me through the night of February 7th 2020. I was unconscious due to prescription medication taken after being in a car accident two months prior. Police arrested my husband. He posted 25k bail and got out the very next day. Bruises on my stomach and my hips....
November 15th, 2020

J’avais 13 ans

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J’avais 13 ans j’étais allé avec mon amie chez un gars pour la soirée ils étaient trois gars et c’etait la première fois que je buvais de l’alcool et ce gars qui s’appelle pascal m’a agressé. Je ne l’ai dis a personne et j’ai fait comme si rien ne s’était...
December 22nd, 2015

Is There Still Hope

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I was 9 or 10 when it happen it’s pretty sad because I don’t remember much. I was at my best friend’s house and we were playing with her brother downstairs in his room. So we ended up sleeping down there and I woke up to him raping me. I...
October 19th, 2025

My boyfriend

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8 years ago I got into this relationship with this boy, he made me feel seen, heard, and wanted. I don’t remember much, but what I do remember was he tried to force himself onto me at a park with children around and got mad when I told him no....
January 1st, 2021

raped and isolated

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The man who raped me was 30 years older than me. I was very young and lonely, didn´t have contact to my parents or true friends so he was my father figure. He raped me one night before me having my exam. He raped me again one night when I...
November 11th, 2020

I think I was raped

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I don’t know what to do or what to say. I haven’t told anybody because I don’t even truly know what happened. This weekend I was drinking at a friend’s house. I didn’t drink a ton- one beer and one mixed drink that was in a gallon jug in his...
August 30th, 2019

My story growing up with a secret

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I’m a black South African, I’m 40 years old now, and my son it 20 years old… loved, taught but I still can never live him alone with my nieces as I was left alone and violeted💔💔😭😭 I have spoken about this, but I hate putting this down in writting😭😭...
November 1st, 2020

rape

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I was raped by my ex boyfriend Austin Buechele and he made me think it was okay, and he still threatens me till this day even though we have an epo against him. – Maddison, age 17
April 12th, 2019

23 with a secret

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I begin writing every time a new story inspires me but I can never find the words to tell the world what happened so many years ago.I always ask myself why am I not as strong as these other women? Why can’t I ever get the words out my mouth?...
September 16th, 2019

I didn’t know it was rape, I...

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As I sit here watching brave miss world on Netflix I am sobbing. Maybe I’m not alone, probably I am. I was raped by a boy I had a crush on when I was 16. I had drank a glass of wine which had been drugged so even still today...
September 2nd, 2020

This Is Me, my fight song

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College has started, around this time I was a college freshman fully moved in and Saying bye to my parents. I felt so cool living on my own in my own place, doing my own thing and the best part was, I was playing soccer. It was everything and more....
August 18th, 2025

We go to the same church

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I didn’t have the best college experience. While at college there were several men who made inappropriate comments about my body, sent me lewd text messages, and would follow me around campus. I was already uncomfortable around men due to child sexual abuse so it all just heightened my anxiety....
April 27th, 2019

Everyone Else Likes You, Too

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I had never been to a bar before. Sure, I’d gone out to Applebees with other coworkers where they’d serve me drinks. But I was 19, and had to drive home. I had never been drunk before, and didn’t push my limits. I went to the bar to see him...
April 25th, 2024

Another kid raped me

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When I was in kindergarten there was a girl that everyone hated, she would pin other younger kind down and rape them but to us it just looked like punching and stuff like that. That wasn’t OK but we were scared that she would punch us if we told the...
September 14th, 2019

Men Like Brett Kavanaugh Make It Hard...

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This will come as no surprise to many, but I found myself thinking about my rape more and more during the Kavanaugh hearings. The rich student party boys taking advantage of girls at parties, forcing themselves upon at least one that we’ve heard about, it all seems too similar to...
April 9th, 2020

People don’t think your spouse can rape...

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6 months ago my husband forced me to have sex with him because it was his birthday and he deserved it. Even after repeatedly telling him no, I was forced to comply with his request. I felt dirty after that. Like my marriage had been deviled. I went into a...
March 29th, 2015

Rape

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When I was 14 (1 year ago) me and my friends had agreed to go to a party on a Friday night. About a week before the party someone mad an Instagram account and started saying mean things to us like “I’m gonna rape you” and “go die” then the...
January 20th, 2020

School Bathroom

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I was sexually harassed for a period of two years by a group of eleven boys. The ringleader was stalking me both on and off campus as well as online. One day he followed me into a bathroom and pushed me against a wall when I turned to confront him....
December 5th, 2020

Summer 2019

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I got my first job working at a lovely Mediterranean restaurant/cafe one summer because my teacher said she knew the man who ran the place and put in a reference for me. I was 15. He was in his 60s. Two days after I started, the groping began. Only he...
August 30th, 2019

My story growing up with a secret

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I’m a black South African, I’m 40 years old now, and my son it 20 years old… loved, taught but I still can never live him alone with my nieces as I was left alone and violeted💔💔😭😭 I have spoken about this, but I hate putting this down in writting😭😭...
October 28th, 2019

I was carrying his daughter.

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I’m in a tough spot. I was seeing a therapist for recurring nightmares and was diagnosed with PTSD. Due to some financial limitations recently I’ve had to stop seeing her and it’s been very difficult. So I thought maybe I would give this a try. I’m sorry this is kind...
May 8th, 2019

Spoke out and was blamed

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I am the only girl at a job of 4 men. I am also 20 while these men are 40+. One worker would grab me from behind when I would walk in the back to the bathroom. This would happen often. One day all my coworkers had to go outside...
August 10th, 2014

Halloween Nightmare

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I was raped at the age of 22 while in college. It was my senior year and all I was looking forward to was running well and making the grades in school. I was on the varsity cross country and track team for my university and when October came it...
October 15th, 2022

Male dancer

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Hello my Name is Tj. This happen about 4 years ago I was 19 years old at very young age I always tried to see the good in people. I was always happy and felt nothing could break me down went threw cancer as a baby lost my brother and...
December 26th, 2019

Ms.

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I was raped by a co-worker when I was in my mid-20’s. We were at a work function, we were all drinking, then about 10 of us went to his place to continue the party. He grabbed me on my way out of the washroom and dragged me into his...
May 21st, 2019

raped by my own brother

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I was maybe 11 or 12 when i got raped by my brother. He would put me in his room and take off his pants and tell me to touch his penis and I was so scared i did. then he would take off my pants and touck my private...
August 26th, 2020

Stranger, Friend, Lawyer, and Youth Leader

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People have accused me of being a liar and the one with whom the fault lies… repeatedly. They use statistics to give themselves a platform to shame me or to feel better about their lives, because they don’t want to face reality. The reality is that statistics are not always...
June 20th, 2023

Sexual harassment

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When I was 17 years old, I used to go to my older cousin house for the summer and helped babysit her kids. Her husband who was a pastor started touching my me and would constantly tried to convince me to have an affair with him. I tried to stay...
May 24th, 2019

The Statistics that Changed Me

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2 sexual assaults and 1 rape… the statistics of my story. I can’t promise that this story is pleasant, but I can tell you that power and growth comes with telling it. So sincerely, thank you for hearing me out. October 2017 I was in Chebut, Argentina(a part of the...
March 14th, 2015

Broken Trust

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I had a friend who I quickly became very close with. I was very depressed at the time and he was too so I spent all my time with him and went to his house everyday. However, when I started falling asleep there, he would touch me and I would...
August 18th, 2019

Abusée par un voisin de mes grands...

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Bonjour chère Linor, Je suis en train de regarder Brave Miss World. Merci! Je témoigne car j’en ai peu parlé dans ma vie. J’avais 4 ou 5 ans. Je vivais avec mes grands-parents et ils me posaient parfois le samedi chez la voisine qui me gardait pour aller à un...
October 9th, 2022

When My Body Wasn’t Mine.

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I remember the times where my body wasn’t mine. When you grabbed my barely developing body forcefully. And my small body with little to no strength could not fight back. Could not take away your hands from places that were supposed to be private. Places that were supposed to be...
August 17th, 2019

My/our German “Weinstein” Case

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My name is Jany Tempel. I live both in Germany and Thailand. I turned public now, to end the big silence of our country. Almost twenty years ago I had already written a novel about my arduous life. The book wasn’t published back then, mainly because I reported on crimes...
August 24th, 2020

He Was a Family Friend

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Trejo molested me when i was 8 years old. We lived on 548 Calle cinco de mayo in Juarez Mexico. He was one of my step dad’s “Carnales” and offered to let him stay with us while him and his wife looked for a new house. The house we lived...
July 24th, 2019

LOST

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When I was 5 years old, I was sexually assaulted by many men. The next day I tried to kill myself. At the age of 10, I was raped and again tried to end it by ending my life. I also am a survivor of FASD and there for not...
August 17th, 2019

My/our German “Weinstein” Case

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My name is Jany Tempel. I live both in Germany and Thailand. I turned public now, to end the big silence of our country. Almost twenty years ago I had already written a novel about my arduous life. The book wasn’t published back then, mainly because I reported on crimes...
March 5th, 2016

My Only Brother

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My parents were always out so it would just be me and my brother which was fine he took care of me and we were close so I never thought he would hurt me or tell me anything wrong so I trusted him. My mom went to work her night...
January 2nd, 2022

I am a Survivor

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I didn’t want to be a survivor once I realized what happened. Hell, I still don’t want to be a survivor. I was seven years old when I first got raped, when something first happened to me. I didn’t understand, I was so scared. It happened by my aunt’s husband....
November 19th, 2023

I was very dumb.

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I doubt many people have gone through this, but I wanted to share. I was 9 years old when it was my first time visiting Omegle. Immature and stupid of me, I know. I just wanted to meet new friends. I had already learned about sex and peoples bodies from...
January 6th, 2019

Black Girl

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As a black child she grew up with many black women An atmosphere of mostly females and children A plether of differences yet many the same someone points the finger but no one takes the blame Attenion seaking variances of competition with the appearance of being soft For the man...
November 27th, 2024

I know when I see a rapist...

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The stalking, gaslighting, victimizing, and of course sexual abuse, were never okay with me. But you just don’t get that because you’re a predator.
July 8th, 2021

Dad Raped Me

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1) this man “casually” crossed my boundaries. When I told him to stop, he did, but throughout the encounter he continued to ask me if I would like it if he did the thing that I told him explicitly he could not do. I never mentioned this interaction being poor...
April 30th, 2022

Manipulation

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I was thirteen. I was dating this kid from another school, we had been seeing each other for about five months before the assault had occured. i had always noticed him getting violent with me or getting manipulative when he wanted me to do something i wasnt comfortable but i...
April 21st, 2021

A respectable collegue

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The next day I walked down the stairs to the hotel, aware that he was sitting at the table having breakfast. Some things you think would never happen to you, you think that working externally with a colleague (married and with children) is not dangerous. But then in a moment...
June 24th, 2020

Too naïve

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I was 16. I had my first job, a lifeguard. I was so excited. I have been a swimmer since I was 5 so this was a very fitting job for me. I was the youngest person working there by far. Most of the kids were in college and one...