CLICK BELOW FOR WAYS TO GET INVOLVED

CLOSE

Bring Brave Miss World to your community or campus
to spark conversation, awareness and change.

>> Click here to host a screening

Sharing your survival story can inspire others who may be
victims of sexual assault to receive the help they need.

>> Click here to join the conversation

Buy a T-Shirt or make a donation and be part
of the solution for rape awareness and prevention.

>> Click here to make a donation
>> Click here to buy a t-shirt

Why Was No Not Enough?

It happened less than a week ago. Let me start by saying I was not technically raped by society standards. I was sexually assaulted. But the backlash is just as painful.

I was at a get together with some friends. Just 5 of us. Not unusual for us to do. We had been planning for a good week to get together and drink and play games. We were up all night having a good time when I had too much to drink. These were people I thought I could trust myself to be around under such circumstances.
I don’t originally remember why I was alone with him, or where my other 3 friends went. (Later I was informed that 1 of my friends (the only other girl) was ill and was taken out back by the other 2 boys).

I suddenly remember him.. Being on top of me.. With his shirt off.. Kissing me intensely. I remember not understanding what was happening. I could barely move and talking just led to a misc. Mix Of mumbles and moans. He started to grind on me and I began to piece together what was happening and my surroundings. I finally said “stop.. Please”. But he kept reassuring me, saying “how do you know you don’t like me? It’s okay. It’s fun. Were friends”

I then felt him suck on my neck and then pull down my shirt and put his mouth on my breasts. “I don’t want to do this with you”.. I tried to get up and he grabbed my hands to pin me down.

“I have a condom” he said as he kissed down my stomach and left yet another hicky. And then he pulled down my pants and began to finger me aggressively. I begged for him to stop.

The last thing I remember was thinking “tell him you’re going to get sick” .. And i truly believe that’s the only way he let me go.

I ran downstairs to my friends out back crying and telling them what happened. I don’t think they understood the gravity of the situation because they just called me down enough to sleep in a different room. I had to see him the next day and I was just numb..

It wasn’t until I found the bruises on my thighs and the hickies… And it hurt too much to walk.

Now all I want to do is shed out of my skin. I freeze when memories are triggered. I cry out of nowhere and I never go out unless it’s to see my friends. I can’t sleep without having vivid nightmares. And I’m scared I will see him. I feel powerless and weak. I feel like no matter what I do, he won. And I don’t see how the pain will go away.. Why Was No Not Enough.

— Cat

2 comments

  • Cece
  • Kea

Comments

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *