I was a freshman girl. I was 14. I stayed after school to retake a test and pay my art fee. As I was walking towards the art building, a guy that I’ve only talked to a few times appeared. He told me he had something awesome to show me and I believed him because he was just a friendly dude that I knew around school. He brought me near the outdoors boys locker rooms and he pulled me in there. I was still oblivious. I looked around and he’s standing there taking his “thing” out of his pants. I immediately froze. I had never seen that before. For a 14 year old freshman, I was pretty innocent. I still didn’t fully understand what was happening. I was kinda stupid. He pushed me against the wall and started kissing me. He stole my first kiss and soon stole my virginity. I was frozen in shock half the time. Of course I hesitated. Of course I tried to push him off. But soon after struggling I just gave up. I should’ve kicked him in the balls and broke his glasses but I was that confident then. I hope one of you reads this and learns that if someone’s doing something to you that you don’t like and they won’t stop, kick their ass. -made up name
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Dear Made Up Name – Thank you so much for posting your story here. What happened to you was NOT YOUR FAULT!!!! You were not stupid – freezing is actually a very common response to trauma. You are not alone in that; so many of the stories posted in this community talk about freezing. I know we hear a lot about “fight or flight” but freezing is a third option that for some reason we never talk about. Looking back and thinking about what you should have done is so easy but if you had fought more, or kicked him, who knows what would have happened. You got through it and now you can heal from it. I would encourage you to talk to a counselor or a therapist or another adult you trust. The onus of what happened IS ON HIM. I’m so proud of you for speaking out here and I believe you can heal from this. Sending you love and support, Alexis