Great for Linor and her support system. Yeehah. I’m really happy someone actually believed her and did something about it.
Most women of domestic violence/rape are shunned, embarrassed, ignored, ridiculed, blamed, etc. Even in the good ol’ middle class US of A… mostly by family members and friends. This is very common. Family of the abuser doesn’t want to deal and after the fact, the wife/victim is not their concern even if they have been in the family for years. After years of asking for help. Crying out. Desperate for someone to do something, we end up devastated, ruined and without anything. No one believes us. Nobody! Of course not, the abuser is ALWAYS innocent with his family. You opened up the dirty secret and now you shall suffer! There is rarely help out there.. No one really wants to deal with someone that has been through this trauma… sad to say. Most of us end up depressed and dead because it’s just too much for another human being to deal with.
No one understands the stigma of rape. That even after it happens you feel worthless and damaged forever. I won’t let people get close anymore. I’m turning 40 in a few weeks. I’ve never married or had children. I don’t talk about it. And people act like it never happened.
Thank you for posting. We hope that Brave Miss World and this website can change the landscape. Someone is going to read your post here and feel a little less alone. Keep speaking out! You are #IAmBrave.
Have you seen the film? Let us know if you want to organize a screening in your community. Love from the Brave Miss World Team.
Thank you for posting. I’m glad you found the site and hope that you can see the movie. The entire message of the movie is to not stay silent, regardless of what anyone says or how you’ve been treated in the past. You CAN find a family of supporters who understand and have literally lived through it, too.
You are right, most people don’t want to talk about domestic violence. Nobody wants to believe it’s happening or deal with it once it’s out in the open. And the abused person is left alone, depressed and ashamed with no desire to live. It’s hell.
I was abused by my stepdad for years. He molested his own daughter and she didn’t want to talk to police once it came out. He also did it to some of my friends. My family cannot discuss it and while they admit that it happened, it’s as if it never happened. We’re not even a family really. Nobody wants to deal with it. Most people in the community that I grew up in didn’t even believe it. I don’t know why and I never will. BUT, I want you to know that there are people out there who have lived through it, too. It’s hard work to own it and really deal with it, to reach out and to find others who you can talk with about it with. But we’re out here. And we feel the same things that you do, including the depression and lack of desire to remain alive because you already feel so dead and alone.
Have you considered going to a screening in a nearby city? There are constant postings of different screenings in different cities on this site. That is where I met a group of people who I can now talk to. We live in different cities (except one person) but we keep in touch, and it’s the first time I’ve ever been able to share and have friends who have been through it before, too. The whole process has helped with my healing…and still does. The abuse never really goes away but it does get a bit easier to deal with and it’s easier to manage the feelings that come up.
I hope that you’ll continue to visit this site and please post something back here if you want to get in touch. I’ll figure out a way to connect, even if it means leaving my email address and we can email from there. There is also a place on Facebook where people connect and there are weekly discussion topics. I’m not on Facebook but I know it’s there. Check it out.
Take care and thank you for posting.
Debra
Thank you for posting.
Debra