Ex-Boyfriend

I dated my boyfriend for 4 years on and off. He was extremely emotionally and physically abusive. He isolated me from everyone I knew, including my parents and made me feel like he was everything. He was the first guy I slept with, and even the first time with him I didn’t want to but he said if I didn’t sleep with him he would break up with me. I was fourteen. I wasn’t ready for it. When I graduated from high school he was arrested. I moved away, started university, attempted a fresh start and made all new friends. When he got out he tracked me down, and he cornered me when I was leaving class one night. It was a late night class so there weren’t many people around. He came up behind me and held a knife to my back. He made me walk to an isolated area and said if I screamed he would slit my throat. I cried and cried but he ripped my clothes off anyway, called me a slut, punched me repeatedly and raped me. He left me there bruised and broken. I told my best friend right after, she was extremely supportive and was there for me. I still felt completely isolated. I felt weak and powerless. I didn’t feel like i could report it because he was my ex boyfriend.

Two weeks later I was walking to my dorm at night and there he was again. He was with a friend that I had met when I was dating him. He grabbed my arm and pulled me along. My whole body was limp. I hardly remember the walk. I completely froze. They took turns raping me. His friend pulled out a gun and held it to my head when it was all over. My ex stopped him, but threatened if I went to the police he would have me killed.

I never went to the police but he left me alone after that. It affects everything I do, and I’ll never be the same person I was before it happened. But I am stronger than I ever was, and that I am thankful for.