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July 10th, 2019

So drunk I can’t remember

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I was turning 18. I was partying like any teen would. I drank a lot. I threw up, sat down. They picked me up and put me in their car. They said “don’t worry we’ll take care of you. You won’t miss the bus”. I remember lying on the bed...
February 8th, 2021

Sexually abused by my step brothers

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I have lesbian parents. My mum and dad were never together and me and my mum lived alone until I was 3, she met a lady, who is now my step mum, and they got engaged and we moved in when I was 6. She had 2 sons, one aged...
July 24th, 2019

LOST

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When I was 5 years old, I was sexually assaulted by many men. The next day I tried to kill myself. At the age of 10, I was raped and again tried to end it by ending my life. I also am a survivor of FASD and there for not...
April 17th, 2021

“I should do this more often”

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I was 6 the first time a man ever touched me. At the time I didn’t know it was wrong, I thought it was normal. My biological father would touch me in the bath and help lotion me up afterwards massaging me as he does. I knew I didn’t like...
June 5th, 2019

Christianity teaches men to treat women like...

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I was born into a Christian household, 12 siblings, my mum was pregnant with twins,when I was 19, the guy I started dating (courting) was perfect in the eyes of my father, he has 8 siblings and both attended the same Christian church. We married after 3 months, on our...
March 28th, 2025

My abuse story victim to survivor

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Abused by ex-family friend and started to be put into sex trafficking but i survived
June 19th, 2022

I didn’t even know I was pregnant

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When I was thirteen I had one friend. I had a selective mutism and non-white in a very unsafe households, with a single absent mother who was debting, and I was bullied in school. I was already sexually abused every night by my biological father, and was constantly dissociated from...
October 12th, 2023

Workplace Sexual Harassment

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As I write this story to you, please note that this sexual harassment case is still in progress. It began in December of 2022 when I worked as a contractor for a company named TEKsystems. I do IT work for Nutrien Ag Solutions. The first week I was there, I...
October 20th, 2019

my brother in law

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two years ago my brother in law raped me. he had been molesting me since i was i was 11 years old, just months after he and my sister got together. for years i did not understand what was going on, i thought he was bring friendly, when he wasn’t...
March 22nd, 2023

I was 14

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I was 14 when I first experienced the touch of a man. Not a boy, but a man. A man that I resided and trusted in. A man who was supposed to protect me. A man who I called my step father. No one could’ve prepared me for the maturity...
July 30th, 2022

Some of my story

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For a long time I left things unsaid about what I’ve experiencedin the care of NJ as a ward. The number of abuses I experienced are numerous, and difficult to hear and read, even this late they bother me but I’m working through them…they include: Having my underwear pulled down...
November 11th, 2016

Let’s Fight Back With Love

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Hi fellow survivors. The recent posts I am seeing on this site sadden me because we are all strong survivors and we should try to always remember this. I know like me, many of you are still having a hard time processing that a man who is so clearly a...
September 14th, 2019

Men Like Brett Kavanaugh Make It Hard...

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This will come as no surprise to many, but I found myself thinking about my rape more and more during the Kavanaugh hearings. The rich student party boys taking advantage of girls at parties, forcing themselves upon at least one that we’ve heard about, it all seems too similar to...
February 8th, 2015

Abused at the Age of 4

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I wased raped at the age of 4 by own uncle I was just a innocent child couldn’t do anything to save me! He took avanage of me when my mom would leave to school or when my own parents weren’t home. This happen for about a year straight. Everything...
October 15th, 2022

Male dancer

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Hello my Name is Tj. This happen about 4 years ago I was 19 years old at very young age I always tried to see the good in people. I was always happy and felt nothing could break me down went threw cancer as a baby lost my brother and...
April 27th, 2019

Everyone Else Likes You, Too

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I had never been to a bar before. Sure, I’d gone out to Applebees with other coworkers where they’d serve me drinks. But I was 19, and had to drive home. I had never been drunk before, and didn’t push my limits. I went to the bar to see him...
November 15th, 2020

J’avais 13 ans

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J’avais 13 ans j’étais allé avec mon amie chez un gars pour la soirée ils étaient trois gars et c’etait la première fois que je buvais de l’alcool et ce gars qui s’appelle pascal m’a agressé. Je ne l’ai dis a personne et j’ai fait comme si rien ne s’était...
December 6th, 2020

“My Rape” at University

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I was 21 and at my second year of university. I was at a study group with 3 friends and it was around lunchtime. 2 of them suggested Chinese and decided to order and collect. I was left alone with my “friend”. It felt a little awkward as a week...
June 21st, 2021

Drugged raped and failed by justice

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On March 31st, 2017, I planned an early evening out wanting to catch up with my good friend Wendy, 35, a teacher for the Santa Clara County Juvenile Detention Center. We went to a place in Downtown Willow Glen. Wendy picked me up from my home about 8 pm. We...
August 6th, 2020

I regret not telling

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When I was in high school, I dated someone briefly. He never told anyone about me to his family or friends. I ended things after a month or two, because he was really into kissing and wanted to do more than that. I didn’t want that though as I was...
March 17th, 2023

Indigo

I returned to fine art in 1990 when I took at class in indigo dyeing at San Francisco State University. I was lucky that the instructor, Yoshiko Wada, and another student from her class, were in the East Bay so that we could carpool together. We would talk textiles on our weekly journey across the Bay Bridge to the Campus. The other student was an accomplished Quilter named Linda MacDonald. Linda lived in Willits near the famous Mendocino Art Center, but traveled to Berkeley to attend this class once a week. The Indigo vat was made in a 32-gallon garbage can and had to be kept covered between dyeing sessions. Indigo is a unique rich blue dye that develops with an oxidization process when exposed to air. Dipping the fabric several times, and allowing the natural fiber to oxidize before dipping it again, creates darker shades of blue. The dye in the vat is created from a mixture of indigo pigment, various chemicals and a reducing agent to remove oxygen from the dye. It is a rich green color while in the vat, which shows up on the fabric before it is fully exposed to the air. The smell emitted from the dye is unusual, a musky odor in my mind. I like to think that it smells like the color blue. The vat needs to be carefully stirred and maintained between dyeing sessions. There is a “bloom” on the top of the vat created by oxidized indigo, making a bubbly and shiny ball of material reminiscent of a flower. The “bloom” gets moved to the side before entry of the pre-wetted fabric. The process reminds me of baking bread or making yogurt where the steps need to be carefully followed to achieve the desired results. In the process of bread and yogurt making, there are living cultures involved in order to create the product, and with the creation and dyeing process of indigo, it has that same feeling of being alive. In order to create interesting patterns, my classmates and I would use resist techniques on the fabric like pastes, stitching and clamping. Simple household items like clothespins could be used to create patterns by folding and then placing the pins at intervals along the fold lines. Beautiful and surprising results were achieved using these methods. Image of Indigo dye on fabric during the oxidization process. My dream of being a professional artist, all started in early childhood, and the first memories of my creations go back to Nursery School. I loved playing with all kinds of materials, like paint, clay, and crayons, just to name a few examples. Mel (Melanie), painting at Jack and Jill Nursery School, Walnut Creek, California, 1960. In 1974, a neighbor in Marin where I was living at the time and studying art at College of Marin told me about an Art School in Mexico. I ended up sending off slides of my work with an application to the Instituto Allende, and was delighted to hear that I was accepted. I began my journey to study there in San Miguel de Allende by flying to Mexico City in January of 1975. A bus ride completed that journey. When I first arrived, I moved in with a family who had two small children, including a newborn. It seemed like a safe living situation for a 19-year-old woman, but that shortly proved to not be true when the husband started coming on to me. I ended up finding my own place on the other side of town. It was a spacious abode with a wall that was shared with a weaving factory next door. There were 2 adjoined bedrooms, a bathroom, a large living/kitchen area and a small concrete patio out the back door. There was no hot water, refrigerator or a telephone. When I needed hot water for dishes, I would boil some on the stove. For showers, I had to build a fire in a box below a water tank outside to get hot water. I felt much more secure living there and walking a further distance to the Instituto on the other side of town than living with the husband who had made me feel so unsafe. There was the Central Plaza, which was called the “Jardin” that was in the middle of town, and I would pass through it on my walk quite frequently. This was the site of fireworks and festivals, like the celebration of Cinco de Mayo. The streets were cobblestone and many charming shops and galleries were located downtown. The School itself was on a beautiful campus with large ornate doors in front that were closed when school was not in session. Photo of the closed front doors of the Instituto Allende I had heard about you and what you had done to other women before you appeared in my main living space one sunny spring afternoon pointing a gun at me. You had a bandana wrapped around your face and tied behind your head. I had heard you first, in the bathroom. Dressed in a long polyester dress with colorful psychedelic patterns. I wasn’t wearing any underwear or shoes. I walked through the 2 bedrooms and turned left when I saw you standing there. I screamed and shouted, “help me,” thinking that workers at the Weaving Factory would hear me and come rescue me. Nobody came. You said to me “Coyote” which I later learned meant to be quiet or to shut up. You grabbed my shoulders and dragged me out the unlocked back door onto the concrete patio. The tops of my feet got scraped. I gave up. I knew you were going to rape me. I just wanted you to finish as quickly as possible. You took off your belt and put down your gun. Somehow I managed to pick up your gun and threw it over the wall embedded with glass on the top, into the alleyway. The same wall you had climbed over to get into my place through the unlocked back door. Towards the end of this ordeal, I heard a knock on my door. You left, climbing back over the wall. I answered the door. My friend Rhonda had come by to visit me. I told her what had happened and we walked to the Police Station nearby. I had your belt with me. The one you left behind. I went to the front counter, telling the officers behind the counter what had happened to me. They were laughing and playing cards at the time. I showed them your belt. They told me to bring you in if I saw you again. I left with Rhonda and took a bath at the where place she lived. We didn’t talk about what happened. We moved in together shortly after that. I sent a telegram to my father and stepmother about what had happened to me. Nobody came to help me. Rhonda helped me when I got hepatitis A and could no longer go to school. I was on my own when it came to figuring out how to return to the Bay Area. I moved in with my father and stepmother. They didn’t talk to me about what happened to me. They sent me to a doctor who diagnosed me with type 1 diabetes. He showed me how to give myself insulin injections. He told me to practice by injecting oranges with empty syringes. My mother told me years later that “You were never the same again” after what you did to me. I survived. I gave up art for 15 years before realizing that I wanted to go back to art school. In those years, I became so disturbed that I had panic attacks, deep depression and needed to move in with my mother at age 30. I started therapy after becoming self destructive in my 20’s. Depression also called “the blues” has been my long time companion. It has taken me a lifetime to heal. My iPhone predicts the words, depression, PTSD and C-PTSD for my text messages. After my Indigo dyeing class at San Francisco State, I enrolled in the Textiles Fine Art program at California College of Arts and Crafts (now known as California College of the Arts) in Oakland. I was married at the time and had become pregnant with our daughter Emily right before classes started in September. Emily was born on May 13, 1991. By the Fall of 1992, I was a single mom and an art student. An inheritance from my mother who died in 1995, allowed me to graduate and to buy my first home. I continued to work with indigo dyeing and created a large textile piece about my experience in Mexico. After many years of therapy and other healing modalities, I recently started painting on canvas. Part of that process has been a Soul Retrieval session to bring back my 4 year old self who loved to paint. I am feeling uplifted and encouraged after many years of recurring periods of severe emotional pain. Stay tuned for more details about my new work. One of my final pieces was a textile called “Out of the Blues.”
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I returned to fine art in 1990 when I took at class in indigo dyeing at San Francisco State University. I was lucky that the instructor, Yoshiko Wada, and another student from her class, were in the East Bay so that we could carpool together. We would talk textiles on...
November 19th, 2023

I was very dumb.

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I doubt many people have gone through this, but I wanted to share. I was 9 years old when it was my first time visiting Omegle. Immature and stupid of me, I know. I just wanted to meet new friends. I had already learned about sex and peoples bodies from...
December 23rd, 2022

When school isn’t safe. (Australia)

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I was in year 9. I endured over 6 months of sexual harassment, intimidation and violence every day during school times. The teachers were aware of this, but their only concern was the length of my skirt. Whether I was “asking for it”. Being “overdramatic”. The boys who did it...
May 3rd, 2019

Nearly 50 years later

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In an odd way, I am a “victim” of sexual abuse, even though I have never met the abuser. Her is my father, but he is also either my grandfather or my uncle. I was adopted as an infant, and my mom and dad always told me I was adopted....
August 24th, 2020

A letter to the monster

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Penetration, no matter how slight, of the vagina or anus with any body part or object, or oral penetration by a sex organ of another person, without the consent of the victim. That’s how the FBI defines rape. That’s what you did that day. You raped me. I realized it...
July 18th, 2020

I should’ve known

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My roommate (Girl 1) and I were close friends. We were both international students and the only 2 in the whole university that came from a tiny country in Asia. When a third girl (Girl 2) joined us, we all rented an apartment together. Girl 1 and I already had...
June 11th, 2025

Just Words

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Just words. You have trouble talking about these things. You realize you have trouble talking about a lot of things. You remember being excited about your first job at Dairy Queen. One of your friends works there and you know a lot of people work there as a summer job....
October 28th, 2019

I was carrying his daughter.

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I’m in a tough spot. I was seeing a therapist for recurring nightmares and was diagnosed with PTSD. Due to some financial limitations recently I’ve had to stop seeing her and it’s been very difficult. So I thought maybe I would give this a try. I’m sorry this is kind...
June 8th, 2023

Unethical or illegal?

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Last year my partner and I worked for the same business. It was a small business near a small town and it had no management or HR of any sort – only one man owned and ran it, even though it served thousands of people each year. I hit it...
May 2nd, 2023

He was 15

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My stepbrother wanted to play “house” with me and my other step siblings. He decided I was the mom and he was the dad. He shooed my step siblings out of the room, locked the door, turned off the lights, laid down next to me and touched me. After 10...
August 17th, 2019

My/our German “Weinstein” Case

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My name is Jany Tempel. I live both in Germany and Thailand. I turned public now, to end the big silence of our country. Almost twenty years ago I had already written a novel about my arduous life. The book wasn’t published back then, mainly because I reported on crimes...
May 12th, 2022

Angry and confused

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When we were little, my brother and I were best friends. He was only a year older than me, and we did everything together. I remember the first time he touched me, I was 5 and he was 6. We were in the pool. I cried. It didn’t happen again...
August 30th, 2019

My story growing up with a secret

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I’m a black South African, I’m 40 years old now, and my son it 20 years old… loved, taught but I still can never live him alone with my nieces as I was left alone and violeted💔💔😭😭 I have spoken about this, but I hate putting this down in writting😭😭...
December 18th, 2020

Running

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March 7th 2019. Thursday evening. It was a week and a half before purim. I was 18. Five more days and there’s the Hachtarah, the biggest show of the seniors, and I was the main actress. Thursday evening. Only my father at home. I’m going out for a run. I...
June 24th, 2020

Too naïve

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I was 16. I had my first job, a lifeguard. I was so excited. I have been a swimmer since I was 5 so this was a very fitting job for me. I was the youngest person working there by far. Most of the kids were in college and one...
September 1st, 2019

My fiancé is my rapist but I...

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I have a past of sexual abuse but for the most part I’ve put it behind me though I get flashbacks every so often when watching a triggering show or something. My problem currently is my fiancé. This isn’t a new development in our relationship this started since we started...
May 24th, 2019

The Statistics that Changed Me

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2 sexual assaults and 1 rape… the statistics of my story. I can’t promise that this story is pleasant, but I can tell you that power and growth comes with telling it. So sincerely, thank you for hearing me out. October 2017 I was in Chebut, Argentina(a part of the...
June 15th, 2019

Men get raped too…

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When I was 17, I was raped by a man who was in his 50’s after boxing training. Couple days later I tried to lie to myself and say that everything was fine but it wasn’t. Therefore I told my brothers girlfriend. At first she believed me and asked to...
December 5th, 2020

Summer 2019

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I got my first job working at a lovely Mediterranean restaurant/cafe one summer because my teacher said she knew the man who ran the place and put in a reference for me. I was 15. He was in his 60s. Two days after I started, the groping began. Only he...
April 21st, 2021

A respectable collegue

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The next day I walked down the stairs to the hotel, aware that he was sitting at the table having breakfast. Some things you think would never happen to you, you think that working externally with a colleague (married and with children) is not dangerous. But then in a moment...
July 18th, 2024

I was just 9.

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All I wanted was a father figure, and you were there for me. I always thought it was weird how you would accuse me or now shower and ask to smell my privates just to know if I did, but I was just a child and I didn’t know better....
July 29th, 2013

Why: A Poem About My Rape

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Soothe my whys with soft whispers Wipe my tears with your love Make me whole again No more, I beg No more No more Unwanted touch Unwelcomed Stiff, rough caresses No man to hold me down, Give me forbidden kisses Legs forced apart Like rusty hinges Hinges to a door...
June 11th, 2019

Another poem about a not so perfect...

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Poem-The blade on the shelf: Plenty of times On plenty of days She does a bad thing To take it away She gets out a blade She lifts up her wrist She sets the blade down And gives it a twist She calms down As the blood grows thick It...
November 27th, 2024

I know when I see a rapist...

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The stalking, gaslighting, victimizing, and of course sexual abuse, were never okay with me. But you just don’t get that because you’re a predator.
June 24th, 2020

Too naïve

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I was 16. I had my first job, a lifeguard. I was so excited. I have been a swimmer since I was 5 so this was a very fitting job for me. I was the youngest person working there by far. Most of the kids were in college and one...
August 16th, 2019

Trapped with memories

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It was 2012, my mom had gone to a YMCA summer camp and my brother, dad, and I had gone to a party at my neighbors house, (I was only five-ish at the time so I dont remember the party details) my dad was intoxicated and our neighbor had to...
May 23rd, 2021

Rape in my locked home

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I have been raped numerous times in homes that are locked. I am divorced and live alone. Obviously drugged as no memories. The first time in my locked home after my divorce when I broke up with someone who admitted after dating him for months that he used to do...
April 1st, 2021

Sex doll

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After work one night I was drugged by a co-worker. I woke up in his bed naked. He was not in the room. I felt 2 emotions very heavily and immediately. Shame and wrong. I remember looking around for my clothes in a panic. I don’t remember how I got...
April 20th, 2022

So long, I’ll be seeing you everywhere

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He was my boyfriend. I thought he saw us as equals – after all, we used to be members of progressive parties in our country. But I was wrong. One night, I told him that I do not want to have sex that time because I might get pregnant. He...
August 26th, 2020

Stranger, Friend, Lawyer, and Youth Leader

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People have accused me of being a liar and the one with whom the fault lies… repeatedly. They use statistics to give themselves a platform to shame me or to feel better about their lives, because they don’t want to face reality. The reality is that statistics are not always...
September 18th, 2019

Raped in the Air Force

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My first duty stationed 28 years ago, i was sexually assaulted by my first supervisor and violently raped by an officer in my unit. The violence of that raped, ruined me for a long time. Suffer from severe PTSD and after 31 years i am being forced out of the...
June 13th, 2019

Males are Victims Too

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Iam a male and I am victim of abuse too, so I thought to share my story here too. I was probably around 5 years of age, happy kid as one should be. One day while I came out of the house to play, my neighbor’s son who was around...
December 26th, 2019

Ms.

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I was raped by a co-worker when I was in my mid-20’s. We were at a work function, we were all drinking, then about 10 of us went to his place to continue the party. He grabbed me on my way out of the washroom and dragged me into his...
May 8th, 2019

Spoke out and was blamed

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I am the only girl at a job of 4 men. I am also 20 while these men are 40+. One worker would grab me from behind when I would walk in the back to the bathroom. This would happen often. One day all my coworkers had to go outside...
August 16th, 2020

Does the pain ever go away?

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I really don’t know how to write this but I do want to try. I’ve been reading these stories for a while and have wanted to write my own but every time I try it’s too hard to actually put words down… I don’t know why this keeps happening. Every...
March 30th, 2024

raped & abducted

i went to the park & ran into someone i knew. we were hanging out while doing pills then out of nowhere two of his friends showed up. i was going to stop but one of his drunk friends kept pressuring me to do more so i did. we went to a house of one of the guys & we were just there. i was starting to feel out of it but at that time i was still in control of myself then the next thing i know i was on the bed laying down i guess i blacked out but i know the guys i was with were letting me sleep. then the next thing i hear was a guy i didn’t recognize outside the window. he saw me laying there so out of it he asked the guys who was i then they told him. he then climbed through the window started getting on top me, i kept saying for him to get off. i was so weak from the pills i wasn’t able to move so he then forced himself inside of me. i heard one of the guys try to stop him but then my “friend” told him to let it happen. next i remember him dragging me out the window then into his backseat of his car. the other guys were just watching then my rapist told them to close the door. i begged them not to leave me alone but they closed the door. my rapist forced himself on me again then i blacked out completely. i finally came to in the morning but realized i was on the floor at the park. so many bruises on my thighs & legs that he left me. how can a group of guys just watch him assault me & take me somewhere. thinking of where he took me & kept me all night what else did he do to me.
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i went to the park & ran into someone i knew. we were hanging out while doing pills then out of nowhere two of his friends showed up. i was going to stop but one of his drunk friends kept pressuring me to do more so i did. we went...
December 9th, 2023

i was a child.

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i was 6, i lived with my dad. I remember when he would get mad he would punch me, kick me, hit me over the head with any chance he got. When i was 6 he sexually assaulted me. I was sitting on the lounge and he started touching me....
May 16th, 2020

I am a survivor

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MY STORY I WAS REPEATING MY GRADE 9 IN WILLOWMEAD SECONDARY. EVERYTHING WENT WELL UNTILL I DECIDE TO SKIP SCHOOL FOR THE FIRST TIME TO ATTENDED A HOUSE PARTY. MY FRIEND AND I WENT TO THE HOUSE PARTY THERE WHERE STUDENTS FROM SOUTH VIEW HIGH. MY FRIEND AND I WHERE...
September 8th, 2021

Raped by ex boyfriend

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This is really hard hard for me because I haven’t really explained this to anyone but here I go. I was raped by a guy I knew when I was 14. I don’t remember much because we drank a lot one day and I only remember getting dropped off home....
May 22nd, 2019

You made me feel like I was...

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Imagine this, you leave work with your best friend and go over to her boyfriends house to hang out with him and one of his friends. When you get there the boys are in a room playing xbox, you and your best friend walk In. She hugs her boyfriend and...